I worry she's never going to forgive me

My daughter is 12 and I haven't seen her since she was six I was a mess when I was with her mom. I got out of the army but I was a real mess and started drinking. It got so bad her mom kicked me out. I was homeless when I met my second wife who helped me get my life together but I was too ashamed to ever really go back and my ex telling to never come back also has been replaying in my mind over the last few years.Long story short I had a few more kids with my second wife and a few months ago my ex was arrested the main details are that she lost her job and her home and she became a prostitute which really shocked me and I'm not judging her. I'm the last person that should judge my ex. I lied to my wife in the beginning about my daughter I told her she was niece and I did it because I was a coward. I was afraid to tell her how I ended up on the street where she found me. She knew my alcoholism was why I ended up homeless she just didn't know everything.I eventually came clean and my wife was not happy. My daughter has been living with me for months and her views of me have not changed. She does not trust me and when she's not angry with me well it's like she's afraid of me no matter what.I don't even know how to discipline her because if I get mad she gets scared and I feel like I'm at a loss. I want to be a dad to her but part of me feels I don't deserve to be and part of me feels like I don't have the right to be. I feel like there is nothing I can do to get her to see I've changed and I won't blame her if she never forgives me. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2E7BTrk