The butt of jokes

So this little gem happened about three days ago while visiting my mother and her farm with my five year old dd who I would like to add has toileting and bowel issues.At least once a week me and my dd go over to visit my mother and dd is allowed to help feed all the animals, she has been doing this since she could walk.We start with the horses and cows because they are closer to the house then we walk all the way down to the bottom paddock where the duck pen is. After walking all the way down and feeding the ducks we were just about to head back up and my dd says the words I always dread to hear "I NEED TO POO!!!!"Remember this little girl has toileting issues and bowel issues. Running back up to the house was not an option because there was no holding it. So unfortunately down behind the duck pen we were forced to take drastic measures. Yep she squatted... or at least she tried to the poor girl fell backwards and started crying. So there I am trying to help her up and she is telling me she has hurt her bottom. I get her up and she turns around to show me and I freaked out...THERE WAS A STICK POKING OUT OF HER BUTT.I completely froze trying to comprehend what I was seeing. I mean you hear stories about people turning up to ER's and I have always thought things like that couldn't happen by accident but here it was right in front of me.A minute must of passed while I was try do work out what to do. My mum yells out if she's(dd) OK an why was she crying I yelled back there's a stick up her butt. My mums lovely words of wisdom were "well pull the friggin' thing out".Thankfully upon assessing the situation it turned out it was just stuck between dd's cheeks and she only ended up with a scratch but my mum kept making butt jokes for the rest of the day.Tl;dr dd needed to poop and couldn't make it to the house so she tried to do it behind the duck pen and fell over and got a stick up her butt. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aVssOw

Getting up at the ass crack of dawn to watch TV

My step son (nearly 11) gets very limited screen time at our home during the week (we have him every other week). My husband and I both work so during the day he is at day camp and in the evenings we go to the pool, ride bikes, read etc. He can have 30 mins of TV if he has done his reading and his chores. He is allowed more screen time on the weekends.However, recently he has been getting up at the ass crack of dawn just to watch TV. I work night shift and this morning as I walked in the house at 5 am he was walking downstairs to watch TV. I shooed him back upstairs to go back to bed and he went but there was much eye rolling. Yesterday I got home a little later and at 6 am he was already downstairs watching TV. He is a holy terror without sufficient sleep and I know that he is waking up specifically to get as much TV time in as possible.Any suggestions short of throwing all the TVs out the window? I just bought a clock for his room (he has never needed one before) and telling him until the clock says 7:30 or 8 he cannot leave his room. Is that reasonable? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aaMyra

Sleeping Question

Hello,My child is 14 months old and has been sleeping through the night with no issues for probably around 9 months. We are just starting sleep training so that we can just put him in his crib and he'll fall asleep. The problem is that he always wakes up a few times before midnight. Our nightly routine starts at 8 and is in this order: bath, book, bottle, then sleep. It usually only takes him 10 minutes to fall asleep but he never stays asleep until usually around 11 or 12. I'm not sure what I can do to stop him from waking up, any suggestions? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aawwgJ

Friendships as a parent

Hey guys, I just want to know about stories about how your friendships and the friendships of your significant others have evolved since becoming parents. My wife and I have an 8 month old and I can definitely tell that my friendships have changed. We spend less time going "out" and spend more inviting others to our apartment. I know there have been fewer guy's nights and more nights in, in order to catch up on sleep. Even when we make plans with our childless friends, it seems that their expectations of the night (i.e. Going out, staying up late, drinking more) are different than ours. Has anyone else had a similar experience? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aotALU

19 month old son got flagged for a followup autism screening. Am freaking out.

I love the little bugger more than I can express.The rational side of me thinks he's definitely not autistic: - Super cuddly with both parents - Walks, even runs like a champ - Super smiley. Loves to smile right back at us. - Looks us in the eyes, looks where we point - Pretty good eater - Awesome sleeper - Never has shown hypersensitivity to noises or light. - Is starting to really put together a good vocabulary and phrases, including things like "I love daddy"Yet, I can't help but quiet the voices at the back of my mind because: - He is super shy. Took him a whole week of visiting grandma before he would play with her. - Has no interest in playing with kids his age - Is a little behind on fine motor skills like holding a crayon or feeding himself with a spoon - He is stubborn AF. Pretty sure he recognizes his name but only turns to look at you when he feels like it.I guess the only thing I CAN do is fill out the questionnaire provided by our pediatrician (who doesn't think he has autism but was required to give us there follow up form based on a couple of early screening answers we have) and wait. By I'm dying here and just want to be able to quiet the thoughts in my head.Anyways, just thought I'd vent and look for some support. I'm sure I'm not the first and won't be the last dad who goes through this. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aa6I4w

Question about nicknames

I'm a little peeved, because it seems like as soon as my husband and I announced our daughter's name, his parents started telling us what they would call her instead. Firstly, I like the name we choose. Secondly, I feel like it's a slap in face for them to plan on not using her name, and choosing their own for her. It'd be one thing for a nickname to grow organically, but it feels like the name we picked isn't good enough for them. Am oversensitive? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aUHynF

I miss my kids, need advice

Hi there.Sorry for the throwaway.I am in the marines and have had a lot of time away from my two sons (3 and 1). I am currently about half way through a nine month trip away. Every third or fourth weekend I have been able to visit home.I have been in the marines for six years and I have done my fair share of time away from my wife and children. But it's taking a toll on me. I feel like I am struggling to cope, and I am permanently upset. I think I may be slightly depressed.Two weeks ago I visited home and had a great weekend and my eldest son begged me not to leave again. It kills me.I just don't know what to do. Discharging is too much of a risk financially for my family. Sometimes I feel like I need to speak to someone but on the few occasions I have my superiors with children tell me to just get over it and if they could do it so can I.Has anyone else been through this? I am literally missing my children grow up and it's killing me.Thank you. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2anfnvy

The word "daddy"

Is there honestly anything better than hearing your small child say "daddy?" Doesn't matter how bad of day I'm having just hearing my youngest say that makes it go away.He doesn't care how bad work was or how insane traffic was he just needs and expects something.Having a 15 and 11 yr old too puts in on perspective and I'm holding onto this last one for as long as I can. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aogNJH

Let's go jump in mud puddles!

We woke up this morning to a dark, rainy day. Almost every parents worst fear on a weekend. So we made breakfast and watched Boxtrolls and even fashioned a fort out of our blankets. Then my oldest (he's 4) was looking outside and stated he wanted to go jump in the puddles. At first I was like "ummm no?! Are you nuts? It's, like, dirty and wet out there!" But as I stood in the kitchen a little while later yelling as they took turns slamming each other into walls it dawned on me; why the hell not?!? So I hurriedly told my son to get dressed (he went and put on his swim trunks, that smart ass) and get his rain boots on as I threw on some play clothes of my own. My husband decided to stay inside with the 2 year old. We headed out into the DOWNPOUR and quickly began jumping into as many puddles as we could find. Big ones, small ones, muddy ones, it didn't matter. The wetter the better! I laughed and played and realized I'm getting old. We went and got my husband and the other kid to come out and join us. They were screaming and running and I realized we all need to jump in puddles once in a while.When I was little my grandmother would come over to our house after a big storm and have us put on our suits and take us puddle jumping around our neighborhood. A memory I almost forgot about. But I got to relive that today. And thus crappy day wasn't so crappy.I am aware this post is silly, but maybe it will inspire someone else to just throw down and say "why not?"Here's an action shot :-)http://ift.tt/2a9JMSY via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2a9IHKQ

Found something deeply concerning in my son's room

I was cleaning my son's room today whilst he was at work and found this piece of paper behind his pillow. Im really concerned at some of the stuff he's written on here about himself and how this must look to other people if they saw it and don't know what to do. Here's a pictures of the piece of paper and what he has scribbled:http://ift.tt/2anSfAl this for attention because it seems like something he would do. Is he mental? He's 17 btw via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aUg7do

Baby mama drama

Using a throwaway. I don't know what to do. I'm lost as a parent and good friend of my ex (me 34, her 32). We separated and have been living apart for 3 years. We finalized our divorce earlier this year. We have a 6 year old son together that we share 50/50. I have him Wed - Sun evening or Wed - Sat night depending on the week due to my ex's work schedule. Generally, everything has been very amicable. We are able to work through everything concerning our son. I've helped support her financially and tried to be a friend to her when she needs one as well. She's important in my life.I dated someone with a child for a little over a year and this relationship ended in April. I wasn't falling in love with her the way I expected to, she had a lack of motivation about things, grumpy, and things just working out long term for me. We didn't live together, but on occasion we had sleepovers, flew to Houston to visit her family for a few days, and would hang out a couple times a week (though most of the time it was without my son).I don't have really any friends in the state I live in other than my ex and co-workers of mine. I started dating someone new at the end of May. She is someone that I am falling for, and would be someone that would want to be with me very long term, if not forever.At the end of June, I introduced my girlfriend to my son with a group of friends at the lake as they were doing paddle boarding activities and I thought it would be a good group activity for me to meet friends as well as my son to have a good time and play outside and participate. I told my ex and she got upset stating I was disrespecting her.Three years ago we discussed that we would introduce each other to a significant other before our child meets them. I didn't really think about that in this way since we were doing a group thing. She said that she didn't want people coming in and out of our son's life because that's what she had to deal with growing up. She wants our son to know what normal relationships are. I apologized, and asked my ex at the beginning of July if she can meet my girlfriend. She said yes, but this is the last time I'd be doing something like this for a while. I told her I feel strongly about her and it is really important for me to have this happen. It has not happened yet. When she started dating her boyfriend two years ago, she asked if I wanted to meet him before my son met him, I said no, and I would meet him eventually. I trusted her to make the right choice in having a significant other.On July 3, she called me an said she didn't want to ruin any 4th of July plans. She said that she is okay with me hanging out with my girlfriend and my son together if I keep it as friends, no sleepovers. I have kept up to that on my end.She texted me today upset because I hung out with my son and her last night at a drive in movie. She apparently meant that we could only hang out that one time, but during our phone call she didn't specify that. I told her she didn't and she didn't understand until she talked with her boyfriend and he confirmed the same thing I thought, that she meant it not just as a one time thing. She apologized after that, but said she's over being disrespected, being taken advantage of, and being talked to the way she's talked to.I do my best to be a good friend to her, to help her when she asks for help. What does she mean about being talked to a certain way? Sometimes she calls for technical help about something and thinks I'm answering in a snoody, condescending way. Maybe I do come off as that if it's something like as not being able to access her frequent flyer miles login, the reset password isn't working for her, and I tell her "I don't know, I'm not Frontier, the only thing I can do is try the same steps for you". Maybe I feel thats something her and/or her boyfriend can figure out together.I want to have things work out, I always have. I feel that I'm fair, and I do a lot of things for her and my son. But it's already affecting the relationship I'm trying to build. I'm lost, I'm stuck. Should she be that involved with my life? Am I being unreasonable? I'm not a drama person, but I get anxiety from chaos and drama. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2arA6zp

9-mo Baby wakes up too early, help

Hi, our 9-mo baby sleeps well through the night. Her typical bedtime is 8 PM. However, she is waking up too early for us! She wakes up at 5:30 or so. This is seriously affecting my partner's sleep. What do I do? Please help. Plays halp. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aUaWu3

Can we talk about chronic illnesses for a minute? And reasonable accommodations, and kids advocating for themselves?

My son is going to be a senior in high school next month. That means we've been looking at and talking about colleges a lot. It's pretty exciting that he'll be out there on his own soon!But there's a fly in the ointment. My son has arthritis. His joints hurt almost all the time and prevent him from doing a lot of "regular kid" things. He used to be big into rock climbing - he loved it and was really good at it. He even got a job at the rock climbing gym. But then his conditioned worsened, and he had to quit. I know he could have a 504, but there really aren't any "reasonable accommodations" that would allow hi. To continue his duties. You pretty much have to stand on a soft surface for hours at a time in order to belay.He's starting a new job soon as a prep guy at a pizza place. Having a stool to sit on while chopping tomatoes and onions is definitely a reasonable accommodation.When I think about college, I worry. How's that going to work? What are "reasonable accommodations." There's so much walking to do in college, on campus, to your dorm, socializing. I'm sure he can get extra time for assignments if his hands are hurting, right? But what will happen on days that he just can't walk a mile to class?And he's a kid that doesn't like to draw attention to himself. Up to this point, I've been his voice. But in college and work, he'll have to speak for himself. I can counsel him and help him, but in the end he has to do it. I worry that he'll suffer in silence and then just quit whatever it is rather than speak up and ask for help.I just have a lot of worries as he enters adulthood. Has anyone else here been through this? What advice can you give me? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2amHyuE

How do I help my son [16m] make friends? He says he feels lonely and needs help.

We have a 16-year-old son, he has Asperger's Syndrome, he's a bright boy, enjoys his schoolwork, is going to college in September (that's post-16 education here in the UK) and has numerous interests, mostly news, cars, coding, food and drink.More recently, he's become very interested in American/Canadian culture, wants to meet Americans or Canadians in our area, and find a girlfriend. He told me he's lonely and wants help but doesn't know how to make new friends, particularly finding ones who are local. He also wants a girlfriend too (but likes American girls mainly). He told me he liked American and Canadian women/girls as they were friendlier, more positive and not like stereotypes.I read somewhere online that people with Aspergers Syndrome often prefer to have a foreign partner but is this true, I know little about dating and Asperger's Syndrome as it is.Our area of Yorkshire is multiracial; Irish, Chinese, Indian/Pakistani etc. but he told me he feels lonely and specifically wants to try and find friends who are American/Canadian etc. so he can learn more about their culture and not rely on stereotypes of Americans.He told me that the only time he's really met Americans was some tourists in our area of Leeds and that they were nice people; he liked the girl and the girl liked him but he said it'd come to nothing as they lived in London.He said social media wouldnt help him, he needs to learn in person.How can we help him, we don't know what to do?Any other parents here have a child with Aspergers Syndrome?Would really like some help here, as me and my wife aren't sure how to help him. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2amsu0e

Safe to move into a house built before 1979?

We're looking at a great place (to rent) - price is PHENOMENAL for the area, some of the best schools in the state, great backyard, neighborhood, etc...but the house was built in 1970 and I know that lead is a concern for houses built before 1979. The reason we're getting such a great deal on the house is because it's what the realtor calls a "time capsule", as in ugly ass floral wallpaper, thick shag carpet (burgundy, which is great because it hides stains!) and everyone who has looked at it has been put off by its appearance, which doesn't bother us. They have not done any major renovations since they bought the house in 1980, from what I understand.They've done radon testing and everything has been cleared but they will not let us get the house lead tested because apparently the pros use some sort of laser (??) that will pick up the presence of lead underneath the wallpaper and encapsulating layers of paint, so it will test positive no matter what. I'm really not sure what to make of that but was planning on doing some of the 5 minute 3M Lead Checks on our next walk-through to see if there was anything on the surface, though I know for older windows and doors, residual lead can enter the air as particles every time they're opened/closed. On the next walkthrough we're planning on checking extra-hard to make sure the wallpaper is solidly applied, no peeling or flaking paint, etc, but I'm still nervous.We have a 2 year old and a 4 month old and will likely have another in the next year or two so I'm not sure what to do. I know people buy and rent homes built in the lead-paint era all the time and there are obvious things we can look for, but it's the not-so obvious stuff I'm worried about (I've read that it may be necessary to wipe down surfaces much more frequently to clean off dust particles off toys, etc), and I'd love to hear from other parents with experience in older homes, what you guys have looked for, what you've done, any lead-related experiences you may have, etc. I've found info that seems to be all over the place online, have tried to contact a lead expert to do a walk through with me (no word just yet), have tried to reach out to LeadFreeAmerica, etc. and I just feel like I'm in over my head in terms of making a decision that could affect my kids for the rest of their lives in a relatively quick span of time. There's no chance we'd get a house this big or in as great a neighborhood for this price again but I also don't want to take any unnecessary risks with their health. Any insight would be super helpful...TIA. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aTL69q

I've had enough of my wife's rage and anger

I'm starting to think it is Postpartum Rage. We have twins so it's already hard at 9 months. She lashes out so much now that I pull her up on it. Things like punching our bed or couch when they won't go to sleep, throwing a high chair against the wall because one wouldn't stop crying, and lots of sarcasm like "oh, you don't want to eat, never mind I made it especially for you, just like in the fucking book you little shit."Writing it out makes it sound really bad, but it's just raging like people do in a car with road rage ... It is just really aggressive and threatening but that's it. But it's the emotional impact I see on my boys. They see mommy rage and it upsets them. I have started pointing it out and usually get some catastrophised bullshit response like "you think I'm a bad mother" or a defensive "I'd never hurt them, I'm just tired and exhausted" or " you are only home when I'm having a bad time."I just hate it. Tonight After trying to explain her behaviour as concerning I basically said "They're my kids and I'll protect them, so stop raging at them. It's scares and upsets them." Understandably this was awful for her but I feel like she needs to hear these hard truths. She has a counsellor and visiting nurses, and I've no idea if she talked about it with them, but am starting to think if she hasn't then she should.Any advice or shared experience? I'm hoping it's a phase. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aAjVSs

How do you nicely limit the gifts from relatives?

My oldest's birthday is in November, and Christmas naturally follows. Some of my relatives will completely shower her with more gifts than we can even physically store in our modest home. My mother-in-law, in particular, buys a ton of cheaply made toys; not only will we have too many, but many of them will not last long.How do we set some sort of expectations, without coming across as being "those parents"?(p.s., I'll be researching a related topic with Halloween and Easter candy; these same relatives seriously gave my daughter several bags of candy last Easter) via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2amgcol

As a father, I don't want to pierce my daughters ears, am I overreacting?

inb4; My wife supports my decision, but I think she is just compromising.So i have a 2 yr old daughter. My SO has brought up getting her ears pierced, because it would look cute, but i don't feel comfortable doing it. I think we should wait until she wants it done, so she feels she had a choice in the matter/can take care of it herself.My SO has relented on this matter, but i see other people have done it, so i want to what you guys think via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2alqMCn

Stressed to the MAX. 3yr old daughter out of control! PLEASE HELP.

We are in desperate need of some advice! We are concerned that our daughters behavior is not normal and we don't know what we are doing wrong. Please give any advice you have and be specific. We have received advice like "you need a punishment" or "you need to set boundaries"...we know this but DONT KNOW HOW. Scenario: We are in a park, at home, the grocery store, OR ANYWHERE and tell her "no" or "we need to leave now" or "you need to drink a sip of water" AND IT STARTS! She screams uncontrollably AND has the lung capacity of an elephant. She screams like she's being murdered, and nothing consoles her except giving in. We've held out for an hour plus, we've tried counting, we've done time outs, we've done child locks on doors, we've tried snuggling/hugging, we've tried taking toys away, putting her in a specific time out chair, behavior chart, positive reinforcement, etc. etc. etc.Before anyone asks, she watches television maybe 1 to 2 hours a day, she plays outside often and gets plenty of stimulation from my wife who is a sahm right now with my daughter and 4 month old son. My wife takes her to playdates, parks, events, etc. and has endured several screaming fits at all of these places. The only things we can think of is to completely cut sugar out of her diet, and to take her pacifier completely away although she only has it for naps and bedtime currently. She is adjusting to a recent move, however this behavior started long before the move. She is currently throwing a fit right now and has been doing so for an hour and ten minutes and counting. Tonight we will probably give her a pacifier and put her to bed just to get it to stop.Corporal punishment - my wife was abused and is afraid of corporal punishment as an option. I personally don't like the idea of it because it seems like many people use it as a means to the end of their own frustration rather than to the benefit of the child. I do not want to take out our own frustrations on our child through spanking because I feel there are no boundaries for spanking, however to be honest, this behavior is having a serious toll on our lives and I am open to any ideas or advice anyone has. If you have advice about corporal punishment, please tell me what steps you go through before it escalates to that level(not when the do something really bad). My wife has enrolled her in preschool for two half days a week, mostly because she just needs a break from this, but we are afraid that our daughter will have one of these fits and be asked to not return to preschool. Please help Reddit!!!! via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2alm33h

Jewelry for toddlers

So- my daughter will shortly be 3. She has expressed interest in princess costume jewelry. I headed over to hobby lobby and they have an entire aisle of princessy charms; beauty and the beast, Cinderella, even Alice in wonderland stuff. I bought some charms and some gold elastic instead of chains. I went to assemble the necklaces and noticed that every package warns of LEAD. What?! A quick Google search told me that Claire's, Disney store, and H&M make jewelry for children with an unacceptably high lead content. So the princess charms will go back, and I will have to find another way to make my daughter feel like a princess. The point of posting this is that I never knew lead was so common in jewelry (even in jewelry marked lead free). FOR KIDS. Beware. Also, if anyone has suggestions for an alternative my daughter would be very appreciative :)TLDR: many children's jewelry items contain lead via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2algC4J

Busybody woman undermined my parenting at Target (rant)

So today I took my kids (6F and 2M) to Target. First we did the grocery shopping, and Daughter wanted me to make her a "balloon" out of one of those flimsy plastic produce bags. Then Son also wanted one, so I made him one too. This is a pretty common request and I see no harm in it if it keeps the kids entertained. With the bag inflated and tied in a knot there's no chance my kids can put it over their heads and accidentally suffocate or anything.So then we went to the swimsuit dept and I walked away from the kids in the cart for 30 seconds tops to ask a lady who worked there a question. When I came back this older lady was standing by my kids and she had taken the "balloon" away from my son. She said "he had this right in front of his mouth." I said "okay..." And went to give it back to him, and she said, "you're just going to give it back to him!?" I responded, "I'll keep an eye on him." She goes "no you weren't keeping an eye on him you were over there." I said "excuse me? He's my son, why don't you let me worry about parenting him." And I took it from her and gave it back to my son. And as I was starting to walk away with the kids she said "no" and took it from him and broke a hole in it and he started crying.I don't know if it was just because I'm a younger mom, and she was older and thought she knew better, or what. But I would never try to parent a stranger's child, and especially not in such a confrontational manner. I was INFURIATED. My daughter was also really upset, she kept going on and on about the mean lady and she also broke her balloon because she felt sad for her brother. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aikord

A friendly reminder to check your baby's fingers and toes.

This evening my normally happy, sunny baby girl became unusually grisly, and it was whilst my husband was giving her a cuddle that he noticed that she had one of my hairs wrapped tightly around her little finger. The hair was acting as a tourniquet, and her finger had gone slightly purple. I don't think it had been there long, as there wasn't any swelling, but if my husband hadn't noticed then it's possible she could have lost her finger.She is currently in a very grabby phase and almost always has a clump of my hair, even if I tie it back, so from now on I will be a lot more diligent in checking both her hands and toes. It is scary to think that a simple strand of hair could do so much damage. Please remember to check your babies! via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2akV9sA

Did I do the wrong thing? Am I selfish?

So, I'm juggling some guilty feelings within myself these last few days. My DD is 6 and has been in Girl Scouts for the last year, this will be her second year. The first couple months were great. No issues! I volunteered and paid to have outdoor training to take the girls camping. Cookie season came around and I volunteered to be cookie mom. I slung cookies like no tomorrow and our troop brought in over $2k in profit. I put us in a contest that won us $250 for the troop. These started getting a little fishy. Other parents would discuss that we were constantly being hounded for money left a right even after this profit, they would also state that they were upset over a new addition to the troop during cookie time after being told no new girls were allowed (the new girl and parent was a friend of the leader so we were told that she makes the decisions), and parents were upset on the way that the leader spoke to them. I decided to say something to the leader about the above things, and was the scapegoat for the other moms. The leader refused to give us any financial reports. We all dropped the issue after the leader finally agreed to pay the girls camporee fees out of the money we got from cookie season. It still grinded my gears that I had my name signed to over $15k worth of cookies and she would not allow me to see the bank financials making sure all the money was placed in the account, but I dropped it for the sake of the girls and their camping trip. Things happened on the camping trip regarding the way that the leader spoke with parents, only one said anything to her about it, but no apologies from her (about anything ever).Radio silence during the summer and then suddenly, we are asking for x y z fees for the troop starting at the end of August. They are asking for troop dues for the year (not for the National membership but just for the troop). With my calculations, we should have at the very very very least $1,750 left in the bank. So, I asked nicely if we could receive a financial report of have a meeting regarding the next year and the financials so everyone is on the same page this year to explain why we need troop dues. I'm met with the reasoning that I'm being rude with asking for information and that I should be assured that the leadership teams ideas should be good for everyone, etc. etc. I replied back that our children and the parents that pay for their experiences deserve to see at least a simplified copy of the reports and that I wouldn't be paying the annual troop dues and other expenses until I received them and if that this is an unreasonable request, then I will need to pull my daughter from the troop. I then receive a reply that I'm being ridiculous and if I want to pull her, here's the way to do it.So I am in the process of removing her from that troop and forming my own since my daughter has asked me in the past why couldn't we have our own troop so I can spend more time with her scouting. I formed the troop that I enjoyed my time with them last year, but that my daughter and I were moving on to try our own troop and that we hope we see them around at different events. Radio silence after that (even from those that asked me to stand up to these issues multiple times so they didn't have to confront them).I have been having terrible anxiety over this decision. I feel like I should have just stayed quiet, paid the money and started silently stepping back from volunteering even though the reason my daughter and I joined was to spend more time together. I feel scared about starting my own troop because I work full time, will be going to school online full(ish) time, and now will be partaking on weekly/biweekly meetings as a girl scout leader. I don't want to let my daughter down and I want to experience girl scouts with her in the ways that she wants. She didn't bond extremely close with many of the girls so she is find moving on to find new friends, but I still feel like I failed her by removing her from the troop somehow. I feel like I stomped on her opportunities since she was the second highest cookie seller last year and now has to forfeit the money she made to the old troop. I feel like I should feel relieved to get away from a toxic situation, but I still feel guilty.Thanks for taking time to read this. I appreciate you.tl;dr Got tired of toxic troop leader, removed daughter from girl scout troop to start own troop, daughter's ok with that idea, but i still feel guilty via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aF7jvZ

Unwanted baptism, party, dress, smash cake... where to bend, when/how to stay firm?

My almost 10-month-old has Catholic grandmothers (both sides) and a veerrrrryyyy Catholic great-grandmother (his side). Hubs and I had a Catholic wedding because Family, but are not believers, do not attend church, & will not teach kiddo the faith. I don't like it, but we're giving in on the baptism too because they think it's so important & won't stop talking about it. But all the stuff that goes with it is making me want to go RAAAAR NO HE'S MY BABY and move to Canada. I'm incredibly shy and reserved and basically a pushover around most people though. Consequently, I half want to shut the whole thing down, and half want to roll over and let hubs' family do whatever they want. I wonder if I should I allow some things and not others, or if that's just silly posturing & unnecessarily drama-mongering since it's all just for show anyways.Here are the things that I don't likeLying to priests: we won't raise the kid in the faith, that's not up for discussion. But I'm pretty sure that's required for baptism... lying is a no-no in my personal code of ethics, but if it comes down to lying or else no baptism, should I make an exception? I guess it would be hypocritical to NOT lie since I lied to get married. Though I still feel bad about that.Stupid dress: kid already got stuffed into the inlaws' heirloom baptismal gown once and hated it (he's very easygoing usually). It's silly, but I'm hating the idea of someone else deciding what my kid wears. He didn't like it & it'll be tight on him, but as MIL & GMIL said, it's only for an hour.New party outfit: Hasn't been bought yet, but upsets me for basically same reason as #2. It was described as being ideally tux-like, so I don't see that being practical to wear more than once or twice. OTOH, I'm not paying for it & it will please the inlaws.I guess I'll go along with what will inevitably be a huge party (though I'd prefer just to have our immediate families there) because it'll give me leverage to keep his upcoming 1st birthday small & simple.Smash cake: don't really like the idea of kiddo eating more than a spoonful of frosting. Plus it seems wasteful and so, so messy to me. But it's not like he gets sugary stuff everyday.Presents: he's probably going to be given crosses and crucifixes and bibles etc etc. We have absolutely no extra storage and I always feel guilty about tossing/donating religious stuff especially if it seems expensive. Should I make limits here or just let people do what they want to do? I can sneak stuff into my mom's attic without her noticing probably.To clarify, MIL just told us the baptism date and started party planning with GMIL yesterday. My mom is very pleased but uninvolved. Hubs is taking the "just do what they say and it'll be over soon" approach.Believe it or not, I'm generally very laidback, even when it comes to my kid. But my back is up about this whole thing for some reason, and it's the sort of thing that'll be repeated with my inlaws in one variation or another forever, so please give me some perspective! TIA via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2allMrn

Footsies

I'm sitting on our sectional couch with our newly-6-year-old. I'm sitting at an angle with my feet just barely hanging off the side. He reaches his little feet over and starts kind of playfully kicking my feet, and says, "Hey look, Mommy, we're playing footsex!"He meant footsies.FAILLL.Edit: Now he refuses to say it right because I laughed. omg. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aSx2NF

How to get my point accross without yelling?

I have a 4yo boy. It's usually just me and him cuz my wife works nights.Anyway, we have fun. We play games. We color. We go outside and play catch. We do some basic chores (he feeds the dog and helps with dishes). We have a lot of fun together.But I end up yelling a lot to get my point accross. And I hate yelling! I'm not an angry guy.Here's an example:We were just coloring. We spent about 30 mins coloring. I did several pages in my book, he did several in his. But now I'm done coloring and I want to go do something else. So I tell him,"That was fun! You made so many good pictures [blah blah blah you get it]. We're all done coloring for the day. I'm gonna go in the kitchen to clean up a bit. Just stay in your room and play with your toys for a while""Color!" He says"Nope. We're all done for now. We'll color again later"He starts whining, "Cuhhhhh-looooor!!!""Buddy" (I ALWAYS call him "buddy") "We are done coloring for now. Don't ask again, okay?""... color" he moans, as he shoves a coloring book toward me"That's enough, buddy. Put the books away. I'm going in the kitchen"He follows me into the kitchen, with his book."Color. Pleeeease?? Hey, color pleeeease???""NO!!!" I shout, "No! We are DONE coloring!!! Stop asking! We will color again some other time, but I have other things to do!! Now, go in your room and do something else!!"And then I feel like a jerk. He just wants to do something with me. He's not trying to be bad or annoying. He seriously considers me his best friend and he wants to hang with me. But I don't always have time! I have to sweep and mop the kitchen. That's a chore we can't do together. He'd just be in the way and I want to get it done.But yelling is the only way I get my point accross. I try suggesting other things. I try turning on the TV. I try everything I know to try. But when he's decided he wants to color with me, the only way I can get him to understand that it's not gonna happen is by yelling.It's not just coloring, either. It's every activity that we do together. He never wants to stop when its time to stop.Any ideas on how I can get him to understand without yelling? I hate yelling. It's just not my thing. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2a7YjP3

After one week Nanny requested more money, is this common?

My wife and I moved across country and both started new jobs. We hired a nanny and she started last week. Prior to her starting we went over her salary in detail, specifically how much she would get at the end of each week.After the first week, we were told that after calculating her bills, she needs an increase in salary.Is this common amongst nannys or is our nanny attempting to take advantage of the fact that we both started new jobs and can't take off from work in a city we know virtually no one? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aktGHz

Youth is wasted on the young

rantAnyone else feel this way?I expose my kids aged 8-10 to all sorts of experiences (travel, activities, sports, camps, etc.) that I was never privy too, but when asked what they like best, it's always "watching YouTube" or playing "iPad". They could sit on the couch and do that all.day.long.I recall when I was that age, I'd go to the library and read for hours. I got my first computer around that time -- which was pretty awesome of my parents -- and ended up learning to program and make my own games.Now, I'm probably a bad parent (i.e. this is all my fault) for enabling my kids with access to an overwhelming amount of technology after falling into the trap that early exposure is a good thing. But, how do I spark a passion for something, anything, in my children?I'm worried that when they grow up, they'll lack the grit and fortitude to make it... Unless professional YouTube viewer becomes a thing. What's the right course? No more iPads cold turkey?Anyone else feel this way? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ayVRiB

How do I approach my mother to talk to her about her blatant favoritism she shows towards one of my children?

I have a 3 yr old and a 1.5 yr old- both boys. My mom shows blatant favoritism to the oldest. At first it was okay because the baby was just a baby and we just chalked it up to the oldest being more interactive. But now the youngest is getting older and interactive and she still pays 1/4th the attention to him. My wife (rightly so I completely agree with her) doesn't want my parents watching the kids because of this. The youngest is getting to an age it will actually affect him. It is heartbreaking to me. How do I approach her about this? Frankly I want to just be straight forward- I guarantee she will deny it though. What do you think? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ahxzJ7

10 year old little brother has extreme anger management problems.

I'll be one to admit that I think I've lost control of him. If he wants something- he is able to cry enough to get - in public or not- he screams hits even starts crawling on the floor and throwing extreme tantrums. All he does is wake up and without having breakfast plays COD on his Xbox till 5pm- eats- than plays again. The reason I bring this up now is because recently his younger cousins have come over from Canada- and we were hoping this would help him as they will try and play with him 24/7. But it had the opposite effect- he kicks them out his room and shouts at them. We even have a Wii downstairs and the other kids have resulted into playing on that- but when he found out they were playing together on that- he shouted that it was his- and took it upstairs even though he never used it. He's been like this for almost 5 years now- and with our dad passing away young of unknown reasons 18 months ago- we thought that might have been the reason. So we put him through counselling for over a year- but it has come apparent that it hasn't really done anything.I've also picked up on what type of friends he has- and I am suspicious that one or two might actually be kind of mean at times- but that's just speculation. I'm off to Uni in October- and I don't want to leave my mum off to deal with him alone. What should I do to help him? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aEHoEd

I'm looking for a CUV/SUV that can fit 3 car seats

xposted here: http://ift.tt/2akNfcC know I know, a van would be the best, but we don't want a van. A van will be the fall back if no CUV/SUV is capable. The extra ground clearance works better in snowy conditions where I am. There have been multiple times in the past few years where a regular car will drag/plow through the snow on the roads. The ground clearance is also appreciated when we go overOur situations is that we have incoming twins and an 18m son.I'll need to be able to accommodate the following car seat configurations at different timelines:Time of birth: 2x infant car seats (Britax B-Safe) via lower anchor, and a rear facing seat (Diono Radian RXT)6-12 months after birth: the rear facing Diono Radian RXT will change to forward facing (timeline depends on his height/weight)9-15 months after birth: the 2x infant car seats will be switched to Diono Radian RXT car sears in rear facing configurationI haven't yet tried to fit 3x car seats in different cars yet, I'm merely trying to pare down my list of SUVs to try out. I'm will also try minivans to see the difference in utility. If getting a SUV is much shittier for my situation, I'll definitely opt for a minivan, but right now I'd prefer an CUV/SUV.I'm also going to try out some SUVs with all three seats in the 2nd row, and with two in the 2nd row and one in the 3rd. I don't know how well those configurations work. The obvious pro of having all 3x seats in one row is much larger cargo space, and the pro of the 2x/1x split is I'm assuming it's easier to put a child in the 3rd row versus in the middle of a bench.If we don't need to use the third row, then there are a wide variety of options.If I need to use the 3rd row, there are 2x SUVs currently on my radar, the Infiniti QX60/JX35 and Nissan Pathfinder. The primary reason for them being on the list is the way you get access to the third row. The second row seats slide forward, then tilt up. They do not fold. As a result, an unoccupied car seat doesn't limit access to the third row (it makes the gap a bit smaller, but it still works). Most other SUVs I've looked at with a third row don't give good access if you have car seats in the 2nd row (as the folding capability is limited).I'm only looking at models around 2 years old that have modern safety standards and are still in warranty. To save on the depreciation hit, I'm not looking for anything brand new. Reliability is key.Thanks!xposted to /r/parenting via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ahp2pn

I can't believe how intelligent my "practically five" year old is. That's her catch phrase.

My daughter came from an abusive relationship. My husband at the time took all my money, controlled my life and isolated me from my family. This may become a rant, I apologize in advance. He became a meth addict, and lost control. I was awarded primary custody, full legal custody, and he failed a hair follicle test. He was using meth daily. Long story short, he doesn't pay child support, doesn't work, and sells his plasma for money. And probably sells drugs on the side...[side note, he scams companies like QVC for money. He is literally, crazy and honestly, still has control over me and my thoughts]. I work my ass off, he pays nothing for our daughter, and I'm worried she'll grow up to become like him. He's been my ex husband for over 5 years now. I loathe him. But he still can make me feel like the shit parent because he buys her anything and everything she wants.Anyone else feel the same way? In short--- abusive and controlling ex husband; divorced 5 years, still making me feel like the shitty parent. I'm primary custodian and he still has my mind in his hands. ADVICE? :/ via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aGfjd0

Do you let a 7yo develop friendships organically or do you set up opportunities to make friends?

My 7 yo daughter is fun, smart and creative *typical I'd imagine for most 7 yo girls. She just finished first grade. She had three pre-arranged times where she got together with 2 different girls from her class during first grade because she asked me to set it up for her.Over this summer I'm home with her and her brother (4 yo) and half the time we also have her step siblings with us too (sister is also 7 yo and brother is 5 yo). So most days she has lots of people around. She's asked me once to set up a time to hang out with a friend, which is going to happen in August. But otherwise she really isn't all that interested in seeing other kids outside of school. During school she is in a hip hop dance group, attends after school program and seems to say goodbye to lots of kids. But outside of those situations should I be expecting her to want to see other kids?I don't ever remember my parents setting times for me to make friends. I had neighborhood friends as a kid. We live in a complex and are moving to a new one in August where more kids from school live. A bit about me is that I work full time and am not the most involved as far as school parents go...I'm not all that friendly with many other parents.My question is, should I be trying to set up more social opportunities for her, or should I wait until she asks? I don't want to force her if she's not ready but I also don't want to let her miss out. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ajZ8FF

Phrases I never thought I'd hear before I had a baby: "Iron Man kiss it!'

My almost two year old stubbed her toe. I said, "Mommy kiss it make it better?" She stood still while I bent down and kissed her toe. "All better!" I said.Then she walked over to an Iron Man toy laying face up on the floor and gently put her foot on its face. "Iron Man kiss it!" she said. She remover her foot. "All better!"For the rest of the afternoon she would gently bop her head on stuff, walk over to me and say, "Iron Man kiss it!" and expect me to touch the Iron Man toy to the "boo boo" so it could "kiss it". via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ayup4r

3 year old daughter - terrified of unlocked doors and wants mom to lock them

So this all started when my daughter turned 3. She would freak out whenever someone opened the back sliding door or when someone would come through the front door. She freaked out, cried and has 3 year old type panic attacks until my wife/her mother picks her up, walks over to the door and locks it all - all while my daughter is watching and monitoring the entire process. If my daughter is sidetracked and doesn't see the actual motion and process of the locking - she continues to freak out again until she witnesses it with her own eyes. Then after my wife does that- she runs to the sliding door screaming and demands my wife unlock and relock the sliding door (which was never opened during this entire process).We have been researching on this and see that it could be a phase - or there is a safety aspect that maybe only her mother can lock the doors securely and then the house is safe ? But it's really getting to us now and we're about to just start letting her freak out tomorrow morning and stop this whole locking process while calmly explaining that the doors are still locked - no one unlocked them , and it's safe.Honestly I/we are not sure what to do. If you ask her to come for a ride with you she's happy and leaves and goes outside like nothing is wrong (so she's not actually scared of outside) she even plays outside just fine..but when she's back she goes on an insane freak out until my wife goes around like a maniac locking doors - it's really taking a toll.I mean she's F'ing 3 years old - it worries me that she clearly has this illogical fear of unlocked doors - and scares me even more that there is a neurotic component here (with the act of watching her mother lock and needing to be held during the process)It's literally driving me insaneAnyone ever gone through this ? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ahdXEY

Food issues forever

My girl just turned 3. She has always had food issues. Started with her not chewing anything and just choking if everything wasn't finely pureed until she was in her twos. Now she chews everything but meals take forever to eat. I just timed her eating just a normal peanut butter and jelly sandwich and it took 50 minutes. She gets bored while eating and stops frequently, chewing slowly, and starts talking, fidgeting, looking around, etc... which I don't blame her for because she takes so long. It's very frustrating because eating for 3 hours a day really interferes with other things we could be doing, plus she didn't gain any weight at all while 3 which I think might be because she really doesn't eat that much. How long do your little kids take to eat a simple sandwich? Any tips for parents who have dealt with this? I'm on the verge of just pureeing her foods again. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aEuUN0

10mo sleep problems, only at night..

Hello, new parent here with a new problem with my 10mo daughter that's really starting to get to me and just can't nip it in bud.. since she was born, my girls always slept really well and putting her down was never much of a chore until about 5 weeks ago when bedtime at night has become a long drawn out battle...She just stopped self settling in bed and now will only calm while in someones arms being rocked. Quite literally, she's asleep with thumb in almost before I have her laying in my arms! As soon as I put her down (or even think about) she's wide awake screaming and just wont put the thumb back in.we're not sure what it is. Some nights she acts like she has reflux, other nights seems just over tired, other nights seem like teething. We took her to the hospital out of desparation one night, 3 doctors and 3 hours later they came up with nothing.The other frustration is that she'll immediately sit up if left crying in bed, so controlled crying methods don't seem to work. she's also a tension increaser, so when left to cry she escalates into hysterics with spluttering and choking so I can't see how that will help. We try sitting with her while in bed and pat or rub her chest, sometimes this works but other times we end up fighting her trying to sit up so then she starts waking up..Is this normal? What can we do to help her get off to sleep without building the bad habit of rocking? What can be done about the constant sitting up?This only happens at night, and usually three hours later she's down around 9-10pm. Her daytime naps are normal and she usually sleeps half an hour to an hour. She is cutting in a tooth right now, but this is 5 weeks going on 6 now. When she's finally down she'll stay asleep til 7-8am in the morning, its just getting her down in the first place without hours of rocking... via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2allHHi

Parents of young athletes / prodigies: Do you post about your kid's successes on Facebook?

I do not mean this to be a bragfest and I hope it does not come off that way. My 7 year old is very talented at chess. He competes about once per month at major chess tournaments for kids his age and he generally wins some kind of prize such as a trophy or a medal. My wife and I sometimes post this to our Facebook page where he has received lots of praise from friends and family. He LOVES to see how many people liked his post and I think it is very motivating for him. My wife feels that we are posting too often and friends / family may get bored or feel we are bragging. This week we traveled across the country, where he competed in an important tournament. It was a big battle, but he came from behind and won 1st place. But we did not post about it, so very few people in our circle know about his success. I wonder if we should have or not.The best solution might be to create a page just for him, so relatives could decide to join it or not, but I believe it is against Facebook's terms of service to create a page for young children.So, parents of young champions, do you spread the word about your kid's successes? Or do you only share selected achievements? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2agR706

Son was just born 10 weeks early, what do I do now?

Hi, everyone! I subscribed to this sub 30 weeks ago when my wife and I found out she was pregnant with our first child, and today she gave birth! Despite being so early, he weighed 3 pounds 12 ounces, and is doing very well, so far.My question is: what should I be doing, other than spending as much time with him and my wife as I can? I've heard horror stories about insurance (we're covered), is there anything we need to be looking into? I already spoke with the insurance company and our pump is on the way, bit I know there must be things I'm not thinking of.Any advice is greatly appreciated! via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2axUQHv

My sons are misbehaving and my husband undermines me

I wanted to crosspost my post from r/relationships here because I think a parenting perspective might be more helpful.Both of my kids are out of control. I had to pick my younger son (15) up from a house party after he drank so much he was throwing up. When my husband and I tried to change him out of his vomit covered clothes we found marijuana in his pocket. My husband wasn’t concerned because he thinks its normal for all teenagers to drink and try smoking. While I agree that this is common 15 is far too young for this behavior.My younger son tattled on his older brother (18) for using "harder drugs" to divert our attention. It worked because I shifted my focus to my older son and left my husband to handle the younger one. He didn’t disciple him enough because my younger son still comes home smelling like marijuana smoke. My husband maintains its not a very big problem. I’m convinced he told my younger son his opinion because now he thinks his behavior is acceptable.When I went to pick up my older son from his dorm room that he’s staying in for the summer the place was a mess. He kept falling asleep during our conversation because he was probably out parting all night. I made him come home and he’s been sneaking off at all hours of the day despite being grounded. When he’s home he locks himself in his room and sleeps all day or sits around in the backyard smoking cigarettes. He refuses to take a drug test so I don’t know what he’s doing exactly but I’m very worried about him.My husband thinks he’s only acting out because he’s not happy that he’s grounded for the summer. Once again he dismisses my concern and won’t talk to his son seriously. I don’t think either of the kids are taking me seriously because their dad is showing them that’s acceptable.I’m very stressed out about my children. I can’t be home all the time because I manage a company and have to work very long hours. This leaves the disciple up to my husband but he’s not very good at it. I also asked him to keep an eye out on our older son so we can find out whats really going on with him but he doesn’t take that seriously either.tl;dr: My two sons are misbehaving by drinking, and partying, and doing drugs and my husband wont help me discipline them. I'm worried about my sons, especially the older one, and I'm angry and frustrated with my husband. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2axNvYO

Problem with 4yo daughter petting the cats a little too firmly.

Hi all. So my daughter loves animals but she's a bit too rough with them. We've always taught her to be gentle with the cats but lately she's been smacking them when they do something 'wrong'. Any tips or tricks to get her to stop? I've tried the usual things, telling her no, sending her to her room, 'do unto others', and forbidding her from touching the cats. Today one of the cats was asleep in her dresser and she shut him in the drawer (he's a pretty chill cat, he was asleep when I found him - still not good, though). via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aaTXSS

How do you tell a 4 year old that his baby brother will not be arriving?

NOTE: This post is to ask for assistance. If you are here to judge, please start another post and I can engage there instead.We learned a few weeks ago that our baby boy has a fatal condition. After going through all the tests, reading through all the literature, all the forums for parents-to-be with the same situation, the risks to my wife, and the recommendations of all the medical professionals, we scheduled the termination next week.Has any of you been in this or a similar position? How do you break this news to a 4 year old sweet little girl who is so fond of her younger brother and declared herself lucky because she's gonna have a second baby brother?We were anticipating a happy Christmas season, and now instead we'll be mourning the loss of our third child.One of my favorite memories of the birth of our second child was my daughter holding him for the first time. She was ever so gentle with him, with a smile that just conveyed the happiness and love she felt for the new addition to our family.Every day she demonstrates to us several Big Sister traits that never fail to warm my heart and make me beam with pride. She has been looking forward to another baby, and I know she'll be heartbroken when she learns that the baby is not coming.Part of me is hoping she'll be too young to remember any of this - her mother and I will carry the memory of her third brother all our lives - but knowing her, I know she's not likely to forget.I fear part of her happy glow will fade, her positive disposition will lessen, her optimism at life diminish. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2agm2tC

Update to daycare question - am I being too Nazi? so this happened today

My son is often in a PNP that has tons of toys and mini activity gym in it (at the bottome)... fine...attached to that PNP on top is the napper/changer, which the caregiver uses to change all kids on, above my son.I kind of knew about this, but again, this is new to me, I didn't know if that was a huge deal.Come to today, I visit him at lunch, feed him, then put him down in that PNP. I look above his head on the bottom of the PNP, and what do I see, a chunk of poop. Hard, toddler poop. I point it out and come to find out today while she was changing a toddler, over my baby, the toddler ripped off her diaper and swung it around or whatever, causing some debris to fall down into my baby's area.I really don't know what to think or do. Too much? Move on? Let it slide? This is only our 4th week here. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aQz9BJ

UPDATE: When do you find time for sex?

Thank you all so so much for helping me with my question the other day. I got so much good feedback.I really liked the idea of getting down to business as soon as the kids went to bed. Usually I go to the gym at that time, but I had needs this week! Sexy time right after the kids go to bed has been working really well as we've managed to have sex for about an hour each day for the last two days. I tried to sneak a few quickies in there too, but hubby has really been against quickies lately for whatever reason. Anyhow, I feel so much happier now. I'll probably have to find a way to get to the gym earlier or sacrifice a day here and there. Thank you!! via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aDh65r

4 year old stung by stingray

My (35m) daughter was stung by a stingray and I don’t know how to reassure her, here’s the story: Our 4 year old daughter was stung by a stingray when I was playing with her in the surf on vacation this past week. She was in immediate pain and screaming hysterically, but we had no idea what happened! I quickly scooped her up and we saw the blood on her ankle and thought she must have stepped on a sharp shell. But the crying and screaming did not stop; assumed she was hysterical because of the blood and continued to try and calm her down to no avail. Poor thing. Said she wanted to go get PJ’s on and get in bed. 2 hours later she was still very upset, alternating crying and hyperventilating. We were finally able to get a good look at it again and her whole ankle was swollen and bruised. At this point we thought she rolled it or even broke her ankle. Packed her up for a trip to urgent care. When nurse saw it she immediately guessed it was stingray, based on looks of cut, location, and the situation (we were playing in the surf). Only thing that helps is putting it in hot water. Within 10 seconds of submerging her foot she was a different person, an hour later we were home, and the next day she was running around with no problems.Long story short, she is now (understandably) scare of going back into the ocean. Thankfully that was our second to last day of vacation, but as far as next time goes…. I feel terrible that we let her suffer for so long, not knowing it was a stingray. And secondly I’m looking for advice on how to reassure that this very, very likely will never happen again. She is the first person I know to ever be stung. So how do you provide a reasonable explanation and also support to a child her age? She is amazingly strong and mature and sure handled it like a beast. With how much she loves swimming, I want to reassure her that the ocean is (mostly) safe. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ax4cmU

What just happened? Am I overreacting?

Hey guys! I know I should probably post this in "relationships" but I'm so paranoid that someone might see it. Help me piece this together, will ya?My daughter just turned 1 and we had a little party for her at the restaurant my husband owns. We brought some toys for her and her friends to play with at the party. After it was all done, I just pilled them in a corner to bring home later. Well, it's been a few days and this morning I noticed they were gone. After a bit of investigation we found out that one of the regulars (a grown man) gave all the toys to another regular (on older woman) to give to her grandkids.Now I'm on an emotional roller coaster here. I'm pissed! Who the hell does he think he is giving away my daughters stuff? The waitress on duty said that he thought it was all free and seemed so sure of himself that she didn't stop him. I'm pissed at her too! But also I guess it's not that big of a deal. The toys were from a thrift store and we selected those for the party because if they got broken we wouldn't care. But it's one thing if she and her friends enjoyed them and messed them up and it's another that a costumer just took the liberty to hand them out to someone!So I don't know what to do. I have to go to work in a couple of hours and all three of the people involved will be there. I'm not good at confrontation especially right now that I'm so emotional about it. If I say something I'll either start crying or cuss one of them out. Should I just forget it? It just feels like a HUGE boundary crossing and I feel like it should be addressed. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aCSWYH

Bringing Up The Topic Of Guns With Other Parents

A few years back we were staying at my father-in-law's house, their house had been burglarized recently. My 3 year old son wandered into their room, where there was a loaded gun on the night stand right by the door.Needless to say, this scared the shit out of me. Which makes me want to bring this subject up if my son will ever stay at someone's house without my supervision. But how do you discuss this in a way that doesn't offend someone?Since that incident, we stay at my SIL's, who also loves guns. I would like to have that conversation to make sure that the guns are locked up, but want to do it in a way that makes them feel comfortable. Is there a way for that to happen? I can't help but think it will be awkward at best. But it's a conversation that has to happen. Any ideas? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2amvWLJ

My dad think I need gates in front of all our upstairs windows.

Most of the windows in our house are about 6 inches off the ground. My son just turned one and my dad is insisting that we put gates in front of the windows because "the glass might pop out, with enough force." Now 2 of them are double pane, single hung windows. I just don't think the glass is going to pop out. There is one single pane, that is original to the house, (it's an architectural feature, so I guess that's why it's never been replaced) but is it really conceivable that the glass would pop out. The house was built in the 1970s. I was looking at the options and putting a safety latch to prevent him from opening the window and safety film to prevent the glass from shattering makes sense. Obviously, if I opened the window, we would either install a stop or a gate, but it's Texas in the summer and we have brand new A/C, those windows are staying closed! via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aPVTld

Teenage son is extremely fussy about which foods he chooses to eat.

My son is 15. He has always been quite fussy with regard to what he eats. He is very rigid about what brands he will eat and how meals need to be prepared and presented. If we try to save money by buying cheaper alternatives, it ends up being a false economy with as there is no fooling DS. He won't eat it something if it's not one of his preferred brands. We usually shop in Tesco, and he almost exclusively eats products that are organic or tesco finest, which are substantially more expensive than the regular or value ranges. He thinks food from Aldi and Lidl (these are discount supermarket chains in the UK) is "crap". He will also only eat organic fruit and vegetables, and he won't even drink regular milk because he says that the cows that produce it are "pumped full of chemicals". He also obsessively checks the labels of food to see if there are any ingredients he doesn't like. He knows the names of almost every food coloring, preservative and flavour enhancer and won't eat anything that has any of them in it.I am curious what types of food do your teens eat? Do they cook for themselves at all? Also, do you think my DS is being unreasonable with his preferences? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2awxjXK

Speech delayed son

My son is 3 years old and speech delayed. He has been in therapy for a few months now and is doing really good. He will talk while in therapy but outside of therapy he doesn't say much without being prompted to by my husband or I.Today was a normal day we woke up as usual and I had just made breakfast for the kids and I, we all sat to eat and out of the blue my son says "Momma I love you". It just melted my heart, he hasn't called me momma in like 2 years and saying "Momma I love you." Is the biggest sentence he has ever said.He can get away with anything right now. I am so proud of him and so happy to hear him say that and to say it unprompted was amazing. It almost seemed like he was practicing it. I love my little guy. Just had to share, this has got to be my happiest moment in parenting. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2aPGDEM