Friday 31 March 2017

Tonight my child asked to watch TJ Maxx. I spent over thirty minutes trying to figure out what in the world he was talking about.


Was it a brand he saw at TJ Maxx? In the toy section or on a tee shirt? Did he see this show after visiting TJ Maxx? Thankfully he remembered the word "gekko" and typed in with TJ Maxx things became a lot clearer.But seriously, PJ Masks? Either I have been without cable for too long or PJ Masks is trying to make my child a maxxinista. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nGtZOS

My son loves dresses.


My five-year-old son is very artistic and loves beautiful things - dresses, long hair, jewelry, pink. We allow him to wear what he wants, and he has a selection of both "boys" and "girls" clothing. We want our main message to be that his clothing choices are fine with us and he's wonderful the way he is, but I still worry about the impact this will have on him socially. I've spoken to his teachers and they say that at this age, bullying and mean comments based on societal norms have not really occurred to them yet. This is music to my ears, but what about when they are older? My approach is just to watch him for signs that he's struggling and otherwise go with it. Am I missing anything that will set him up for success? Any similar stories? We live in a city in Ontario, Canada. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nGn5Js

Picking baby names, is it hard for everyone?


My wife is pregnant with our first kid, a boy, due this September. We are having a really hard time picking names. Anyone have any tips on how they did it? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2olqelh

How do people afford more than one kid?


My wife and I only have 1 child and have discussed a 2nd. But with our finances now, I just don't see how it's possible. Day care costs alone would make it impossible for me to even continue working. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oqV6NU

My 1st grader is apparently failing?


Okay I don't know where to start. My 7 year old DD just got her report card today. She's never done particularly well in school, but this report card has been a real shocker. She's been with us since right before the start of kindergarten (she is our adopted niece), and didn't even know her colors or how to count to 10 consistently so I always anticipated she would need awhile to catch up. Behavior wise and socially she is thriving and perfect and to be honest I thought we were making real headway with her schooling. She was placed in a K/1 combo this year (which I was told was not due to her skills, but come on), and she moves between her regular and math teacher. So her report card. It's bad. A lot of 1s, some 2s (1-4, 3 = met standard), and a stack of failed math tests. She has nightly HW that we do, and she does well. We read daily, and she reads well in my opinion. She isn't ready for independent easy chapter books, but I would have said she was where she was supposed to be. It says she reads at an 8, and needs to be at a 16. I would have assessed her at a 12 solidly, and am confused. Same with math. I know she's taking awhile to get some of the concepts to click and I work with her. We have worksheets and those 10 frame block things, and what not. She does her homework easily, so if she is doing bad how am I to know until report card time?I'm not trying to argue the teachers assessment, but I am at a loss on what more to do. I mean, I work with her about an hour after school daily. That includes her reading (with me to guide). And up until right now, I was so proud of her improvement and thought everything was okay. So what do I do? How to I work with her exactly. Last conferences I had said just work with her more? That's not enough of a guide apparently so yeah. What does that mean, work with her more on WHAT AND HOW.She has been doing soccer for the past few months 4x a week after school and I've seen such an improvement in her overall behavior/focus/everything, and now my husband wants to take her down to 2x/wk so she can focus on her studies. How does everyone balance school needs and a kids need to run around and burn their energy?Also, her bedtime is 7:30 - is that too early? Does she need more time in her day? She wakes at 7.Please help. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ojwxoW

Diaper changing woes


Hi all!My daughter just turned one earlier this month. She's such a good baby! Total dream. Except when it's time to change her diapers...She almost never cries, unless she's overly tired, or getting her diaper changed. She SCREAMS, throws herself back on the changing table, arches her back, and continually tries to roll away while getting a new diaper.I am almost always the one changing her (SAHM), but she does this for my husband as well. I give her toys, the package for wipes, dolls, anything I can think of to attempt to distract her. She just throws them off the table and continues to cry.I'm at a total loss of what to do here... it makes it so hard to take her out anywhere that I'll have to change her in public (plus the loud toilets/hand dryers in public bathrooms scare the crap out of her). Please help!! I feel terrible that she hates getting her diaper changed so much. :( via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2noxNmm

Clothing wars with your 3 1/2 year old?


There is nothing that I dread more than getting my daughter dressed in the mornings. For the last month the only thing she wants to wear is her Disney princess dresses and a few shirts that have tutu's on them. The same goes for pajamas, she only wants to wear two sets which are Elsa and Cinderella. Pants, underwear, and shoes don't seem to be a huge issue. I know this is a common phase, but it's becoming a fight every morning for her to wear any other clothes. She starts throwing a fit and saying she won't look pretty, and that she wants to be Elsa because she doesn't like herself! I have always given her positive motivation, telling her how pretty she is and how smart/creative she is so I'm not sure where this is coming from. Honestly, this might be partly my issue because I don't mind her wearing the same outfits at home but I feel embarrassed when we go out and she's wearing the same outfit for the 5th day in a row (washed of course.) I've tried giving her choices, and made her feel in charge, but it's gotten to the point where I have to FORCE the clothes on her. Anyone else going through this? Should I try taking her shopping so she can pick out her own clothes? I hate that all of her nice clothes are just hanging in a closet not being worn but I'll do what I have to do. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oIkJcm

How to motivate a lazy son?


I have two boys, the younger one (11yo) is self driven, motivated, always does his best in everything, from violin practice to sports; he will not eat or go to bed if his homework is not %100; admirable attitude; it may sound corny, but I find his attitude in life, inspiring.The older (13yo) son, however, is not as hungry. Although both of them manage to get good grades (B at worst), the 13yo has to be pushed and prodded on a daily basis. He has a tendency to half-ass what he does, from doing homework to cleaning his room, to running.For example, we went out for a father/son run the other day, I could not get him to sprint at 50% of his capacity, the guy just would not put in more than minimal/average effort! Another example: When tasked with writing essays, he takes so many shortcuts, his final piece ends up being shit. He's a voracious reader with spelling bee level vocabulary, and can definitely write beautifully when he puts in the effort, but he seldom does. A third example: He's given soccer drills by his coach, like 50 juggles, 50 ladders, etc..; watching him do it makes me want to look the other way! He barely tries, always satisfied with minimal effort.What I tried so far:Cajoling and bribing: minimal results.Leading by example: I started life as a poor immigrant, and "made it" in all senses of the word. I work hard at my job and at home; I fix everything around the house, from IT, to plumbing, to cars. I keep in great shape; I lift, I run 5Ks and 10Ks etc..Threatening to suspend privileges, but he doesn't have that many to begin with as we don't have any game consoles, and only allow TV on the weekend.How can I get my son to have that fire in the belly? How can I instill that drive that makes you push HARD for what you want and not give up at the first sign of adversity?!He's ok now living at home, having good parents to take care of him, but once he's out there in the real world, with this attitude, he won't make it very far :(Thank you in advance. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nTL8qJ

Neurotypical kid - Seeking Diversity


I used to work as a Behavior Specialist before having a baby, and it's a value of mine to have my son integrated with kids of differing abilities as he grows up. I've found that there's a lot of separation between kids with differences, and kids without - and it seems to be rare that parents of kids with typical development seek out those with special needs. Since diversity is more than just race and socioeconomics, how have you (or how have you seen others) find a way to incorporate people with different abilities into their child's life? I guess it probably comes about organically, someone in your family or circle of friends has a child with different needs and that's how you get to know each other. For example, I know many kids as old as middle school who don't even know what Down Syndrome is let alone knowing a person who has DS. My utopia would be seeing all kids mix, and reducing the amount of sidelining of kids with disabilities. I'm only 2 months into this parenting gig and would like advice - how do you think we can bridge the ability gap? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nEJdEk

April Fools for little ones?


My daughter is 3 and has no idea what April Fools day is. I'd love love love to play some tricks on her, but nothing scary. (No water spraying from the sink, she'll be scared of sinks, no saran wrap on the potty as she's just getting potty training and I don't want a setback, etc)So far, I'm going to bake colored muffins for breakfast, put color stuff in the bath, and that's about it. :(Please give me your best April Fools jokes for toddlers! I'd love to make it a really fun day tomorrow. (And, maybe one or two she can do to prank grandma??) Thanks! via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nTvMlO

How should I choose an adequate preschool in the USA (specifically in CA,WA or TX)?


I'll cut right to it:In choosing a preschool, what criteria should I consider (from most to least important)?What's the median price (most places I called wouldn't even talk about it) for each location?How reliable are online "reviews"? I found most to be of dubious value. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nTe9CE

3 year old having nightmares


My daughter turned 3 in January. Lately, she is waking up around 3am crying and it took us a while to realize they are bad dreams waking her up. She will be in a panic and usually she will ask about a specific toy, and she thinks it went down the toilet. Normally I can calm her down pretty quickly, and she goes back to sleep. But there have been times where it wakes her up for a while, last night she was up from 3-4:30am.Is there anything I can do to help aside from comforting her? I feel so bad that she wakes up so scared, and it bothers her throughout the day. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nrmsmi

2.5 year old humping things?


Ive noticed my two and a half year old has began humping things. His teddy, a pillow, sometimes mine or my partners leg. Is this something to be worried about? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nTa7tZ

Appropriate online chat/social games for tween...?


My daughter likes to play various online web games... just little arcade-y things like agar.io if you've heard of it.She recently started playing a new one that has the ability for players to chat with each other. In spite of us coaching her on keeping private information private, it's clear that she very much likes this chat feature, and we've caught her a few times giving out more information than we're (initially) comfortable with.I grew up in the heyday of IRC and AOL chatrooms, so I'm well aware of how great they can be, as well as how much of a cesspool they can be, and I'm not anxious for her to start chatting with strangers online yet.But are they are options for either heavily moderated or curated chat room or social games specifically for this age group? Or perhaps am I being overprotective in this regard? Any other thoughts? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oHeWE5

Single dad, need some advice


I am a single (new to this part) dad (not so much this part) to two daughters. My oldest is about to turn 10 this summer and switched schools this January when I separated from my wife who now lives about 1500 miles away). My daughter is the type that wants to have everyone like her (working on this), while my advice is more along the lines of if they don't like you, hang out with people who accept you for who you are. I've been a stay at home dad for almost her whole life and so her interests are more along the lines of Pokémon and video games and stuff like that. She's been kind of emotional the past few weeks (I figured it was divorce stuff, but I am thinking it's the time I've been fearing since I found out I was having girls) but yesterday I found out that she has been getting advice from the "cool girls" at school about what to change when it came to her style. She normally likes to wear comfortable clothes and her Pokémon sweatshirt. They were telling her stuff like no leggings with skirts, tighter jeans (she does like her very baggy jeans) and booty shorts (I'm proud of her, she wanted no part of these). I'm a guy and my definition of style is normally jeans and a t shirt but I think she is ready to move on towards more stylish clothes. At least that's what she is asking me for.So my question is basically what should I do.I've taken her shopping and let her pick out her own clothes the past few times we've gone, but she has my style (poor girl). I've thought about taking her out with a friend of hers and having them shop together while I do my daddy duty and hold purses. I also want to make sure her new style is appropriate.Thanks. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nSXpLJ

April fools with the kids?


Hey guys, I have 2 kids (2 and 3) and would like to teach them the fun of April fools day. Have any suggestions of innocent jokes/pranks the three of us could pull on my wife tomorrow morning? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nI1p1b

Absolutely dislike my live-in GF most of the time. How do I move her out with kids involved.


Honestly, I'm fed up with the girlfriend. It's not a question of if, it's more a question of how.Facts:she has a six year old daughter with a bedroom at my house. She is also still paying a mortgage for a house she never goes to. So if I'd kick her out she's not going to be homeless.I have a six year old boy that gets along well with her daughter. He's definitely better off with the girlfriend and daughter in the picture. No question about it.I am reaaallly not into having this woman at my side for the rest of my life. I've tolerated her being there because my sons life is way more normal with her and the daughter living with us and I'm entirely to chicken to pull the plug on this without having a plan to use.We've been together 14 months.Any advice to keep the kids from being needlessly hurt or to soften the blow. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2mVX1wX

I think my brothers child is a psychopath. Need advice please help


This is going to be a long storyMy brother has this 4 soon to be 5 year old that I wouldn't trust leaving my daughter alone with. He does some pretty sadistic things. He hits my child on purpose and the smile on his face when he laughs and smiles about it gives me chills. When he was younger he use to bite his siblings and niece's and nephew's. He's grown out of that stage but now he scratches, punches, etc.Today I'm writing cause it concerns me of what he actually did last night and I'm concerned for my child's health. I just had woken up to make my child a bottle of milk (she has SPD and still is on bottles. As I was pouring her a bottle of milk I poured myself a glass as well and when I took a drink it tasted awful, like pure rubbing alcohol. At first I thought it was the glassed I poured it in but then I smelled the jug of milk and noticed there was a bottle of rubbing alcohol on the kitchen counter that was empty. I got panicked, spilled it all down the drain and started searching up what would happen if it was drank (I'm in panic mode now) I'm not sure if the bottle I made her previously was contaminated or not but she has SPD so I'm hoping and praying that it wasn't cause she would know. I have no proof he did it but I just know in my heart he did. He's a little sadistic shit of kid.Anyway should I take my child to the E.R. So far she's acting fine in her sleep but I'm not sure. She had a fever earlier but I think that was cause to her teeth (she's been complaining her teeth hurt) has a dentist appointment tomorrow. Once again I don't know if the milk had been contaminated earlier or just 4-5 hours ago.Also, my brother and his wife are temporarily staying with us and because they had a conflict with my other brother they were staying with about their kids. So I feel like if I bring this up they'll be devastated but their kid is just too bad via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nrfFce

I got into a car accident today


I just wanted to share/vent with people that would understand just how freaking terrifying it was.I was on my way home after I picked my daughter up from daycare today, on a country highway, and some lady decided to pull out/not stop at a stop sign. She T-Boned me, ran me off the road, and then I hit a truck.All the airbags deployed. The car was filled with smoke. My door was jammed shut. My baby was screaming and I. Couldn't. Get. Out. I admit I wasn't thinking clearly, I could've crawled over the seats, but I was just screaming for help and pounding the windows and no one came.The lady that hit me didn't even have a lot of damage! She didn't check on us! A Good Samaritan came to help us. I kept telling them to get my baby but no one was listening. It was the most terrifying thing that I've ever been through. My baby is completely fine, not even a scratch, and I'm just bruised, but it was horrible.I've never been a great driver, but I had been accident free for two years. I have made every effort to be as safe as humanely possible with my daughter, and it didn't matter. It didn't matter because someone else was in too much of a hurry/too busy texting/too stupid to completely stop at a freaking stop sign and check to see if it was clear to go. My daughter could have died and she didn't even check! Ever! The guy whose truck I hit, which was empty and for sale, drove all the way there to check on us but not the friggin woman whose fault it was!It's just, terrifying. And I'm glad we bought a really safe car. And that we make sure the car seat is seated properly and the right tightness. I'm glad someone was looking out for us today. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oiPmZZ

Childcare teacher overstepping?


This is a new school and we have only been attending here for a month therefore we have not really established a relationship with his teachers yet. Today my 3 year old had an accident at the table during lunchtime. He has not had this happen since he was first getting potty trained(age2)and it is really out of character for him. I walked in today to pick him up and he calmly walks over from the story time carpet. The teacher then proceeds to stop story time and inform me in front of the whole class that he had an accident and didn't even try to make it to the bathroom. I said that's very odd as I turned to him he clammed up real quick and was super embarrassed. Trying not to make it a big deal I patted him on the head and said "no worries little man accidents happen". Proceeded to walk out and get the kids in the truck. While driving home my son begins to talk about The whole thing saying his teacher was very mad at him and "poked him in the tummy" and said he peed on the ground like a dog and something about he should be tied to a tree..... he also said she made him clean it up himself. So at this point I'm calmly trying to extract as much information about who what and when while also trying to make it not seem like a big deal bc he was already super embarrassed and bummed out.Mind you now he's three years old has a pretty good handle on talking can be somewhat dramatic but has never really "invented" stories before. So we returned back to the school with my wife and I went straight to administration only bc the teacher still had a class full of kids and as previously stated we don't really have a relationship built yet. I very calmly stated that I was informed of the situation and I was not casting accusations but that he had been saying some troubling stuff about it. We asked if we could see security camera footage to establish how much of his story was true and how much was embellished bc this is all very new territory for us. They declined and said it was a privacy issue. We were told that they would address the teacher and then admin would follow up with us. We said thank you and began to leave and I said I hope we don't have to worry about retaliation and we were assured that their teachers would never.... I honestly want to believe my kid for obvious reasons but I'm also scratching my head trying to figure out how or why he'd come up with such an elaborate story. Any advice is welcome! For now I have to try and talk him into going back tomorrow bc he's super bummed and ashamed. He's convinced that his teacher is mad at him no matter how many times I tell him that accidents happen especially at 3 years old. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nmkkeM

Lego resources?


I never really had Lego growing up (too poor). My preschoolers have just inherited a large box of vintage Lego from the 80's. It's a very eclectic collection from lots of different sets. I'm happy to play with my kids with the blocks making simple buildings and straight forward vehicles but I don't know what the capabilities of the odd shaped/hinge/moving pieces are. I know one can make really neat stuff with them but I don't know how to combine them.I know when you buy them new they come with idea booklets. Is there a website or blog or something that has roadmap, plans, or instructions for random Lego pieces? Not sets, just free blocks. More like: I have this weird piece, what can I do with it? Or what does the block that enables this piece to attach to a creation look like? So I know what to hunt for in the pile. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oF3s3S

Did anyone hate their fence as a child?


So I've been in multiple arguments with my husband about fencing in our back yard (we'd be one of the first in the area). Him and I are in staunch opposition, but both of us believe their view is best for the kids. He says he grew up with a fence and hated it, always wished it wasn't there, and that it inhibited him and reduced his independence, and that he doesn't want that for our kids (3, 1, and working on next). I really don't understand this, and never heard of this view before, as I grew up with a fence too and went through the gate all the time to i.e. throw out the garbage or get a stray ball. I think having a fence will actually increase independence as I won't have to hover (among other benefits). I feel like if a physical fence isn't there, then I need to basically be right on top of them and act as the fence. (Our neighbor has a dog with an invisible fence, which is my biggest concern of him crossing that barrier)Our arguments have been very stressful and taxing, and he often will shut down discussion completely, saying he doesn't want to talk about it anymore. He's a good dad and works long hours and I know this stresses him out too. Can anyone help give me some clarity? Did anyone feel like this as a kid?I've got fence companies coming next week to give me quotes (he relented just on getting quotes) Our HOA is apparently very specific about what kind of fence we can get.I can give more detail if needed but am thinking this may be the crux of his issue that I need to figure out -- what reason a kid would think of a fence as significantly negative mental block, inhibiting their sense of independence/freedom. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nBFGXl

Thursday 30 March 2017

Boys in school are slapping girls butts every Friday. School says there is nothing they can do about it.


My daughter is in 8th grade and is in middle school. The boys at the middle school started a thing they call "National Slap Ass Day." Every Friday in Spring, the boys plan on slapping girls butts. It started last Friday and they plan on continuing throughout the rest of the spring.I talked to the school about it last week and they said they haven't seen anything and there is nothing they can do. My daughter, however, was very upset because she said she was slapped multiple times in the butt on Friday. She loves school, but is nervous about going tomorrow because she doesn't want her butt to be slapped. This happens in the hallways while the kids are changing classes and on the bus. My daughter only takes the bus in the morning, but she said she has been slapped multiple times by walking in the hallways and on the bus in the mornings.My daughter has proof of people talking about it on social media. Will that mean anything if she screenshots it and brings it to the principal in the morning? I don't like that my daughter has to be fearful of this. My older two sons are both pretty pissed about it as well, but they are in high school so there isn't much they can do about it. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nFCED1

Finally had the developmental assessment - my kid is OK!!!!!!!


So, about a month or so ago, we started worrying about our kid because she wasn't talking at all, at 15 months. She understood us just fine, but never said any words, and the pediatrician said that by 15 months she was supposed to have at least 3 words. We scheduled a speech/language assessment, and got an even more disturbing finding - that apparently, at 15 months of age, her expressive language was at a 6-month-old level.Well, we finally managed to get an appointment with a developmental specialist to evaluate our kid. The appointment was today. The kid is now 16.5 months old. She passed the assessment with flying colors, proudly demonstrated the 10 words that she knows (yay!), and all of her development is either normal or ahead of schedule. Apparently, her language development is actually ahead of schedule now.And now we breathe a huge sigh of relief and move on to the next worry. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oeDN5s

Logistics question re: serve food, let them eat it or not


My 2.25 year old is a good eater when at daycare. At home, he'll eat a couple of bites and declare himself done. He eats what we eat. We serve him a small amount of everything, we can be pretty confident he'll eat some of the protein, any carbs are hit or miss, and he will not touch a vegetable, but we give them to him anyway.Meals are no-drama. We serve it, we eat it. If he says he's done, he can get up and play, but Mommy and Daddy are still eating, and won't play until we're done. Sometimes he'll come back and eat more, sometimes he'll come over and want to sample what we're eating (the same as his), but some days he doesn't eat much at all.We eat early (5:30), then he goes to bed at 7:30. Around 7, he gets a yogurt pouch, which we find gets him an extra hour or more in bed, and he doesn't wake up starving the way he used to.If he refuses anything for dinner, he still gets his yogurt pouch, but my husband normally gets anxious about the fact that he didn't eat anything, and will make him a bowl of hot cereal, which he'll usually eat half of. He'll still eat his yogurt.My husband is worried that if he doesn't eat anything, then he'll wake up in the night hungry, and we do not want him to think that eating in the middle of the night (or at 4:30am, when he used to wake, starving) is OK.So far, our son hasn't seemed to connect that he can refuse dinner and then get cereal an hour later, but I feel like this is only a matter of time. It doesn't happen often, maybe once every 2 weeks. We're also conscious of the fact that he's currently cutting the 2nd of his 2 year molars, so chewing is a little sore right now.Just curious what other parents do - serve it, if they eat nothing then they get nothing? Do your kids wake earlier or hungrier in the morning? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oesJ8u

How can I help my kid navigate the bigotry she encounters without ignoring it or getting swept up in it?


I thought this article from cracked was actually quite brilliant. It's tongue-in-cheek, but, I think the author is really on to something.Specifically, the author approaches the question of how to speak to kids about LGBTQIA representation in movies. I'll let you read it, but, it was a refreshing turn-about that resonated deeply with me.I happen to live in an area that has a large percentage of wealthy residents, and many of them tend to be conservative. Over the past year, I often find myself having to correct my younger kids (10 and 9) when they come home from school talking about things they've heard their friends say (e.g. "Hillary Clinton stole from the American people.") It's fairly easy to deal with this; I simply tell them the truth and explain that their friends or their parents must be mistaken.However, I also frequently have to help my 14 year old daughter figure out how to deal with bigotry from kids at her school (e.g. "It wasn't bad that Trump grabbed women's p****** because he's famous," and "Homeless people need to stop whining and get jobs.") She's a really precocious kid, I mean, she's more aware of US politics and societal issues than I was at 25. She's also an excellent student, has close friends, participates in extracurricular activities, etc. But, figuring out how to respond to the bigotry and disinformation she encounters has been a real struggle for her. The problem is not that she feels offended per se, but rather that she feels obligated to point out the truth. More than once she has come home in tears because of this.I am trying to help her find a balance between calling her peers out when they say these sorts of things on the one hand, but not being overly combatative or didactic on the other. So far, we've had mixed success. Sometimes I'm tempted to tell her to just stay away from kids who say that kind of stuff when she can and ignore them otherwise. But, I deeply respect her desire to speak out against lies and biases that cause people to suffer, and I don't want her passion to be deflated at such a young age.As I mentioned, I really like the approach taken by the author in the article linked above. But, I was wondering if any of you have had success in helping your kids navigate the "sociopolitical climate" in their young peer groups. I'd welcome and appreciate any tips. Thanks. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oDH2QH

Teenage girl taking care of teenage boys. OK?


My daughter is 16 and in the 10 grade. For several years she has been baby sitting and for a longer period a "mothers' helper". She is now, among other baby sitting duties, taking care of a 15 yo boy who is developmentally and physically disabled. On occasion (not often) that means helping him in the shower. Last summer she helped take care of extremely intellectually disabled boys and girls with ages up to 16. This meant bathing and changing diapers. She was assisting more experienced adults.This summer she will be working in a rehab facility, filling in for vacationing staff, caring for boys and girls who have been in rehab following accidents and surgery. That will involve, among other things, helping them bathe and dress. She will be assisting more experienced adults.She plans, during her senior year in HS, to take a CNA course and get certified, and then to go to nursing school.A friend of hers, who just turned 14, wants to follow in my daughter's footsteps. Her mother asked me if I thought it was OK for girls, 14 and up, to see naked boys who were "mature" (have been through puberty). I said that I had no problem with it in the caregiving context.I don't want to over emphasize the nudity part. That is a small part of my daughter's work and she is always with adult caregivers. However, it is what her friend's mother was concerned about. So my question is: is it OK for a 14 or 16-year-old girl (acting as a caregiver) to see a fully developed 16-year-old boy naked? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2odjDbZ

I didn't realize how little I'd get to see my child with a full-time job and a long commute


I get home around 6-7 and my 5 year old son goes to bed at 8-8:30. That means I only get 5-10 hours with him during the work week, weekends thankfully more.Let's say I get 6 hours average a week, excluding weekends, that turns out to be only 288 hours per year. I'll average weekend time to 24 hours, across both days, and that adds an extra 1,152 hours per year. 1,440 hours, 60 days, 2 months, or in other words not enough time with him.This really sucks and I feel like it is hurting our relationship. Any tips? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ocVSRp

I got to do the Heimlich yesterday


If you have ever doubted the value of repeated, sometimes annual, first aid training, this story is for you...Wife is running late. Kids are losing their shit so I had to get dinner on the table. It's leftover night and they didn't like what we had last night, so chicken nuggets and canned carrots it is . Get the food to the table, head back to the kitchen to nuke my dinner. It gets quiet as they chow, but I start to hear gurgling sounds, it's a sound I have never heard a human make before. I look over, my oldest is acting like he is going to toss his cookies so I run him to the bathroom.I get him in front of the toilet and realize he isn't breathing. I Slap him on the back a few time but nothing happens. On the third thrust of the old Heimlich maneuver, out pops half a chicken nugget, followed by a gasp and a whale.Wife gets home a few seconds later, says I'm white as a ghost, and ask what happened. All those years of first responder and CPR training instantly became some of the valuable training I have ever received.The kid is ok, I think it was harder on me than it was him. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nnCYnp

Weekly - Things my kid said - to share all the things your kids say. - March 30, 2017


This is a weekly thread where you can share the things you're kid said to you that made you laugh/cry/go on a mad rampage.If you'd like to talk daily about things your kids say, feel free to visit /r/thingsmykidsaid via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oCq1Gi

My fiancé was called "dad" by our son for the first time a week ago. Now he can't discipline him because he's scared of losing the title.


This has been one incredibly eventful week. Last week, while home sick from school and work, our 8 year old called my new fiancé his dad for the first time.This was a big moment in our lives since my son's biological father is alive and well but too strung out on drugs to be a parent. My fiancé and I started dating while I was still pregnant and he's been acting as a parent to our son since literally before he was born. He bought diapers for our son with his entire check when we started dating. That's how involved and active he's been.All this, and he still says he never saw himself as a father or parent to Logan (son). So when Logan made it clear to Chris (fiancé) that he sees him as his father, it had an impact on Chris' parenting behaviors.Logan has been getting away with murder over the past week and Chris is usually a great disciplinarian but now he's been a pushover and Logan is definitely taking advantage. Not doing chores, misbehaving at school, talking back to me.All stuff Chris usually handles quickly and now he's letting it go.What's the best way to address this with Chris?Also, I'm pregnant. Haven't told anyone yet. Wondering, given this new development in their relationship ship as father an son, when I shoukd bring it up. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oCtpks

What songs do you sing to your kids?


I have a four month old and I usually just hum the tune to frere jacque because I forgot the lyrics. Or sometimes I'll sing him Vashti Bunyan's Diamond Day, because it's just such a sweet song and I think it sounds pretty. I'll sing that one to my five year old also. What do you sing to your kids? Do you branch out from the nursery rhyme repertoire or do you incorporate some of your favorites? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nDmxFL

Pen Pal For kids?


Hi! One of my 7 year old son's chores is to get the mail. He's mentioned to me that he wishes some of the mail was for him and I thought it might be a good idea to set him up with a pen pal. Does anyone know of any reputable websites that could match him up with someone? I'd rather he not end up writing to someone in jail! via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oCeZRv

No motivation for work since having a child


Since having my son he's 2 now I have no motivation to be in work all I want to be doing is with my son.How do most of you cope working all day and only seeing your son for an hour at night. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2okNyfF

I know now that I'm overprotective.


A couple weeks ago I posted about my apprehension of letting my sons (15 and 8) go for a weekend trip to Chicago with a family friend. I didn't listen when people tried to give me advice, and went with my own method.I did pack suitcases for both of them. I made rule lists and gave a copy to both kids and my friend. I packed meals for the first day, and told them "acceptable" meals for the rest of the days. I requested texts each night, reassuring me that they were okay. I asked that they never take public transportation while there. I asked that he wouldn't take them swimming because it's still early in Spring. They had to wear coats when it was under 60.Well, my husband took the liberty of pulling our friend aside and telling him to just scrap everything I told him and let the kids have a good time. He then told me this a few hours after they left.I'm not proud of the way I reacted. I screamed at my husband, cried, tried to call the friend and tell him to turn around but got no answer. My husband waited until I had stopped having a melt down and then told me he's seriously concerned about how involved I am with the kids, and he thinks I'm doing them more damage than good. We talked for a long time, I mean 4 or 5 hours, and I finally began to see that I can be overbearing. My husband was so far at his wits end that he was about to leave and I didn't even know it.The kids were fine. They had a great time and even learned quite a bit. My friend took them to a few museums and they couldn't stop talking about how cool they were; I never would've imagined an 8 year old and a 15 year old would be so keen to go to museums lol. They had a lot of fun and ate junk food and stayed up late, then their dad encouraged them to tell me all about it. They were SO nervous and mumbling and wouldn't look me in the eye and I felt so bad that I had nurtured this, had made them feel like they had to hide doing things that people do everyday, that wouldn't harm them. Some of it did make me panic but I know that's on me and I know it is now. I just want to protect them from everything and I know I can't.I know I'm cutting it close to being too late with my oldest but I don't think I'm there yet. I also talked to him one on one and apologized for sheltering him so much. I said it was time for me to trust his judgement and would be happy for him to bring friends over, and I'd try my best to stop going through his things.It's SO HARD. I don't think he's up to anything bad but he's so reserved and secretive. He won't tell me anything unless I act directly, specifically about it. I don't mean I want to ger him in trouble, I just want to know about his life and he won't let me in. But I suppose I've done that and it'll only heal with time. I decided to give him some responsibilities rather than doing everything for him, and he actually picked it up fine. He wanted to take turns doing dishes with my husband and I, and he says vacuuming once a week is fine.My 8 year old is no cakewalk either. I usually didn't let him go outside the yard to play without me but now my husband wants me to let him go to the park down the street with a couple neighborhood kids. I actually get panic attacks thinking about it. I really do think he's too young to go without an adult. I'm trying to give him some more independence too but I don't know where to find a balance.It's hard and stressful and mentally taxing but I'm trying. I cry a lot, but I'm trying. My 15 y/o is bringing a couple friends home to meet us after school tomorrow. I don't know what I'll do if they seem like people I don't want him around. I don't know what I'll do when he wants to go to the movies with them or to their houses when I'd haven't met their parents. I don't want to smother him it just stresses me out so bad. But I just thought I should say I know I was wrong and I'm trying to correct it.Edit: I forgot to add I've been thinking about homeschooling them because public school is always a mess and I don't feel the curriculum does them justice but I want to get my overprotective feelings in order first. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nOSonD

Advice: Is my sons PE teacher out of line by making students run until they puke?


Last week my son (5th grade) came to me with the concern that his PE teacher is making kids run too hard. He had them run stairs until the students puke.I ran into one of the other students at a store and asked him about it, and he confirmed that the teacher is indeed making the students run until they puked. His exact words were "I've puked so many times I've lost count."This is a middle school grades 5-8.I plan to go talk with the school to get their side of the story, however I'm wondering if I'm wrong in my thinking. I see no Benifit or purpose.What is the benefit to running this hard? What does it accomplish? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ohTUMV

Fighting while changing clothes


3yo boy. He fights (kicks, hits, head butts) when we try changing diaper or pants. The weird part is that he does it even when he is in a good mood. And he smiles when he does it. I think this means he thinks it is a game.I have tried to be calm and explain that it is not a game, that he could easily hurt someone (which he definitely could because he is big for his age and kicks hard) sometimes when it happens and I an really tired and in a rush to get him changed, I have lost my temper and really screamed at him. This results in him putting his hands over his face and acting sad. Obviously this is not ideal because it makes me feel so guilty for yelling at him in a very intense manner. Once or twice I have flicked his foot which again results in him being sad or sometimes just ignoring it and continuing to smile and kick.How do you convince a toddler who thinks we are playing a game that we are not playing a game? I'm worried that he will do it with my grandma and really hurt her.Language wise he understands perhaps a little less than the typical 3yo, maybe not though. But I do not think he understands the concept of playing vs being serious yet.Any advice? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oafUMf

I need to know I'm not alone.


I've been dealing with a....unique situation, and I just need to know if anyone else has had to deal with this.My son will be 5 next month, and has taken to pooping on the floor. About a month ago, we found the pile (yes, pile) that he had been hiding, along with a towel he used to wipe himself with. He said it hurt, but that's because he holds it until he's about to explode. :-(We told him he wasn't allowed to do that, that he has to poop in the toilet, and all went back to normal. Until yesterday. I found him trying to hide his poop and sock (which he used to wipe himself with). I made an appointment with his pediatrician for this morning.Turns out, he is holding it so long that it gets hard and hurts coming out. Plus, it backs him up, which leads to more hurting. \sigh He has ignored his body's signals for needing to go potty for so long, he doesn't know when he should go, vs when he needs to go. He was hiding it because he knew it was bad, and was scared of my reaction.So now, his Ped. is recommending miralax twice per day to get things softer and moving, and sitting him on the toilet for 5 minutes every hour to reassociate him with his body signals.Is there anyone who has gone through this? Or anything like this? I feel so alone, and my family is keeps saying it's all my fault since none of them has ever had anything remotely similar happen with their kids. They say how bad it is because he's got a problem, and then say I need to punish him. We did punish him the first time. We took away his birthday party. They want me to "beat him" and "blister his ass". :-( I'm all for a well needed spanking, but that won't fix this! Even my childfree family members are telling me these. It's making me feel worthless and helpless. I'm trying to fix this. I just need to know if there is even one person out there who can relate with this. Please? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oA8K0G

Wednesday 29 March 2017

Checking in about toddler meltdowns: wants whatever choice he just rejected


Hi all,I have a feeling that there's not much more to do for this than what we're doing, but I wanted to at least throw it out there to this awesome sub in case brain melt has caused us to miss something.Latest 21 M old toddler challenge (and we can't WAIT for this one to move on to something else) involves this habit: I have choice [x], I express desire for that, I am about to get choice [x], I hysterically freak out and express desire for [y], and then if given [y] I immediately demand [x]. It's consistent in a bunch of different arenas. He has two pairs of shoes; the one he wants to put on is the other pair, always. At bedtime, which used to be so easy, he demands to be put in his crib (night night!!! NIGHT NIGHT!!!), then freaks out as you're setting him down and demands to rock again; you start rocking and then... no, why are you doing that? He wants 'night night'. Couldn't have been more clear about that, people! Then you put him down and he wigs out.I'm aware that I've described many of your lives right now or in the recent past. In the meantime, this is what we're doing: Let him express his preference (within reason, I should note-- one pair of shoes vs. the other, not one pair of shoes vs. strip naked and streak down the hallway) and give it to him once; when he changes his mind, change back, but then the next expressed preference is the one he gets. Change, switch back, change again, then we're done. Tantrum ensues. Ride it out.Our thinking is, let him have some preference, but teach him that there is a limit to this and that when he makes a choice, it results in a particular outcome; these aren't hypothetical questions.Our strategy, about two weeks in, is having no discernible effect.Better strategies? Other thoughts? Brilliant ideas from the hive mind? Or stay the course and wait for the next joyous behavior to emerge, at which time we probably will think back fondly on these days and wonder what we were complaining about? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2mQL2Rh

Tip from 6 years in - start an email account for your child and email them significant events or pictures


I did this on a whim, but it's really turned out great for me because I can look back and see all of the great things that have happened and I have the DATES when they happened (I'm a Dad and not overly conscious of noting that stuff down). Also they will have these records of events and pictures. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nkwRQD

Giving mother-in-law what she wants.


So my mother-in-law is nice and we get along fine, although she's a little blunt and dry at times. We just had our first child and she kept going on and on about how my sister-in-law did this and sister-in-law did that, ask sister-in-law about this, sister-in-law can tell you how to do that. She insisted that we take month-by-month photos with an object to give a size perspective of baby's growth--just like sister-in-law did. Additionally, she complains that she would like a picture of a certain different grandchild but doesn't have one that is frame-able since they just let the kid run around in diapers all day long. Anyways, here is the e-mail and photo we sent her:Mom,Per your request, we took a one month picture of [baby] (attached). We thought a picture with Winston would be appropriate to show his size and reflect our values. We thought showing off his smooth skin would make for a good photo that you could frame.Love, [Wife]Photo via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nkpyIv

New home doesn't have a yard - what can I do with the deck for the kids to play?


We finally moved to a great area with great schools, but our new home doesn't have any yard. It does have a large safe deck they can use. (By safe, I mean, the deck area is built right onto the ground and completely fenced in). Does anyone have any ideas on what we can do with the space for our little ones to play in? I'm worried about jungle gyms where they might decide to jump off onto the wood. Right now they are 5 and 2. We have a small sandbox and play house so far, but I'd love to create a sort of adventure-land for them to call their own. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ohUhXM

Tornado safety question


For all of my fellow parents out there living in tornado country, at what age sdid you switch from putting your child in their car seat in your safe place to using a bike helmet during a tornado warning that is directly affecting my house? I actually posted about this about 10 months ago and we have changed car seats from an infant one to a Graco 4 Ever and at 19 months I was wondering if this is still my best option or if I should go purchase a bike helmet for him? I live in Arkansas and we have a very good chance of tornadoes tonight (always at night...always) and I want to be prepared as I can for something like this. I googled and can't find anything age specific, I don't even know if I can get a bike helmet small enough to fit him at this age.Edit made to specify that the tornado warning is actually affecting my area, not the county in general. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oz44Im

Family with lice


So my daughter is 4 and she was a cousin that lives nearby that is just a few months younger. My Bil and his wife always want us to come over to let the girls play but we haven't been going over as much recently because of an outbreak of lice they say they don't have. I am very careful about checking my daughters hair after she plays with other kids because we all got lice after she stayed the night with her cousin one night. It was aweful so I would rather be safe than sorry than have us all get it again. After that my SIL treated he daughters hair with things like baby oil and electric combs but I don't think she ever really got rid of the problem. Both her and Bil have bad eyes and they keep coming back. We still go over every now and then because they love playing with each other and I just do lice checks after we get home. I have found just one or two on occasion and get them out. It's not to hard because my kid has light blond hair so it's easy to see through and goes through the comb well but it's so annoying. Last week I told my BIL I think she still had lice because when they were over I saw nits and a live bug or two on her and he went home and told SIL and said he didn't see anything when he looked in her hair with a flashlight. I don't know what to do besides to go over with a lice comb and show them but that feels a bit rude to me. My SIL is already mad that I told her husband I think her kid has lice but I'm tired of the endless lice circle. I feel so bad for my neice having to live with lice because they won't admit there is a problem. I feel like I'm crazy but I have seen them in her hair. Do I just stop going over, or try to show them there are still bugs in her hair. Our kids love playing together but I hate living in fear and doing all the hair checks. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2mPWJHH

Frustrated with my stepdaughter's daycare


My stepdaughter is five (will be turning six in August). She has been going to the same daycare provider since she was around two. I think it's great that her dad/my boyfriend has found people he trusts and likes, but I think there are some questionable policies and procedures with this daycare. For the record, I also think she should be in preschool but her dad kind of dropped the ball on that one.I first started having doubts this past summer, when I found out their contract states that you must be with them on a year-to-year basis. If you break the contract before the year is up, they state that they will take legal action (implying that they will sue you). I found this to be pretty bizarre. I'm no expert on childcare, but any provider I have ever dealt with only has a policy that you must give notice two weeks prior to ending the contract. I have never seen a provider require a specific length of time. Maybe that's normal; maybe they just have it in there to protect themselves; maybe they won't really sue you and are just trying to scare people into staying with them. I don't know, but I don't agree with it. I think it's odd. It's not an apartment lease. It's childcare. What happens if you have to, say, relocate for work? Or if you are just straight up unhappy with the care they provide?So, that is one thing that I find strange. Here is another: last week they had the "Paths to Quality" folks coming in to do an evalutaion/review/whatever. They asked my boyfriend, three days before the review, if he could keep his daughter home that day. Why wouldn't they want all of the kids there on the day of the review? I saw this as a huge red flag because, to me, it says that they have something to hide from the reviewers. Maybe they have too many kids for the number of caregivers? I just think there is something very fishy about that. Not only that, but it's not cool to give such short notice on something like that. I don't think it's right to expect parents to have to miss work to convenience the daycare provider.The third thing is that I think these people are germaphobes or something. Recently, my stepdaughter came down with pinkeye. As expected, they sent her home. What they told my boyfriend is that she could return as long as she started the antibiotics. That is what I would expect. That is how my daughter's school does it. But what was odd is that, the same day that was said, the lady who runs the daycare took it back and started saying she shouldn't come back until the infection cleared. I get that they don't want sick kids running around but they should have been clear on their policy. Not only that but, from my understanding, bacterial pinkeye is no longer considered contagious 24 hours after starting the eye drops.Then there was the incident with lice. This has been going on for the past two weeks. Last week, they called and said she had to be picked up due to having lice. No problem. We'll bring her home, get her treated, send her back. So that is what we did. Then, yesterday, they called again saying she still had lice and needed to be sent home again. Again, no problem. They don't want to spread lice. I understand that. Here is the problem: The lady texted last night and said that she could not return until "every single nit is gone".Seriously?? Lice is really not a big deal. I mean, it's not great but it's not as easy to spread as people think. And, especially after treatment, the chance of it spreading because there are a few nits here and there is practically zero. I don't think it is at all fair to expect parents to have to miss work because a kid has nits.Luckily, I only work weekends so keeping her home isn't a big deal. It really only bothers me because I feel, with her age and personality, she can't get used to staying home all the time. I think she needs to be around other kids, staying busy during the day. And this is a kid who pretty much defines the phrase "give her an inch and she'll take a mile". So, if she gets to stay home a couple of days, she's going to want to do it every day. She's also going to be starting kindergarten next year and I think it's very important to get her used to the fact that she has to attend school every day unless she is genuinely sick.So, those are my gripes with these people. I'm mostly bothered that they seem to have this attitude of "If we don't want to take care of the kid, we won't". Maybe I am overreacting or there is something I don't understand, but I don't think they should exclude her over conditions that, while unpleasant, aren't highly contagious. And they especially shouldn't ask that she be kept home because it is a convenience to them. Honestly, if it was my decision, I would have started looking for a new provider the day they asked she not attend because they had a review. Unless, of course, the reviewers expect the facility to be child-free on that day. But I doubt that is the case. Wouldn't they want to see kids there and see how the providers care for them? The way I see it, that would be like me going to work and saying "I don't want to take care of these patients today because I might catch their cold, but I still want to get paid for it".Anyway, I think I am going to start pushing my boyfriend to look for an actual preschool program for her to get into. Right now it really is a daycare, with most of the kids being toddlers, and I don't think there is much in the way of learning going on. I don't want to sound pushy or come across as "my way is right", but I just really do think it would be beneficial to her to go somewhere with more structure and a more educational environment to help prepare her for kindergarten. He always says he wants me to be a parent to her; well, those are my views as a parent so if he expects me to treat her as my own (which I do) then I think he should be willing to accept my opinion on these matters. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ogULxs

How do I turn down an invitation to a kids party without sounding rude


Backstory: when my daughter was 3-4 she was in preschool at a day care while I was at work. This one mom would start conversation with me if we both happened to be picking up our daughters at the same time. I would be polite but I never had interest in being friends. She's in her high 30's and I'm 24 so I didn't think we.d have much in common either. One day during a week the day care teachers were teaching our kids to memorize their home addresses I came in to her having my daughter tell her our home address and she was writing it down. Eventually she cornered me and we exchanged numbers (again I did this to be polite because she put me on the spot in front of ppl asking for my number) Our kids are now in kindergarten and go to different schools so I haven't seen her or her child since August. She's texted me twice saying her daughter misses mine and we should set up a play date. I'd respond like yeah sure let me know. I didn't want to be rude but again I have no interest. Our daughters were never best friends they played together but my daughter never really spoke about her how she talks about the kids she plays with most. The mom texted me last week asking for my address to invite my daughter to her daughters party. I didn't respond. The next day she texted me again asking and I felt bad so I told her. I got the invitation. It's for like 10:30am on a Saturday or Sunday and I really absolutely don't want to go at all. I hope this doesn't make me a horrible person. How can I tell her we can't come without sounding really rude. I don't mean to be a bitch or mean but I never tried to contact her or set up play dates and I'm sure she's probably really nice but I have no interest and honestly her kid was rude/misbehaved when they were in preschool. I really have no idea why she still contacts me or wants our kids to play together so bad. TL;dr how do I turn down an invitation to a kids party without being rude? In reality I have no intentions of ever setting up plans with this women ever. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nvu5J2

My 15 month old is still as clingy/demanding as a newborn. Help!

Teachers suddenly fired from daycare, all details "confidential"


I just posted this on r/legal, but also wanted to see if anyone here has run into any similar issues and could offer insight.My son has been going to this daycare for a while now, and we all love it. He's in a class of 2-3 year-olds, ratio is 10:2. One day (in the middle of the week, midday), an email was sent out by administration that BOTH of my kid's teachers were terminated suddenly, and they're working on hiring replacements. I was one of several parents at the front desk asking questions after work that day. All they said was that my child was not involved in anything related to the matter, and they couldn't disclose any more details until their whole investigation was settled. Then they'd get back to us when they were able to tell us more. A few weeks later, no word, so I ask again. Admin said "I assure you that [child] was not involved in anything that happened, but all other details are confidential". Is there some policy/law protecting that information? I don't need/want to know the names of other people involved, I just want to know what happened in my kid's classroom to have both of his teachers fired suddenly in the middle of the day. Any kind of context. Maybe I'm just feeling that "protective parent" thing, but it seems like information I should be able to know since my kid is still in that class. Even though the issue was taken care of, and I'm glad they acted quickly, I still want to have some idea of what went down.Worthy of note: we've always been really pleased with this daycare and felt comfortable with our son being there. And he's always loved it. This was a huge surprise. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2o7am5i

Weekly- Wallet Wednesday- March 29, 2017


This is a weekly thread where you can share pictures of your children and cute, crazy or awful things they have done. Please upload your pictures through Imgur and post the link as a comment. Feel free to share the context of the picture! If you are not a parent yourself, this is the place to ask us anything. Also, if you ever wonder who we are, click here to meet the mod team! via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oaQ7UV

My 7yo son was just diagnosed ADD. His teacher and principal ganged up on me at parent-teacher conferences. I am so pissed off.


Essentially he's been having issues completing classwork on time and has had problems with homework at home also. We did the questionnaires and saw his doctor and she diagnosed him with ADD Inattention type. He fits it perfectly. His doctor does not think we should medicate him at this point and that's awesome because I was hesitant to do it anyway.But last night we had parent teacher conferences. I was looking forward to meeting with his teacher to discuss small changes we could make to the classroom (as suggested by the doctor) that may help him - more time for assignments, small reminder charts specifically for him, etc. Instead the teacher said the principal was going to meet with us (who I've never met before!) and they immediately started in with the "why don't you want to medicate him?" and the principal was like "i medicated my son in second grade and I always thought I should have done it sooner". I explained that the doctor was against it as she believed that he would grow out of the symptoms for the most part.They essentially told me that it's not that he can't help it (ADD) but that he's just refusing to do it. I told them he's not defiant, he just literally can't focus enough to do the actual work. They just gave me that pitying smile like "of course you'd say that, you're his mom" type look.Parents, I am so pissed off. I left the meeting thinking "they're going to treat my kid like he's a bad child". I want to just yank him out of school until we get it resolved. I was on the brink of tears and I am just so, so angry.I think his teacher is a little more sane so I sent her a message on the school system requesting that she stick with the changes that we discussed and leave the principal out of it. She said "sounds good" so I'm assuming she's on board.I know other people here have dealt with school administrators like this. I just need someone to help me know what to say/do to stick up for my kid. I am so pissed off. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oybhIx

Is there any suggestion if I send my 2.5 years old kid to kindergarten?


My kid is just 2 years old now, and I plan to send her to kindergarten in the coming Sep. Any suggestions you will give to me? All I want is not upsetting her. What should I prepare in mind and other aspects you suggest? Thank you. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2o9VlQs