For the parents out there suffering with PPD, please please talk to someone!

When I had my son 3 years ago I suffered with postpartum depression. At first, I thought it must be baby blues, because it got a bit better after a couple weeks.I was still EXTREMELY anxious over everything. I couldn't sleep when baby slept at all, I was constantly crying, mood swings, no sex drive. I thought maybe because I was a FTM, all parents must go through this.He grew to be about 4 months old, i had no desire to play or hold him. I only did it because I had to- fuck sometimes I wouldn't even do it.When he was 1 and 1/2 was my lowest point, and he was a late talker. The combo of my lack of patience and understanding coupled with his inability to tell me what was wrong made me full blown despressed.Until he was a little over 2, I couldn't even fathom the thought of having another baby. It was so so so hard to decide.In the mix of all of this, my depression almost faded away. It was still there most days, but they were getting better.I got pregnant.I stayed up all night the first night I found out. I was fucking terrified.When I had her, those familiar feelings started coming back. The anxiety, sadness, anger. I couldn't go through it again, I went to my doctor and just broke down. He said my best course of action would be therapy and some support groups. (Antidepressants can transfer through breast milk)Taking care of a baby when you're not depressed is a whole new ball game. I can't believe motherhood can be like this. Of course it's still hard but every day I don't go to bed feeling guilty or sad. I never wish PPD on anybody, it makes you feel completely helpless and am so thankful that I got help.You are not alone, please please talk to somebody (dads too!!!) If anybody wants to send me a pm, I'm all ears. I wish I had somebody to just talk to at my lowest points. Happy New Years and I wish all you moms and dads the best! via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2QCfudL

Our New Years Eve tradition

It’s 9:30pm. Our girls are snoozing, completely convinced that they stayed up till midnight, including fancy drink toast. Starting around 5pm every year, I turn all the clocks forward behind their backs a little at a time. Time for piano practice! Wow, you practiced so much today! Half hour dinner? It’s now 8:30! Well, since you’re staying up all the way till midnight, I guess you can take a nice long bath. Crazy, it’s already 10pm! I make my husband and I drinks and them a mocktail version for our toast. Cue YouTube fireworks celebrations!And now we’re going to have fondue, our real drinks, and play board games. I’m going to miss this tradition when they wise up. Though I admit I’m looking forward a teeny bit to being caught too. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/39yc4lg

My kids do NOT listen.

I bought some Fiber1 bars for snack since the kids are out of school and, ya know, they're kind of healthy. Anyway, this morning for snack I let DD(6) & DS(5) each have one and told them not to eat more than one. Cool. So, I go in my room to feed the baby, and a few minutes later, I hear the cabinet door and crinkling wrappers. As I peek my head out, there is a mad dash to toss the wrappers in the trash. I'm not mad, just relishing in the thought that these little fuckers are about to learn a very valuable lesson. It's glorious.Fast forward, my mom picks up DD for a sleepover, and I advise her to prepare for the aftermath. It's been an adventurous afternoon with DS. After a couple of trips to the bathroom, he has disclosed his tally (3), and lamented his decision. He has also decided to avoid those particular bars for a while and actually listen to Mom when I talk.Am waiting for the stories from my mom.Btw, they're fine. Since they're usually a bit constipated and drink water like a street drain during a storm, I figured a good flushing and lesson wouldn't hurt.Edit because I am clearly hypocritical regarding there/their/they're. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2ZQvCNj

Tired of this toddler bullshit

Just venting here. Three year old has been out of preschool for the holidays, and I'm waaaaay past losing my mind. The whining, the meltdowns, the lying, the disastrous sleep, the endless (truly endless, every single fucking minute) demand for attention, the whole shitty bag of tricks that is three-year-old-dom, I'm over it.The thing is, she can be (and often is) so much fun: we go on adventures, we have dance parties, we cook together, we draw together. But no matter how much fun we have, at some point that fun ends, and it always ends HARD. We can play together for an hour or two, having a blast, my attention totally focused on her, and then the second my attention flags or turns elsewhere, things fall apart. She just never turns off. And no matter how much we give her—attention, time, fun activities—it never, ever, is enough.I'm trying to encourage her to do more independent play, with blocks, puzzles, drawing, etc. But her "independent" play is just her writhing around on the floor, whining for help or attention, while I either ignore her, which doesn't stop her whining, or reinforce the boundary ("You know how to build a castle by yourself, I'm going to finish doing X right now"), which also doesn't stop her whining. The only time we get genuinely independent play is when she's stalling from something we've asked her to do, or when she is doing something she knows is against the rules.My husband and I are on different pages with this. He is an amazing father, and has far more patience for toddler shenanigans than I do. When I say that I feel like our toddler is running the show, he says she's just being a kid. And he's probably right. But I feel like I am out of control in our home, and that basically every day that we're parenting her is just an endurance marathon where I desperately long to reach the finish line. And even the finish line barely exists! She usually takes an hour or more to put to sleep, and wakes once or twice each night sobbing and screaming for us, only to get up for the day at some ungodly hour (this morning it was 5am). We are beyond exhausted, and it honestly feels like our daughter is destroying the family from the inside out.In addition to this unruly three year old, I have a newborn who is straight up ruinous—colic, reflux, horrible sleep. And yet 9/10 times I would take watching the newborn over watching my three year old, because the latter is SO. MUCH. WORK.Ok. Rant over. This has been brought to you by the generosity of a pair of grandparents, who are watching my daughter and baby while I hide away in a bedroom. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2tixims

Finally followed through and didn't give in!

I ALWAYS give in and never stick to a punishment. The puppy dog eyes and the "Please" always get me. Yesterday one of my daughters got into the food coloring & she knows it's only for making play dough. I asked what was all over her hands & clothes and she said she was coloring. Long story short I found the food coloring and she admitted to lying. Her punishment was no Nintendo Switch for the rest of the day. She started whining a few hours later about it & I almost gave in but I didn't! I was proud of myself. I honestly wasn't sure I would stick to it when I told her but I did and hopefully I can keep it up! via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2SHU0ig

Parents who have flown with toddlers, is it possible to fit all of your things into one carry-on?

My family is taking a vacation for 5 days and it will be my first time flying. They are insisting that I can fit all of mine and my two year old’s things into one carry-on. Anything that doesn’t fit in our carry-ons will go in one checked bag for the whole family (8 people).I have practiced fitting all of mine and my daughter’s things into our carry-on suitcase, and I think all I’ll be able to fit is our clothes. There won’t be any room for souvenirs or anything or really anything else.I would feel so much more comfortable with my own checked bag in addition to my carry-on but my family is insistent. Even though I said I would pay for my own checked bag. Has anyone comfortably fit all yours and your child’s things into one carry on?Edit: LO doesn’t get a carry on because she’s riding on my lap for free. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/35clj71

Warm and fuzzies

When my son was diagnosed with moderate autism, husband and I felt lost. We went through hell and back, lots of therapy, speech, and it really was like a team of people raising a kid with me.We went from dealing with head banging, meltdowns and a kid who we didn’t know he was gonna learn how to talk at all to this morning (he’s 5 almost 6 yrs old):S: Mommy, I’m hungry. Me: you can make yourself a sandwich you know. S: okI few minutes go by and I went to the kitchen to find my son putting his plate at the table and proceeding to eat his peanut butter and cream cheese sandwich.S: Mommy, I make myself a sandwich all by myself!There’s no feeling like this. I am so proud of him. I fall in love with this kid over and over again! via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/35emaUR

I think I (29M) truly hate my kids at night, and my wife (30F) is starting to resent me.

Admittedly, it's been aggravated by the holiday experience of staying with parents/in-laws, but I think it's a symptom, and not a temporary phenomenon after observing myself for the last few months.I am a light sleeper. We have a toddler boy (3.5) who wakes up ever night screaming somewhere between 12-3 AM ever since his brother (9Mo) was born. The baby wakes up 2-3 times per night. I'm the one who wakes up every time, because my wife could sleep through the apocalypse, so I go get them and do what I can. Invariably, they want her, and she wants them to sleep in our bed since she (understandably) doesn't want to get out of bed. However, I legitimately can't sleep with a child in bed due to the sounds of breathing, intermittent speaking/screaming in the middle of the night, slurp/swallow sounds while nursing, etc.My wife doesn't believe me and thinks I'm crazy for getting upset at my kids, and berates me when I sleep on the couch, but after being this short on sleep, my temper is a lot more volatile than I'd like. So when the toddler got up this morning, dumped out Hi-Ho-Cherrio, turned the light on and off (waking everyone, including the baby) and yelled that he wants to play right then and there, I just lose it, I'm speaking loudly to stop, trying to catch his attention and move him out so wife can sleep (because I heard him coming down the hall anyways). Now, wife is upset because I overreacted at him playing with his presents from Christmas...This isn't an isolated event. I hate night time because I just know that my sleep is going to be terrible. What can I do? I don't want to wear earplugs because then I can't be helpful at night, and wife is particularly grumpy when she has to get out of bed. I don't think I can afford to see a therapist... What do I do? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/39CHpTQ

Argentina in Mexico

8 year old daughter said "Janey (her friend) drove to Argentina Mexico for Christmas". Hmmm, you sure sweetie, that would probably take a month, Argentina is a country in South America and Mexico is a different country. "Yeah, that's what she did" I remember she has a sister in New Mexico, could that be it? "Oh yeah that's it" Was it Albuquerque New Mexico? "Yes!" via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2FbgS1G

How my 8-year old daughter saved a disastrous night of Christmas tree decorating

Originally a comment on a popular post but thought it was worth sharing here.I’ve been separated from my wife since April, living on my own since July. We have 50/50 custody.A few weeks ago, I’ve purchased our Christmas tree, bought new lights, and have a box of ornaments from my ex. The three of us — me, my 8-year old daughter and 4-year old son — have a special night of tree decorating. As a parent, there is literally nothing I’d rather be doing in this world.As I’m looking through the box, a thought occurs to me. I text my ex: “Did you pack ornament hooks?”“No — sorry.”This night I’d really looked forward to, gone in a puff of smoke, as it was too late to pack up the kids for a trip to the store. My heart is always on my sleeve, and I was crestfallen and stunned.“Daddy, we have to go do something,” my daughter announces.A bit later, she says there’s a surprise in my room. I was in the middle of dinner prep so couldn’t drop everything. Daughter reminds me of this later, says I should go look. Now? Yeah, now.The two of them made me three drawings. My little guy made me a bunch of pictures on one page, including a house and an octopus arm. ‘Cause why not.My daughter, whose EQ has always been off the charts, draws a rainbow for me. On top, she writes, “You are the best!” In the other drawing, a series of hearts that are also rainbow-colored, saying love/love/love/you/you/you (she said later she meant to write I/love/you but made a mistake).I nearly cried. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2ZBVoog

Weekly - Ask parents everything - December 31, 2019

This bi-weekly thread is meant as a place for non-parents and parents to ask questions to the community.Note - Remember that all questions and responses must adhere to our community rules.For daily questions see /r/Askparents via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/39xqPEX

Here are all the ways I was a “bad parent” today

I let my 17 month old use the iPad for a full hour just because I wanted to relax and play Stardew Valley for a little bit. I made her microwaveable mac and cheese for lunch because I didn’t have the energy to figure out a fully nutritious meal that will probably end up on the floor again anyways. She had all her milk today in her baby bottle even though daycare has asked us to wean to sippy cups as they don’t allow bottles in her new room - but I just didn’t want to deal with the struggle. We spent the whole day inside even though it was sunny and somewhat warm outside.After putting my baby to sleep I felt guilty about all of these things. But then I focused on all the ways I was a good parent today. All the kisses I gave, all the blocks I played with, all the puffs I picked up from the floor, all the silly dancing I did, all the “reading” I did (aka reading one page as fast as I can before the book is being subbed for a new one), and the fact that my baby girl is now sleeping upstairs in her warm, soft bed - hopefully feeling loved and safe. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2tfoe1A

Our friends use me for free babysitting. It’s been six days. I need help. VENT

My husbands best friend chose to have elective surgery and his wife wanted to be with him, so she asked us if we could take their two children (boy 7 and girl 10) for two or three days and I said of course. She insisted to leave the car with us and I wasn’t sure why since everything is within walking distance from my house and I had everything I needed so I told her that we didn’t need the car. It would just stand out in the cold. But she dropped it off behind my back and her husband picked her up with their other car. My husband had no clue since I only told her this, and she gave him the key and told him that it was for emergencies in case something happened to the kids.Once we had the kids it all started. My husband works from 4 am to 8 pm so he wasn’t home to help out with it. The favors started. They asked me to bring his parents to the hospital (whom the husband wanted to be there for him during the elective surgery) in the morning, and then pick them up again at night. Each way is 30 minutes totaling two hours a day for the last six days. Then they would ask me to bring them fast food that they always seemed to forget giving me money for. (The parents, not in-laws. The in-laws were really nice to me, always).Their kids are on OTC medicine and when they ran out I had to buy more because the mom didn’t give me enough. I had to take his parents shopping, because they won’t allow them to have their second car and the wife refused to leave the hospital even though places where within minutes of driving. The kids are on their 6th day with us and I’m going insane. His parents are leaving tomorrow and they asked me to take them to the airport even though the mom and dad have been back home but the mom doesn’t like her in-laws so she doesn’t want to drive them. And the husband can’t because he just had surgery.And the kids: the broke my husbands Christmas present and then asked me if I could order them a toy while I reorder his present, they leave urine all over the toilet seat, keep throwing the toilet paper that they wipe with in the trash and I only ever notice it when the smell of poop is so overpowering that I check where it comes from and notice it in the bathroom trash can. I have to dig it out myself and keep throwing it away because I don’t know which kid did it and I don’t want to force someone to clean up poop if it’s not theirs. They ignore me when they feel like I’ve hurt their feelings (such as not allowing them tv in the morning, or buying them fast food). Their mother doesn’t allow them to wear the same clothes twice, including pj’s, and she didn’t pack enough so I have to wash their clothes daily so they have something to wear the next day.They smear toothpaste on my towels, throw their clothes into our living room, hallway, bathroom floors and where ever they decide to throw them after they change. The boy yells a lot. ALOT. He yells every time his sister says something he doesn’t like or when he feels like his feelings got hurt. I hate yelling in general so I always tried to get them to communicate rather than yell. They jump on the couch no matter how often I tell them not to jump or stand on the couch or throw things but they keep doing it anyways, they keep throwing my exercise ball, throwing things at my dog repeatedly until he goes into hiding, they even throw his bone at him. Not give, throw.They keep creating their own accounts on the tv when I’m not looking and refuse to give me the remote. I had to ask the boy over and over and over to give me the remote because I was too afraid to just grab it from him, after the 5th or 6th time of asking he finally handed it over. The mom also requires the kids to shower daily. Once I forgot and got talked to and she had me make her kids shower twice that day; meaning four showers between the kids. plus the one my husband and I take in the mornings.The boy throws food and the sister told me how nasty my homemade food was and how she couldn’t eat it. Their mom buys a lot of fast food and freezer foods. She dropped a bunch of that off for the kids before the husband had surgery but it soon ran out. My husband and I don’t eat these types of foods, so once we ran out of that food we gave the kids our homemade meals. I found the girls hairbrush in our bedroom, caught their son brushing his teeth in our bedroom and jumping on our bed. He took a 5 pound weight I use to hold open a heavier door and started rolling/throwing it down the stairs. I thought it was a child that fell and ran to the stairs just to see him with the weight he took. I keep trying to be patient. I tell myself it’s ok. This is normal. This is what it’s like to have more than one child.The mom refused to leave the hospital and stayed with her husband day and night because he was uncomfortable being alone. He wanted his parents there also and made them stay with him from early morning until late at night sitting in chairs. (They flew in from another state because he asked them to be present during his surgery and hospital stay)They weren’t allowed to use our “friends” car (or any of them, they have 2) so I drove them everywhere. The mom just kept asking for more and more and more and I couldn’t get myself to say no to any of it because her husband was in the hospital. I figure once I drive her in-laws to the airport and bring her kids back home it will all be over. The mom and dad are already home but they wanted to get some rest without the kids so the kids stayed another night.The boy keeps farting and burping and does it proudly. The girl said “screw you” to me while I was playing a game with them as well as my child. She was losing and I was winning and I think that made her upset. When I told her that it was a terrible thing to say, she said that she didn’t know what it meant. I told my husband that I felt overwhelmed and incredibly stressed out, and when I told him of their behavior he says “they’re just kids”.I feel used. I don’t feel like a friend to them. I feel like an unpaid babysitter, cab driver, delivery person, and maid. The mom wanted coffee from her house while she was with her husband in the hospital. She also wanted hot water. Her in-laws made her coffee and she dumped it out at the hospital because it was too strong. Then I made her coffee from my house and she told me that it was way too strong and she couldn’t drink that so it was thrown out too. Then I had to grab more things daily, a pillow, then some shoes, her underwear, his underwear, etc.I admit I’m the kind of person who hates confrontation and hates fighting so I choose not to. My husband is her husbands best friend and I don’t want to do anything that could hurt their relationship. I haven’t told their mom anything that’s been going on or how I feel because her mother in law made the mistake of snapping at her two children when they wouldn’t get dressed so we could go drop the in-laws off at the hospital. The mother in-law told them repeatedly to get dressed and they did it as slowly as possible and just ignored her until she snapped at them. The kids told their mom and she got really upset saying how dare her MIL snap at her kids. No one talks to her kids like that.I’ve been doing everything in my power to be nice to the children and dealing with everything so that they won’t tell their mom that I’ve done something that she wouldn’t like. As stupid as it sounds, in a way, I’m afraid of her. I just want peace between everyone.But I feel overwhelmed and angry at myself for not standing up for myself. I feel like a total loser whose incapable to saying no because I don’t want to hurt anyone.I know this is a horrible thing to say, but I don’t want the children to sleep at my house anymore. I don’t want to do any more favors. After this, I would just like to be left alone for a while. I’ve babysat before but never this long and never with the additional type of responsibilities. I don’t feel like a friend to them, I feel used.I’m sorry. I needed to vent. Thank you for listening. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2srwdZw

Help...me...

We have a 4 year old girl, a almost 3 year old girl and another girl that was due 3 days ago. How the hell am I (the father) going to survive in a house like this... Apart from the need for a second toilet eventually... Also, the wife is trying hard not to be inpatient with the third still being comfy inside her! The other two were both on time. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/37qrh5T

I swear to all that is holy if MIL comments one more time on how much my 3 year old eats I will lose my shit.

Please give me some advice, distraction, comsieration?My kid is 3 next month. She is not overweight. She eats when she's hungry and 99% of the time she eats healthy food. I have given her chocolate and she will ask me to "save it for later" because she is full or not interested.For breakfast this past week she has had fruit and yogurt with some type of low sugar cereal or granola. Every damn day I have had to hear my MIL bitch about how many helpings this child is eating. Keeping in mind, her helpings are measured in spoonfuls anyways.I try very hard not to go against what other adults tell the kids. But I'm not okay with telling a 3 year old she's eating too much fucking fruit! So yes, lady, I'm giving her her "4th breakfast" of literally bananas. I don't care if you told her she's had enough, she can tell me her self when she is full. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2ZClE1E

Who else LOATHS the gaming/reaction videos on YouTube your kids WONT. STOP. WATCHING?

I can’t be the only parent who literally can’t stand the sounds that come from the iPad or the tv when my kids watch these YouTubers! The ones that play video games and scream/yell/comment while my kid fries his brain as he watches for h o u r s on end if I let him. It can’t be good for them right? I mean, when I was his age my parents would startle me away from the tv if I binge watched Pepper Anne for too long.But this. This is a whole other level of nonsense. We’re on Christmas/New Year break and I’ve had to cut him off when I’ve realized he’s going on 3 straight hours of this shit. And don’t get me started on the Barbie ones... I’d rather put hot pokers into my ears than to hear them making millions with each view.To be clear, I also don’t let my kids spend this much time with screens regularly. It’s their break and I’m okay with indulging when they have time off from school. My rule is no screens Mon-Fri and I limit it on weekends otherwise. These are just the type of things they choose to watch and I’m finding myself more and more often asking them to change to something else. ANYTHING else.Okay thanks. Rant over. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/37yxLjl

I love watching the dynamics between my kids.

I have 2 daughters (15 & 14) and a 7 year old son. The girl are polar opposites and mortal enemies. However, they both adore their brother and it’s adorable the way they interact. Normally I would post on Facebook, but I took it off my phone and I’m too lazy to go to the actual computer. I have to tell someone, and figured you people get the gift of my random kid bragging story.I noticed my son’s stuffy had a pulled seam during our bedtime routine and ask the 15 year old if she could stitch it up for him real quick. She agrees to do it and tells me she’s sure to get it done before he falls asleep. (Super sweet that she took the situation as seriously as her brother, despite it being just a small rip in a stuffed animal) I pass the information to my son, and the follow conversation occurred: Me: D15 is going to stitch up Stuffy’s leg real fast for you so it doesn’t get worse. S7 (to me): Thank you for noticing! D15: S7, did you just say thanks for noticing? S7: Yes D15: S7, why are you so eloquent? S7 (angrily): I’m not! You’re eloquent! D15: You know eloquent is a good thing, right? S7: No, I did not know that! (He gets his stuffy back) S7 (still using his angry voice): Thank you! You did a good job! D15 (in her angry voice): You’re welcome! Now go to sleep and have sweet dreams!TL;DR: My oldest offended my youngest by calling him eloquent, and then they used their angry voices to be sweet to each other. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2so485j

Ask me how having a second kid is going.

My husband and I welcomed our second daughter five weeks ago. She’s just started to make faces and do cute things.My husband has been immensely helpful. He’s cooking dinner and I’m nursing and bonding with the newbie. I’m staring into my baby’s eyes and she gives a huge smile. Such a beautiful moment.I happen to glance over at the couch and my toddler is tearing into a package of raw chicken like a fucking wild animal. With her teeth.~It’s been 24 hours. She’s fine. No salmonella. We have no idea how she managed to reach the chicken since it was in the middle of the kitchen island, far out of her reach.~ via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/39rSXcj

Anxiety constantly with 3 month old? Is this PPA? Anyone else dealt with this before?

Hi...I am going to see my family dr soon, but while waiting I wanted to ask if any other parents have had this or dealt with a spouse with postpartum anxiety?I had a stillbirth of my first daughter at 38 and 1/2 weeks pregnant in 2018. This September I welcomed my second daughter into the world, alive and healthy minus some jaundice which required her to be under the UV lamp for a bit.Now that we are home and settled I notice I worry constantly about the weirdest things; examples:-she gags a bit on forumla and I spend the rest of the night worrying about dry drowing-she bumps her head while getting a diaper change.. worried I should go to the ER incase of brain damage-Today in the bath I went to wash her head and the water went down her face and some seemed to get in her nose and mouth and she screamed and screamed; again worried about dry drowing or a water borne illness-the dog licks her.. I worry about germs infecting hershe cries for more then 5 or 10 minutes I start to worry something is horribly wrong.-nightmares every night of horrible things happening and her passing away, from hitting her head to over eating ect-constantly worrying if she has austism because she doesn't always follow eye contact-doesnt smile enoughThe list goes on.Some days we leave the house to run errands and I have actually had to come back and check I locked the doors.Constantly washing my hands numerous times before making her bottlesBarely let anyone else hold her.And yes I did have tons of therapy and counseling after losing my first daughter.Just wondering what other parents thought? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2tcOI3L

My 3 year old won’t tell anyone he has to go to the bathroom. My husband and I are going to lose our minds.

Hello all.My three year old son will be 3.5 in February. We’re into our third month of hard core potty training. He will occasionally wake up from overnight dry and can easily make it 2-3 hours without having to go.Now. He won’t ever tell us he has to go. We don’t let him just go as long as he wants or ask him. We say, “It’s time to go potty” and then we have him go. He will battle with us saying he doesn’t have to go and then void a HUGE pee. He’s pooped his pants twice this week. He will have just peed an hour previously and then poop his pants without telling anyone he has to go, or just going to the bathroom himself (which he can do if a potty is available).We’ve done sticker charts, potty prizes, tiny M&Ms for going on the potty, LOTS of praise, and we don’t yell at him or punish him for not making it to the bathroom.I’m not really sure what to do here. In the entire three months, he’s never made it a full seven days without an accident.Please don’t say, “We don’t give our kid the option of going, we just say it’s time to go.” So do we. But if he has to go in between his normal routine times, he just pees/poops his pants without telling anyone he needs to go.I feel like we should be further along on this for how old he is and how long we’ve been at it, but this is also my first kid so I’m not sure that’s accurate. Thoughts? Ideas? We’re about out of steam. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2QtAELe

Frozen II

Anyone else singing along to the song Into The Unknown around their house. Lol Im sitting here singing while cleaning up my kitchen. INTO THE UNKNOWN!!! 😂😂😂 via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/36bXSMB

Someone tell me there’s a huge plus...

I get so jealous when i hear or see pictures of people I know who have parents that help them with their kids. When i see that the kids go over for sleepovers, I’m completely jealous. My mom doesn’t speak to me, my dad chose a girlfriend over us and she basically keeps him away from his family, and my in-laws moved away too. Even if my in-laws lived close I don’t think they’d help.My husband and I do it all alone. No nights off. The only time in 3 years I was away from my son was when I was in the hospital for gallbladder surgery and then when I was in the hospital having my other son.I love my kids, and I hope with all of my being that this will “pay off” in the future. The hard work my husband and I do alone, I’m hoping we get some big advantage in the future. Maybe it’ll mean I’m just extremely close with my kids and have an amazing bond. Maybe they’ll see all the hard work and understand just how much we love them. Someone please tell my jealousy self that even though we don’t have parents that help, it’s ok because our future reward with our kids will be worth the tough times now. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2ZBAYfb

Thank you to the sweet girl who tried to comfort my 3 yr old son having a meltdown in the grocery store!!

My son (3 in Jan) fell asleep on the way to the grocery store, it was a necessary trip or we would’ve gone straight home. I generally am able to carry him while asleep if we’re in the store but I had to get several heavy items and absolutely could not carry him. As I’m putting him in the shopping cart he wakes up madder than a rattlesnake. I get it he’s tired and fussy... but he was having a nuclear level meltdown. Im keeping my cool as he’s yelling that he wants me to carry him... at this point I’m just kinda going directly to get the needed items and trying to console him and explain I cannot carry him. As we’re walking thru the store I’m getting dirty ugly looks from other parents... zero compassion and all of a sudden I’m “that” mom with “that” kid. We turn into one aisle and there’s a mom and her 2 kids, the older child probably 10-11 sees my son crying and tells him “hey buddy! It’s okay... I’ve been there... we all have... it’s gonna be okay” while her mom and little brother are looking at the toys (yes I totally caved and decided to get him a toy to calm him down). I was just super moved and blessed by her kindness. And my son calmed down. I did take a minute to tell her mom how sweet that was and that she (mom) was doing a wonderful job.As a single mom trying to do this on my own it can be overwhelming, and that sweet simple kind gesture from a kid changed my whole attitude from “omg I’m the worst mom ever” to “okay... I got this” via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2Q8tv3X

Found some sexual drawings my 14 yr old made

So....I have a 14 1/2 year old daughter. She’s always been big in the online community (mainly tumblr) and she’s very open and honest with me about who she communicates with. She is not sexually active (maybe self-sex but not with others). However, she obviously has availability to the Internet, she knows about sex, etc.I found a few drawings she made (she loves to draw) of some anime characters that were overtly sexual. Mainly two guys touching each other’s genitals.I’m torn on what to do. She’s obviously a teenager and they all express their sexual desires in different ways. It’s only going to progress as it naturally does so my question is...should I even bring up the drawings to her? I’m on the fence about pretending I never saw them. I’m not even necessarily mad. Just kind of shocked bc honestly I don’t exactly want to know the sexual thoughts she has haha! I don’t want to embarrass her. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2Qag97b

My mother spanked my son

Tl;dr: my mom spanked lightly my toddler even though I am against it. How should I address it?We are visiting my parents for the holidays. Earlier today, while I was chatting with my brother on the other side of the living room, my son (almost 3), who was playing closer to my mom, saw a cup of water laying around and decided to push it on the floor. My mom started yelling and stood up, grabbed him by the arms and hit him, lightly, over the diaper. I asked what happened, and she screamed at me that my son always ruins things willingly, and he needs more discipline, and that now I had to clean up the mess. I told her that she cannot hit him, she replied that a little spanking has never traumatized anyone. Then I went to grab a washing cloth, while my husband grabbed the child and started talking to him. I was pretty upset, but both my husband and child seemed completely clam about all. This was almost at bedtime, so I went to put my son to bed and won't get a chance to talk to my mom until tomorrow.I consider my mom a good and loving parent, but she was rather angry when I was growing up, and hit me regularly for almost as long as I was living with her. Usually it was light and didn't hurt much, but a few times she lost control and it got quite scary. I remember feeling like I was always the bad kid and everything was my fault, so what she said about my son always ruining things really rubbed me the wrong way.I, on the other hand, am extremely soft as a parent, a lot of people consider me too weak, and maybe they are not totally wrong. I never get really mad at my son, it just doesn't happen to me. I talk to him about what is right and wrong, but I almost never punish him or physically restrain him, and I would never hit or spank him. I sometimes do think that he does need more discipline, but I hope that he will eventually understand what we tell him, and reach an age where he gets that some actions can make people sad.Still, I hate what my mom did, and I don't think it's her place to discipline him when they meet only a few times a year. I thought that my mom would be different as a grandmother, but I'm worrying about it now. Tonight wasn't serious, and luckily nobody got hurt or traumatized, but what if she loses control completely another time? What if it has already happened, but I wasn't there to see it? I just don't want her to allow herself to do it to my child. How can I talk to her? I'm afraid she won't listen. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2QdqO1g

Advice I gave to my 18 year old sister, and the advice I plan to pass down to my daughter.

I love you.Everything is going to be okay.Things will fall into place.You will figure it out.Enjoy the things you like now, because time has a way of changing the things you like, of changing YOU.Make good memories, and bad ones too.Learn from each experience, but don’t let the past hold you back.Don’t be afraid to speak your mind.Don’t limit who you are to who you “think” you are. You are evolving, and that’s okay.ALWAYS remember that Caterpillars wrap themselves up, and turn completely into goo before becoming butterflies. It’s okay to be a caterpillar for awhile, and it’s okay to be goo. Just don’t forget about the butterfly inside of you.Don’t stop growing. Don’t stop changing. Don’t let anyone stand in your way. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2Q8xVb8

Screen Time

Just wanted to hear your thoughts on screen time for kids. I know that they recommend no screen time for kids under two and minimal screen time for kids older than two.What is the recommendation of time per day for kids older than two?I know that the daycare probably plays shows for them. So I don’t know how long they are watching there.For my 1.5 year old, she has been exposed to screen time already from my nanny’s husband. And I also use it to distract her at times.I use screen time during diaper changes, feeding time, brushing teeth, coming hair, etc. If I don’t use screen time, they don’t cooperate. My kids are picky eaters. One of them is autistic.While watching shows they do learn new things and words. So it’s not all bad. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2QbzNQw

Schedule for a Stay-At-Home-Parent

I have seen some posts asking for advice for schedules and activities for Stay-at-home-parents. I am a mommy of 4 kids under 5 and also did my own home-daycare. I also worked in a couple different child care facilities. I now just have my own kids and occasionally do some babysitting from my home. I try really hard to follow a routine. I don't follow this perfectly, like, ever. But I do try my best! It has a lot of flexibility, but helps to keep my in line with my cleaning and spending quality time with the babies. I thought I would share this and it may help SOMEONE! Good luck in all your parenting- you all are doing an amazing job!6:00 AM: Wake Up, Make Coffee, Read E-mails, Review Day6:15 AM: Get Ready6:30 AM Read a book, Study, etc.7:30 AM Wake kids, Change and Dress kids, Get Breakfast (Turn on a show or music)8:00 AM Do Morning ChoresMONDAY: BathroomBathroom GarbageClean Counter, Sink and MirrorClean ToiletClean Shower/Tub (Check Liner)Shake Out RugCheck Supplies are Stocked (Write on “Shopping List” if Something is Needed)TUESDAY: BedroomsBedroom GarbagesTidy Nightstands and DresserRemove Sheets and Febreze MattressClean MirrorsPick Up Floor/ClutterWEDNESDAY: KitchenKitchen Garbage & RecycleAll dishes washed and put awayReplace Drying MatWipe Everything DownClean SinkOrganize Fridge and CupboardsTHURSDAY: Floors and LaundryFloorSweep, Vacuum, and MopLaundry RoomWipe Down EverythingEmpty GarbagesFRIDAY: Front RoomFront Room GarbagesTidy Dining Room Tables and End TablesLaundry TimeChore Catch Up TimeHoliday Decorating/Home DecoratingSATURDAY: Front Yard & CarsSUNDAY: Backyard & Planning9:00 AM: Finish Chores, Play with Kids, Free Time10:00 AM: Fun Activity or Circle TimeIdeas: Children's Museum, Park, Playdate, Library etc.Circle Time: Calendar, Read a book, Learn a letter, Learn a number, Sing SongsKid's Music and Movement (exercise): I use a playlist on Spotify for this- super fun to do!11:30 AM: Learning TimeArt, Math, or Science, etc. Activites (i.e. play dough, slime, coloring, experiments, puzzles, games, etc)12:00 Noon: Make Lunch12:30 PM: NaptimeTuesday & Thursday: Laundry TimeMonday & Wednesday: Study TimeFriday: Holiday Decorating/Home DecoratingWeekend: Relax if caught up on all chores and homework2:30 PM: Wake Up and Snack3:00 PM: Free Play or Outside PlayOutside Daily Chores:MONDAY:Front Yard Watered & WeededTUESDAY:Backyard Watered & WeededWEDNESDAY:Water Gardens and Needed GrassTHURSDAY:Sidewalk Grass Watered & WeededFRIDAY:Trim PlantsSATURDAY:Mow Front YardMonthly Maintenance to FrontyardSUNDAY:Mow BackyardMonthly Maintenance to Backyard5:00 PM: Run Weekly or Monthly Errand6:00 PM: Start Dinner & Start Load of Laundry6:30 PM: DinnerClean up ALL of Dinner- LEAVE NOTHING OUT!7:00 PM:Switch LaundryFree TimeMONDAY:Pet CareTUESDAY:Replace Sheets on BedsWEDNESDAY:Monthly Chore7:30 PM: Bedtime RoutineBath, Snack, Teeth, Book, Music, ‘Night8:30 PM: Free Time and/or Study Time10:30: Bed Time via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2F8n4Ys

No rest for the wicked.

Edit: Once I do get my beeb down for sleep at night she will sleep 4 sometimes 5 hours uninterrupted. She does wake up sometimes but is able to soothe herself back to sleep. So I know she's capable of self-soothing. It just seems like she doesn't want to 99% of the time.I have a 7 week old (5 week adjusted because she was 2 weeks early) that has recently decided that she will NOT be sleeping in her crib without me spending hours trying to get her down. What used to take me half an hour has now turned into a 2 hour ordeal. She doesn't like to sleep unless on someone.. I have to rock her to sleep and quietly transport her to her crib after a while.Her bedtime has always been a strict routine and up until now she took to it very well. I will, however, add that I just transitioned her from bassinet to crib. She does sleep on me during the day because otherwise she will not sleep. I don't want her to get into sleep debt because I've been told that's super hard to fix. I also do not believe in crying it out. At all. I don't think a 5 week old should be crying it out, she's far too young for that, in my opinion. Advice is welcome. I've been obsessing over this non stop. I just really want my daughter to have a strong foundation for good sleep and I'm terrified of screwing it up for her. Plus, I'm physically and mentally exhausted. Send help. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2ZC7BJz

At what point did you allow/introduce gaming?

Quick background on myself. 35 male who grew up playing video games. I started with my dads Pong system and then was gifted a Nintendo for Christmas one year from my grandparents. Not sure on the year but probably '92, '93? ( I seem to correlate that with the Jay's winning the series).Around the same time I was heavy into baseball for the above reasons and played alot during the summer in various little leagues.Last night we had our neighbors over. Their son is 9 and has been playing games for a while. We had built a super awesome blanket fort in our basement and my son, 4, wanted to show him. They play really well together so we let them go to the basement by themselves. After about 40min I go down and see that the neighbour's son was on my PC playing Minecraft. Aside from not liking the fact he just jumped on my PC without asking he also just introduced our son to video games.Up until this point the most thought I had on the subject was delay it as long as possible. Get him into sports first and then gaming. The reasoning behind this was from my first hand experience with gaming and how it changed my behavior as a kid. Keep in mind in the 90's video games were not as addicting as some of the gameplay loops you see in modern games. I went from playing baseball all the time to being sheltered inside 4 hours at a time getting no exercise. I started to struggle to find motivation to do well in school and finish my homework. Etc etc. So what was addicting to me then I think could be far worse now. I realize a lot of this could be contributed to how my parents handled it with me but I do want to make sure I'm giving my son the best chance in school and social life. Where is the balance with kids now a days?I will say a few good things came from my gaming. I learned to program fairly young. In high school I made myself a simple top down shooter ala 1942. That programming knowledge helped me grasp PLC programming very easily in College. I also learned to model in 3D using 3d Max that I used to make some Unreal Tournament maps. That didnt really translate to what I do now but that almost had me go down that path for a career. That was just me though. His experience could be better or worse.What I could really use is some horror stories or lessons learned from your own kids to help me make decision. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2tju16s

“I left my kids in the snowbank all day and they were fine”

So my grandmother came to visit the other day and made a comment about keeping up with my 16 MO daughter. “Ya it’s pretty exhausting” I said. And then this gem of parenting advice came out:“I know parents these days don’t like to leave their kids in play pens. When your mom and uncle were babies I used to put them in the playpen and leave them in the snowbank all day. I mean you know I’d go out and check on them sometimes and make sure they were ok but that’s just how we did things”.Ummmmmm thanks for the....parenting advice?Lol I should also mention we live in Canada. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2MFqCp8

Fuck the holidays

Oh my God they don't stop. They ask for the TV to be turned on, then they play something else. They get and go where they want, they want to just watch and stand right where I am.I get it, it's 'sweet' but holy God is it annoying. They don't stop. From the moment they wake up it's constant noise, constant need for supervision, constant fighting. They finally get in bed and it's another hour or two of them yelling at each other from their bed room. The only time that I have for quite and relaxation is maybe 3 hours when they're asleep and before I go to sleep. Then, as soon as they're up (7-8am) same shit again. All day. It just repeats.We can have a terrible day, the kids cry all day and are beyond difficult, they finally go to sleep and then it's the same shit all over again. They don't learn and don't realize how fucking difficult they can be.Maybe you all have more patience than I do but there's basically no enjoyment from this at all. It's a thankless job that just sucks the fun and enjoyment from your own life.I can't wait to go back to work and be able to escape for the majority of the day. This shit makes me just want to run away. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2ZGvtvM

It always makes me happy when the cashier plays along

You know what i mean. When you go to pay at a store and your kiddo wants to do it for their new toy or candy or whatever. You give the kiddo the money and depending on their age, hold them up to the cashier to hand it to the cashier, directing them. Sometimes the cashier takes the money and gives you the receipt and the change and your bag and sometimes the cashier ignores you and gives it to your kid which makes them feel grown up. you tell your kid to say thank you and they do in their toddler voice (if they are a toddler like my youngest is).So if you're in retail and you play along, thank you. Makes us walk out of the store with a smile on our faces. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/36dYAc0

Weekly - Stories from the week/end - December 30, 2019

This weekly thread is meant as a place to share stories that happened to us as parents over the weekend. Share good, bad, fun, not fun, etc. Also, if you ever wonder who we are, click here to meet the mod team! via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2Fi1PUh

What things are necessary?

So I found out a couple weeks ago that my husband and I will be having our first baby (yay!), and I am very overwhelmed by everything that it seems we need for our future child. What do you think is necessary? What can we buy cheap? What is necessary to buy nice? What can we skip on and not purchase? Any additional tips would be greatly appreciated! via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2rJjNvE

Anxiety in children and teens

I have this theory that nowadays, children and teens are more likely suffering from anxiety, panic attacks and social fears because of the lack of real life scenarios that are fear inducing.Maybe, I am wrong but I do not remember my friends in childhood to have those issues, at least not as many as are heard of today. We were scared about real life situation whereby we had to run out of fear from neighbours that were ready to smack you across the face. Or because it was dark and you had to pass a graveyard. Or you knew you were going to get your arse kicked after school and there was no parent pick up after school.It makes sense to me that the way we parent our kids, brought up in this bubble, means that the brain releases adrenalin just randomly. Maybe, it has to release this adrenalin but does so in unlikely situations.Any thoughts? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2MEQLEI

Question for moms from a mom-to-be.

Hello! So I have a request/inquiry for the mother community here. I am twenty eight and expecting my first child (a daughter) exactly one month from tomorrow! I worked my last day on Friday and am fortunate enough to have this last month off to prepare - emotionally, logistically, sartorially, etc. I’m planning on being aggressively intentional with this last month of pregnancy - basically I’ve created a daily regimen for myself full of reading, sewing baby clothes, working on some personal goals and really utilizing weekends and evenings for fun activities with my boyfriend, things we probably won’t be able to do once our baby’s here. But all this of course is planned from the perspective of someone who is merely imagining what parenthood is going to be like. So I was wondering if any mothers on here had some ideas on how they would spend their last month before parenthood. It could be something tiny or very very large, kooky or entirely logistical - I’m just curious to know what you all would do with this time if you were pre-parenthood again! via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2Q5S55v

Facing the worst nightmare of our lives with my teen. Need advice.

The night before Christmas Eve, my 16 year old daughter dropped a bomb on my husband and I. My brother, her uncle, had raped her three times over a week period. She had stayed at her grandmothers house over spring break. My brother resides there. Or did as of the last couple days. My mother kicked him out for obvious reasons. I reported it the moment she told us. We chose to report at home so she was more comfortable. As of right now he has not been arrested and the detective that is supposed to call, has not as Tonight. We are using winter break to set her up in therapy. Besides therapy and a good support system, what can I do for her so she doesn’t feel alone or that she isn’t getting justice because he has not been arrested? This is by far the hardest thing she will ever deal with in life, I don’t want to do or say anything wrong that could possibly make her worse. I don’t know what I am dealing with or what the future holds.I just want to help my child to get through this.HELP!!! via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2ZG7nB9

Asked my son what he wanted for his birthday.

My young son has a birthday coming up. I’m strapped for cash so I asked him if there was anything I could do for him that wouldn’t require any money. He flat out, calmly told me he wants me to stop ignoring him so much.Backstory - I have a breastfeeding new baby and I have been a SAHM this past year. It would be fair to say I’ve been pre-occupied but not completely negligent in balancing everything.I’m mad at myself for letting it get to this point but at the same time I’m glad I asked this question because it brought me back to reality. Huge slap in the face to wake up. Money- it is NOT everything. Yeah he loves his electronics and toys, etc but he obviously wants and needs a real connection with his mother. Just wanted to share this personal moment and message with other parents. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2F6xffX

5 y.o obsessed with moms feet

So heading is pretty straightforward. His obsession has ebbed and flowed since I started noticing it around two years old.Af first I thought it was cute, however around three or so I noticed that his penis would get erect and he would try to rub his penis on my feet.I’ve had the “mommy is uncomfortable when you do that” talk multiple times. All while not trying to make him feel ashamed or hurt.Over the last few months when I’ve caught him setting up (he’ll start taking off his socks if he sees I’m not wearing mine) I’ll say “it not feet time”. Of course I know “feet time” shouldn’t even be a thing, but he’s been really pulling at my heartstrings this winter break. He’ll snuggle up to me, pout and ask “can we please have feet time?”I just🥺.I’m pretty convinced that we may need to see a child therapist but with one kid already dealing with major speech issues, it’s going to be a bit much.Any advice or positive feedback is welcomed. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/353TpKB

I feel bad for telling my son "I cant play right now."

My son is 4. He is very roudy and energetic, which is fine. I like going outdoors and running around, going to the park, the playground. We do this nearly every day depending mostly on weather. At home he is always wanting me to play with him and 80% of the time I dont hesitate to say yes. But in the evenings I'm feeling so exhausted and sometimes I just need to rest for an hour or so. I also have a 9 month old son who's teething at the moment, has an ear infection and RSV. I just sat down, put the baby down for a rest and I just want to sit and do nothing for a moment when my 4yr old starts yelling "PLAY WITH ME!" I tell him we just need to relax for a little while and sit down and he cries and says "I'm having a terrible night! Why won't you play with me? Why are you angry at me!" It seriously tears me up. I try so hard not to ever raise my voice or come across as angry, it's just not one of my personality traits, I'm a pretty relaxed laid back person. Is he saying these things to make me feel guilty as a way of manipulating me?! At 4yrs old!? He is aware we've played literally all day, he's aware that I am not 'angry' at him. I don't know why he uses this language with me. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/359AFco

Unruly 7 year old

Hi everyone. Ive no idea if this is the right sub for this but lets give it a go.TLDR; I’m a caregiver for my autistic nephew but the brother (same age) is so bad its affecting my motivation to keep doing my job. Talking to parents hasnt helped. What can i do?This might be a bit long so bear with me, this is about my 7 year old nephew. Backstory: my older sister got remarried to a man who is much older than her and both already had children from their previous marriages his son is now 16 her daughter is now 12. Shortly after they got together she gets pregnant and has his baby. After a couple of years she finds out that right before she got pregnant that he had gotten another woman pregnant a couple months prior (pretty sure the BM reached out to my sister and the kid looks just like my brother in law). BM is bat shit crazy and abused the kid so fast forward about 4 years and my sister and her husband have to take the kid into custody. Heres where my question starts, the “new” son has very low functioning autism (which i truly believe if he had the right care sooner he would at least be verbal) and has taken up a TON of the attention with therapists dr appts etc etc. Keep in mind both of the little boys now are the same age with just a couple months between them. I’m very involved because i am now a caregiver for the autistic one BUT the other boy is SO bad. My whole family has tried to bring it up to the parents about how bad he is (wont listen throws screaming fits is disastrous) and my sister gets VERY defensive over him. The husband cant even do anything about it because she gets so mad. I caught the boy flipping me off once and he throws his electronics and breaks things when hes mad. And the main reason for this behavior (i believe) is that he was introduced to electronics and such at too young of an age. I also understand jealousy plays a main part in this too but this behavior has been going on and only getting worse for the last few years. Its so bad that the autistic boy is starting to pick up and learn from him and it makes things way harder on me. I’m scared about how the unruly boy is going to grow up but have no idea how to approach the situation or if i even should. This post doesnt even help describe how bad he is but i’m trying to keep it as short as i can.Does anyone have any advice as to what i could do when the parents arent around? Ive tried being very nice to him and have also tried reprimanding him (by taking away his switch or tablet etc never spank cus thats not my place) and that just makes things soooo much worse. I really enjoy being a caregiver but i cant keep doing it if the unruly kid wont change. ANY advice is welcomed. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/368kzB3

1 year old cries a lot and throws tantrums - Is this normal?

Our baby is nearly 1 year old. It's the first for my wife and I so we don't really know what is normal and what's a sign for concern.Our baby used to be pretty easy going up until about 6 months or so. The first issue was with the car seat, where one day she decided she hated it and from then on she would scream and put her feet down and arch her back to not let us put her in the seat. She usually cries and screams until she falls asleep.A month or two later it was bathing where she would cry and scream. Then she decided she hated putting on clothes. Then she started hating being put into her stroller. Now it seems like almost everything we do she cries and throws a tantrum. It's not every time with everything, but I'd say with things like the car seat and stroller she'll cry 100% of the time, but things like bathing and putting on clothes it's like 50/50. Putting her on my wife's breast will immediately calm her down, and also if you distract her with something to play with she'll usually calm down immediately, but it requires constant distraction or she'll start screaming again.Is this normal for a 1 year old? If so, when does it usually get better? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/35dI3DW

Grandparents in town to "help" with newborn, now we're parenting everyone

Been lurking on these forums for awhile and just needed to vent. We had our second this week, and all four grandparents have come to town to "help out" with the baby as well as our daughter (4yo).In the space of a week, they've let our daughter get sick, totally broken her routine, given her sweets with no thought to healthy food, and failed to take her to any of the normal, delightful play places that we recommended. They don't cook, they're too anxious to hold the baby, they give terrible advice from their parenting era of the 1970s/1980s (YIKES), and they pester my wife with invasive and inappropriate questions about her body.They did help out with cleaning and I appreciated that, but I swear, when they come to town I just feel like I have six kids instead of two. Each of them is helpless in their own special way, and it doesn't seem to matter how clearly and concisely we lay out things like schedule, meals, and activity options for our 4yo -- they just throw it out the window and do what they want.This afternoon we finally got home from the hospital only to find out that they hadn't even left the house with our daughter all day. They kept a 4yo cooped up at home all day! Who are these people?Ok, rant over. I know, I know, I should be grateful we have all this family and I do love them. And our daughter loves them too. But sometimes I wish they'd put some real effort in. They're constantly complimenting us on our parenting, and not to brag but they're right to do so -- we're good parents. So why are they so resistant to following our lead when they say that's what they want to do? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2F36w3Z

Toddler milk sippy cup through TSA?

We had a clear 16oz sippy cup of whole milk for my DD ( 2.5 yrs old) to drink during flight. A TSA agent said that she would make an exception this time, but milk would have to be discard at TSA next time. The TSA agent said that they expect 2-year-olds to take airport food after the TSA check points. Is there a written policy that milk can’t be brought through TSA and the age limit?Of course I don’t mind dumping out the milk, and get milk refills at Starbucks or something after TSA. But that costs money and time to get in line. I don’t mind opening the cup for them to check the milk at TSA. But I understand that empty cups would speed up the TSA process a bit. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2ZE1tRc

4 yo’s are weird.

My 4yo son was THRILLED to have his bunk bed setup again (we moved) but once we told him to climb up for nap he screamed bloody murder about climbing up since it was “too high”. It’s only been a short amount of time since he has used it. Once he got up,after about 10min of screaming,he laughed and said wow that was easy.... anyway hoping it can give someone else a good laugh. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/3531aQJ

Karma

As my daughter stands on the bed looking at herself in the mirror and making up stories and doing performances, I am reminded of myself standing on my mother’s bed and telling her stories about my doll while she does her make up and says “mm” and her telling me I was “talkative”. I thought it was a compliment. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2SBcNfe

DH doesn’t seem to like parenting

Lately it seems like my husband (38m) doesn’t actually like being a parent. He’s been getting on the kids nonstop it seems, mumbles under his breath “assholes” or something similar daily. It’s wearing on me hearing him and seeing him be annoyed 90% of the time. Besides having my own issues with him, it makes it seem like maybe separating and being 50/50 would make him happy? I don’t want my kids growing up thinking they’re a constant annoyance to be around because they aren’t. Yeah they can get rambunctious, but they’re kids and it’s the holidays. Would love some input on this... via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2SCdq8v

Perfect amount of time to have another child.

So i am just wondering what is the best age gap for children. We want to have another child, we currently have a 6mnth old, but dont know how long we should wait. Ive heard people say wait until your first is potty trained, but then ive heard do it sooner because its easier when they are closer in age. So i want reddit peeps opinions., examples, and advice. Thanks via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/36epalC

How on Earth do people manage to do it all?

I feel like I’m drowning! I can’t keep my house clean- I spend all of my cleaning time on basic maintenance like laundry, dishes, garbage, fold the clothes, put the clothes away, change the toilet paper rolls, wipe down the counters. By the time those very basic things are done I have no time or energy to sweep, mop, vacuum, organize, dust, clean showers, ect. Plus you have to play with the kids, not too much tech or tv time, make each kid feel like your meeting their individual needs, read to them, help them with art (and clean that mess up) buy them everything they need, sports and practice, can’t miss a game, keep the car clean, yard maintenance, give the dog a bath. All while working full time and giving my job everything it needs. I’m a school nurse and every kid that comes in I try to make feel heard and taken care of. I seem to have no patience for my own kids at the end of the day. How do people manage to do all of those things? I feel like I’m in too deep with no life vest. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/366ROop