I have never used the internet to discuss my personal parental drama, but I have been crying so hard for the past couple of days that I need a place that my family won’t read to get this off of my chest.Back story: I am a 25 year old F that is currently 21 weeks pregnant with my husband and I’s first child. This weekend I will be graduating from college with my bachelors degree that took me 7 years to earn (transferring multiple times and switching degrees to blame for extended time). I also got accepted to a doctor of physical therapy program that I will be attending after my year deferment to take care of our new born baby. So needless to say this graduation ceremony is a huge deal to me especially because I have dyslexia and was told when I was 12 years old that I was stupid and would never amount to anything or be able to finish high school let alone college by my teachers and even some family.My parents had a horrible divorce that lasted two years and ended in 2015. The divorce caused my dad to go to jail twice, my mom to get a ppo, and my dad getting an arrest warrant for my mom and caused my siblings to permanently cut my mom out of their life and haven’t spoken to her or let her see her grand kids for 4 years. Currently I am the only family member that speaks to both sides of my entire family. It is too difficult to explain everything that went down in terms of who is to blame by their behavior, but they have both been really awful to each other and caused many many painful situations for me. And just to add a cherry on top my husband’s parents are divorced as well because his dad cheated on his mom. They started their divorce the day after our wedding. But are capable now of being civil to each other at events. So they aren’t the main problem.One of the most hurtful things that my parents have done was that my dad refused to go to my wedding if my mom was attending and vice versus for my mom with my dad. Then to add fuel to the flames my oldest brother said he wouldn’t come to my wedding if my mom was there and my dad wasn’t. To get both of my parents to attend and all of my siblings I had to write a statement that had to get noterized and submitted to a judge to make sure that if my dad attended that he could not get in trouble with the ppo. My mom still threatened not to attend up until the actual rehearsal where she did end up begrudgingly attending because I refused to tell either of my parents that they could not go to my wedding. Believe or not I actually still love both of them individually and wanted them both there.Any way fast forward 3 years later after my wedding, which was the last time they saw each other. I feel like I am back in the same situation. I wanted to throw a gender reveal/ small graduation celebration before my actual commencement ceremony getting only family together to break the ice. My intention was that since my husband and I are having a baby I would like to be able to invite both sides to any of our child’s birthday parties or even the birth and not have drama (wishful thinking I know). But my parents are refusing to go if the other attends and me stuck longing for my parents to just support me in this huge accomplishment and make a progress step towards the future for supporting our kid In their mile stones. Currently they are willing to go to the ceremony only because they don’t have to sit with one another or see each other. So it feels like they are choosing by convenience of what they want to do in support of me and not work on being able to be civil in the same room for their future grandchild. I was honestly so upset by their behavior that I canceled the entire gender reveal/ graduation party.I hate feeling like their own personal drama and past grievances are more important then being at a function that supports me and our child. I am honestly livid and angry because they have been acting in this horrific manner and it has been 3 years since their divorce and they are both remarried to amazing people and are in a general happier place in their lives.If you ended up reading all of that thank you. I just feel like a squished bug and am just so broken because all I want is for the people I love to be able to put aside their differences and put me, their youngest and only daughter, just a little bit higher in importance. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2r3LnzY
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