It's going to get better..right? Stepmom with a 6yo with severe outbursts, I am totally overwhelmed

Mostly I need a safe space to just let it out. Stepson is such a sweetheart when he is doing well. I have known him and his dad for 2 years. Living together for 1. No major changes lately except mom has a new bf and school just started. He's in 1st grade.We have a behavioral therapist and we are only a couple of sessions in. We have an action plan. We have submit the formal disability evaluation form to the school for disability evaluation from them. We have a plan for an appointment soon to generate a battle plan for all parents and both households.But meanwhile good lord I'm totally worn out. We went from a few tantrums a year, to once a month, to once a week, to daily. It's to the point of daily battles for everything. It's totally emotionally draining. His sisters are suffering for lack of attention and such a volatile environment. Their relationship with him is suffering, they want nothing to do with him.His tantrums are combined fight/freeze. It's either shutdown stone wall, or total aggressive outburst. It happens at our house, moms house, and school. Some days it feels like everything is a trigger. I'm tired of walking on egg shells. He will refuse to talk or move until the storm passes which can be minutes or hours or even DAYS. Once he's hit a trigger, he's gone, we can't help him out of it we have to wait it out. We have identified some triggers like indipendent work, in flexibility, and difficulty with transitions.There is no context of past abuse or trauma. Dad has bipolar, mom is generally healthy, but has some past family issues.The outbursts are getting so bad that we have to physically restrain him in the heat of the moment in order to avoid him critically hurting himself or someone else. We do this safely in an arm lock/basket hold so as to not hurt him or ourselves. He has thrown heavy toys at guests, sisters, and generally all around. He kicks, hits, fails, fish out of water epic flopping flails on whatever surface he's on. (I'm sure you can guess but we don't invite guests anymore)Dad and I have tried to be sure to be there with him for any potential trigger, pretending he is much younger than his actual age, to hand hold and walk through. Time to pick an outfit for school? (for brevity I say "I" but dad does this stuff too) I go with him, let him pick what he wants from a few options I present. Time to brush teeth? I go with him and we brush teeth together. Time for quiet reading before bed? I ask him to read to me. He asks me to snuggle at bedtime until he falls asleep. The only thing dad doesn't help with is homework - I have background in tutoring children and he responds much better with me.We tell him that we love him all the time, and we give lots of affection, we praise good behavior and efforts. We make sure he knows that we love him no matter what, we make sure he knows we are here to listen and help.I am just so tired. I'm ready for a "normal" day and it's going to take so long to get there. We are waiting for evaluation from his behavior therapist, the school evaluation, the response he gives to the changes we make..It gets better right? I need some inspiration and a virtual support space. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2N3kX9Q