Rant: but desperate for help please! Mum in need.

So I'll try and keep it short and simple. (But it's definitely a rant) I have been separated for a year in January, all communication broke down in October and now we go through solicitors. My 4yr daughter goes to her dads from Friday 2.30 till Sunday 7pm, now for Christmas I nicely suggested that we swap and he have her from 9am Saturday till 2pm Monday (Christmas Day) giving her the chance to have Christmas with both parents. He refused and instead wanted her from Friday (arguing it's his time) till 2pm Monday even though my day. My daughter doesn't seem to emotionally cope well when she is away from me for more then two nights so I disagreed to this. Side note: when my daughter is with me mon-Fri we have routines and bedtimes at dads she eats,sleeps, does what ever she wants whenever she wants. This is especially hard when she comes home and I try and do the right thingSince we couldn't agree I just decided we should stick till normal agreed arrangements which was fri-sun till upcoming mediation in January all emails were sent between solicitors! . Now he messaged me half and hour before pick up and told me he won't be returning her. He wouldn't answer my calls and police can't do anything so I had to spend Christmas Eve alone.My question is (not trying to be spiteful) But if I don't feel comfortable with her going can I just politely message him and say she isn't going.? I can't call my solicitor to ask as she is closed for Christmas break.Note: no court orders are in place nothing. Just a normal routine that she goes every weekend? Like what if she is sick and doesn't want to go.Can I just not send her? Will it look bad on me ? Even though I'm just trying to do right by her? It's not the first time he hasn't returned her! It's about the fourth time! via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2DfpLUY