We just had our first child and it’s been a rollercoaster. He has had some kind of health issues every month (NICU, rash/allergy, torticollis and flat head).On the work front, I just got back to my old job and while everyone has been very welcoming and supportive, I feel like I’m just grinding time away that I can be spending with my baby. I grieve that I only get to see him for like 1.5 hours everyday, only to put him to bed and missing out on so many milestones. I also feel not that productive at work.We have an amazing nanny, but still not everything is done to our liking. And I can’t but find myself getting anxious that I’m not there.But I don’t have the confidence to just quit my job and be a SAHM. I think I will go insane by myself, I’m also not confident I’d take care of the baby any better than the nanny... I think in my head I have this feeling a lot of the medical issues were due to our inexperience (what if we moved his head earlier? What if we fed him differently? What if what if...) I don’t want to mess him up again. But I feel guilty too to pay for extra hand to help if I already quit my job and our income is down.Then we had to let go of our dog because the baby has allergy. I feel like I betrayed our dog.I don’t know how other parents do it. Salute to you all. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2RCKXyb
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