Son Saw Me Smoking

Before bed, once the kids are asleep, I like to smoke a joint. I don't do it while they're awake but last night my son (8) woke up and came downstairs, I didn't see him at first so he saw me smoking for a few seconds. My husband is a heavy cigarette smoker and has been for many years, my son has learned about the dangers of smoking and repeatedly asked my husband to quit. He never saw me smoke or knew I smoked up until this slip up and now I don't know how to handle it. I know he is worried that I could get cancer which breaks my heart. I don't want him to be consumed with fear that I won't always be around because I might get sick. He's at school now, we didn't get much of a chance to discuss it yet but I honestly don't know what to say. How can I save my ass without downplaying the severity of smoking? I wanted to tell him I wasn't actually smoking, holding it for his dad or something of the sort but I don't want to lie to his face, terrible parenting 101. I have always been super sneaky about my smoking as to avoid this situation but now I'm at a loss. I feel like he will be disappointed/ashamed of me now. What a disaster... via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2TlkZRy