Background: My ex husband and I have been divorced for about 3 years now. Him and his wife began dating during our separation and have been together ever since. I share 50/50 custody of our 5 year old son. She has a 6 year old son of her own with a little girl on the way.We couldn't be more different, her and I. I'm an atheist. She's a devout fundamentalist Christian. She's anti public school and I send my son to public school. She's anti vaccination and I'm pro vaccination. She's pro life, I'm pro choice.Ironically, my ex husband is also an atheist, pro public schools, and pro choice. He leaves it up to his wife for vaccination choices.Through all of these differences, I have respected her for her views as longer as they didn't negatively affect my son. There was one instance where my son came home saying he needed to pray or else he would burn on a fiery planet. I don't believe in childhood indoctrination but I had kept my mouth shut on my son wanting to pray and even encouraged him to do what he feels is right in his heart. Until he came home saying what he said. I didn't want him to be scared into religion. I wanted him to believe it from his heart. An argument ensued and we didn't talk for a long time. For a while, I strictly only communicated with my ex husband, with whom I rarely argue with anymore because we have learned to be reasonable with each other week to week. I would even say we are almost friends.Eventually, I began to kill her with kindness because I felt we needed to have some kind of relationship. After several months of this one sided attempt, we finally went out, just her and I, to a painting class. Something we did have in common. It was nice and gave me hope. I also met up with just her and I and the boys for ice cream shortly after that and I felt even more hope that despite our differences, we could keep things civil.It has been several months since the last fight. I had accepted that she had different viewpoints and I respected her for it. I'm really big on communication and made sure she knew this. Based on her responses and/or lack of response, it was apparent that she didn't feel the same about me. I was okay with that until now.My son came home a couple weeks ago saying "Donald Trump won because Hillary clinton lost because she kills babies". My 5 year old! I don't have politics on around him so I knew he either got it from school or his dads. So I asked him where he heard it and it was from his 6 year old stepbrother.I then proceeded to message both my ex husband and his wife about the concern because I can't have our son going to school talking about people killing babies. I figured his stepbrother had heard it from a nasty tv ad or something and wrote the text assuming that she was a reasonable parent and would understand why my son can't go to school talking like that. He brought it up to me 2 minutes before the bus pulled up and I'm so glad he told me before he asked a teacher or child at school.The response from my ex husband was typical, he would talk with our son that weekend and make sure he knew it wasn't okay to talk like that.The response from the stepmom was quite different. She said she was the one who told her son that "clinton murders babies" and that she couldn't control what he repeated to my son. Then she proceeded to say that if I was pro choice, then I was a "baby murderer" too.....I have dealt with so much from this woman from her calling me a bad mom and a low life to now a baby murderer. I could have gritted my teeth and shook it off. But the next part in the text....I just can't stop feeling mother bear rage over:"If [my sons name] goes to school saying that clinton murders babies, then more power to him. At least he knows right from wrong and isn't brainwashed by liberal BS"No matter how much I tried to explain to her that this wasn't about political differences, that this was about what was appropriate for school, she wouldn't hear it. She blocked me. I sent the screenshot to my ex husband of her long text calling me and others who are pro choice "baby murderers" and that she didn't care and even would be proud if my son went to school talking about clinton murdering babies. He replied with a "I guess I'm a baby murderer too".There are so many things wrong on so many levels. For one, I shouldn't have to text both of them the same thing. I only started doing that after I realized that they didn't communicate important things to each other concerning our son. So I fully realize that should not have been happening in the first place.Even though I communicated this with my ex husband who agrees with me, he just repeated that he would talk to our son. I had to tell him that this was it for me, that I couldn't take her verbal, backhanded insults any longer and that I refuse to have any contact with her. This, of course, upset my son. He wants us to be "friends". I felt so helpless when I told him I tried, I tried very hard.I don't know how to handle my own emotions from here. I live in fear every weekend now for what my son is going to come home saying next, or worse, he says it at his full day kindergarten class and I get a call home. I'm already dealing with behavior issues at his school as it is.I tried to ask my ex husband to talk to her but continuously, she's runs the show at their household. He doesn't want to stir up confrontation because they are having a baby together.I'm just so worried about how this is all going to affect my son. They have been raising their children separately this whole time and now will be bringing a child into the world together. I just feel like this is such a tangled web and I just want what is best for my son. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2gl87Ey
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