Tldr: My daughter has always been very rough and somewhat inappropriate in her affection towards me especially and others generally. I want this behaviour to stop.Last night the whole issue came to a head and I have taken actions to get professional help. While we are waiting for these appointments (regular gp, pediatrician, child psych) and assessments (I booked her in for adhd testing, autism spectrum testing, and a behavioural assessment with a clinic in North Sydney) I am hoping to find other parents who have experienced similiar issues who might be able to advice me on how to triage this situation in the meantime. I have hit a hard limit with it and can't cope with it continuing.Currently I am having four problems with how she expresses her affection:She hurts me during physical affection by squeezing really hard, jumping on me, grabbing me, tangling my hair etc. She is now taller then me and I am 20 weeks pregnant so it badly frightens and hurts me when she does this. I won't continue hugging her or sitting with her once she does this but I often have to pry or push her off me as she says "I'll stop" but if I give her a second chance she does it again immediately.On occasions where she refrains from deliberately hurting me she "boops" me. This involves hitting me on the nose with a flat palm. I hate it. I have begged her to stop and punished her for doing it to no avail. All my positive feelings from the hug and nice conversation get changed into rage. I feel such fury that she disrespects such basic boundaries again and again and ruins something nice, doing something she knows I hate. It does not seem malicious, she doesn't seem to enjoy my reaction, her behaviour seems compulsive?On the rare occasion when neither of the above happens she instead makes me really uncomfortable by kissing my 20+ times in one go or just really getting up on my face to the point it is overwhelming. This results in my pulling back or telling her that's enough. My heart breaks for her because no matter what she does, she experiences me rejecting her.When we are walking she steps on my feet or trips me over upwards of 4-5 times in a 1/2 hour period. I have created a zone of safety that prohibits her from waking closer and always try to hold her hand so we can have a nice time walking side by side rather then her getting behind me and tripping me. Holding her hand also allows me to keep her at a safe distance and remind her of the safety zone. She always says it is a mistake and not her fault because she is clumsy (this is true she always has been exceptionally clumsy). But again, I'm pregnant and I find it very frightening when she does this.I don't understand why she does this and I need her to stop. I want to be able to have physical affection with my daughter. Tonight she again "booped" me and jumped on me. I asked her why she does it, I said "it can't feel good in your heart when mum shouts at you or pushes you away every time we have a hug. Why do you keep doing these things to mum?" She ignored me, embarrassed, and starting speaking to her Dad.It is tearing me apart emotionally, and practically I am afraid she is going to hurt me or her unborn baby brother. She doesn't seem to get any enjoyment from hurting me, in fact it upsets her that she is upsetting and hurting me, this makes it even more confusing as to why she does it? She often ends up crying or storming off hurt and confused. She is also never violent, she has never hit or hurt myself or anyone else in anger. But she frequently hurts family members when playing or hugging.This behaviour is not related to my pregnancy. She has always done this to me and to a lesser degree other family members. The pregnancy and her age/ height has just brought the issue to a head. It is now intolerable and unbearably distressing and has to stop. My partner thinks she will grow out of it and doesnt see it as a big deal. He says he was similar at her age and she has so much emotion inside her that it comes out as aggression but that doesnt explain the booping or stepping on my feet/ bumping into me. I have finally put my foot down and insisted she gets professionally evaluated and helped. Appointments are spread between tomorrow and in almost three months time due to wait lists.I really want to find other parents who have some experience and can give me some advice while we wait for the professionals. via /r/Parenting http://bit.ly/2vqc83x
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