A very long story as short as I can make it...I had a very difficult upbringing. I grew up poor in the very north of England on the Scottish Border. My family was very dysfunctional, my Father left when I was about 8 yrs old and moved to Thailand taking my older brother with him whom later returned in his late teens. My Mother found another guy eventually and moved in with him leaving me in the care of my sister and brother after my Dad left me at the airport when he was supposed to take me with him on a return trip instead of my brother. My brother was now a drug addict and my sister met someone and moved out. I could not stay around the people that my brother was involved with and a guy that lived at my Mam's house was trying to abuse me so I ended up on the streets.My Dad returned when I was 12 and I then lived with him. He blamed me for his having to stay in the UK, although the truth is he was in a lot of trouble with the police for running drugs etc. in Thailand. He mentally, emotionally and physically abused me until I joined the Army at 15 yrs old.My Dad went for an operation on his main artery due to a blockage, unfortunately he stroked out during the op leaving him unable to walk or talk or move his entire right side. No one in the family would care for him as I guess he pushed them all away with his controlling and abusive behaviour all their lives. So I left the army at 17 to care for him, it was very hard work considering I hated him and had dreamed about being free all of those years.Anyhow so I ended up drinking a lot after I had put my Dad to sleep each night. I had an argument with someone and I put a fire lighter through their front door. No one was hurt and I didn't intend to hurt anyone, but naturally I was arrested. I was sentenced to 6 months in a maximum security prison (HMP Castington). The prison has now been closed down as it was found to be the most violent institution in the U.K. It was very a difficult time in that place.So forward to now being 34, I have been with my wife whom I met when I was 17 in the Army, we have 2 wonderful children now 9 & 10. I run a marketing agency and my Wife runs a nursery. We're well off financially living in a very middle class area far away from my hometown. My problem is my kids are of the age where they ask a lot of questions about my childhood. I don't know why they're so interested, I guess it's because they see a lot of my Wife's family and not much of mine. They ask me almost on a weekly basis if I know anyone that has been in prison or if I've ever visited one. The situation is made worse by their young aunt taking a position as a prison physiologist, so it's a topic of conversation amongst family gatherings, everyone around the table know my past and that I never speak of it.So I'm now lying to my kids when I say no, and I feel terrible about it. They know all about my life in the Army and knew my father before he past away several years ago. We made peace together, during the time I cared for him he became the father I never had, a very loving and emotional man whom couldn't speak or move from his chair for 13 years. Hard to imagine but we built a wonderful bond between us. That's another story entirely though...So my question for help is, do I tell my children the truth? Or does it just open up more questions from them which I have to explain. Without context it basically sounds like I was a bad guy and got what I deserved, when in reality I was very lost in those years. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2qj9qYO
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