Tuesday 25 April 2017

Neighbor boy (7 y/o) trying to kiss/grope my (3 y/o) daughter


Part of me is in shock that this ACTUALLY happened mainly because I was telling my husband (when this neighbor moved in a few weeks ago) that this was now something we might want to watch out for---solely because some accounts I'd read about childhood sexual abuse often involved abuse from neighbors and other children, not because I'd had any reason to suspect anything!Anyway, my daughter was SO excited to have a playmate finally in our small complex, despite the age gap. I've seen them play together with simple toys like sidewalk chalk and squirt guns and he is very patient with her and often showers her with compliments when adults are present which struck me as very kind since he doesn't have any siblings himself. When I watch them from a window or our door it looks like he usually tries to get her to play schoolyard games that are too advanced for her level of coordination and they often just end up sort of hanging out together (he looks a little bored, but she loves it) or riding their scooters.They play in a fully visible common area and haven't been permitted in each other's homes yet. I haven't formally met his parents but they seem very busy with their respective jobs. The mom has happily chatted a couple times with my daughter when passing by on her way to her car. My husband complained one morning that he overheard them having a party in their backyard until 2am on a weeknight, with the boy present for it and everything (I think he may have been on spring break).This boy and my daughter don't play together often, but when they do I tend to keep an eye on them and today I spotted him trying to kiss her on the mouth and pull up her dress, while she attempted to dodge him. I asked what he was doing and he began listing off all the things he found "pretty" about her. Then he began complimenting me, in the most transparent ways, like asking how old I was and claiming I looked younger, etc. in a fairly obvious attempt to deflect my attention.My daughter doesn't seem bothered. She said yes when I asked her if he tried to kiss her. She said no to all my (admittedly leading) questions about whether he has tried to pull down her pants, touch her "here," etc. so I don't think anything truly terrible has happened. I told her who is and is not allowed to touch her vagina (only herself, me, daddy, and the doctor) and will be reiterating this during future bathtimes.Of course I will be speaking to his parents. I would love some input from this sub before I do, particularly parents of kids in this neighbor boy's age range (6-8) for insight. Thanks! via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2q3Ny4u

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