Judgemental wife, husband ‘addicted’ to gaming, how much is too much, and will no-one think of the children?!

What I want to know from parents who absolutely loves a hobby (gaming or anything else), if it is your passion and favourite hobby - after reading the facts below:Ensuring adequate quality time with partner/children, how much time should a parent/partner devote to their hobby (on their own) a week?Is what I have described below an addiction, way too much and unbalanced?Shout out to the gamer parents, how much do you play? Does your partner enjoy it also/think this is reasonable? If not, do you think you are neglecting your partner or kids with how you are playing?Is my proposal reasonable? If not, how can I make it better?​The facts, to the best of my ability:My husband of 9 years loves gaming, he always has, so I “knew what I getting into”.I didn’t mind gaming back then, we were single, it wasn’t every night, we watched shows and hung out together, I even played with him (not something I had done before I met him, so it was a novelty).Nowadays, he plays every night, and if he plays less one night, he watches shows instead.My problem is how much he plays. We both have full time jobs. I work less some weeks, but in that case I do all the house/kids chores I can fit in (very tidy obsessed).He likes to game. He says it helps him unwind (he has stress at work, plus he says me wanting him to help out around the house too much and getting angry about him not helping me enough is also stressful).We have two kids, 4 and 6 years old.​Children go to bed at 8:00, latest (rarely 8:30 – we start the bath-time wind down from 7:00).So, he’s able to play from 8:00/8:30 pm to 1:30/2:00 am, generous average. It’s more like 2:30/3:00, but I want to be conservative so when he sees this I am not dismissed for exaggerating.Doing the numbers, that’s 5.5 (38.5 hours min to 49 hours a week). Let’s say I am a big fat exaggerator (I’m really not, I’m all about data), but let’s just take off 15% for “that one time I went to bed before you”, it’s 32 hours for the night gaming.​During this time, I am sitting there next to him, watching youtube or netflix, but just random things, waiting for him to listen. He puts the onus on me to find a show or movieAt night when he’s gaming, if I to talk to him, he has his headphones on and can't hear me, I have to tap him to speak to him, which annoys him, and if I do it too much, he gets irritated I am bothering him.When he does listen, he moves aside a headphone and keeps watching the screen. Sometimes he responds, mostly I have to repeat it. And even if he hears, barely a response.Day gaming. During the week, when he comes home, he logs in, updates his bits, checks the happenings, light engagement, but it’s present. This is maybe 10 mins from 5:30 when he brings the kids home. Time negligible, it’s the fact he is keeping always connected that I am noting.In the car, streams gaming review audio in the car when dropping off kidsWeekends, if kids are quiet watching their reward TV time, he will play (2 hours, at least).If there’s a quiet moment, he will turn on the laptop, desktop or phone and play/listen/watch games e.g. cooking dinner, while the kids are bathing, when he's done eating and the kids aren't, post meal while he's "digesting" etc.​My proposal:He stop going to bed past midnight. Prolonged, it is bad for his health (mental and physical), even his lifespan. I love my doofus, but he needs to sleep earlier. Thing is, he thinks it's me trying to control him.My work is at night 3 nights a week. On those nights he plays to his heart's content.On the 4 remaining nights, we split the nights:1 night doing an activity for him to choose - like a movie, some shows, an anime whatever, he picks. Occasionally, I might game with him. Like, every fortnight/3 weeks. Look, I hate the games he shows me, I don't want to play. I can't say I blanket hate all games, it's not true, but then saying this leaves the door open for him to try me to like a game he likes. He hates the games I like (e.g. AoEII, I will never stop loving this game).2 nights for me! Movie, shows, online shopping, out to dinner, chatting about those bitches, whatever I want!Last night, lunches for the week, dinners, ironing the kids/work clothes etc. via /r/Parenting http://bit.ly/2XiGLo0