
Backstory: My ex husband and I share a daughter, we were married for maybe 3 years before we divorced. We weren't a good match and he had began an affair with the main front desk woman at his practice. We've both since remarried and both of us are well off financially. My husband and I have 2 kids in addition to my daughter with my ex, my ex and his wife don't have any children. Our custody agreement is as followed, I have her every week with the exception of every other weekend (Friday -Monday), my daughter works weekends and after school at a local bookstore making about $15/hr working about 20 hours a week. After taxes she brings home about $250 a week. I found out last night her dad is now charging her $80 a weekend for her rent.I have access to may daughters bank account and will until she is through her Bachelors degree, the only reason is when its time for her buy things for school is easier to just transfer it over and just to see how her money managing is going. She has 2 things a month she has to pay for, $10 for her phone data and her gas. I cover all basic must haves but she knows if she wants fancier material things she needs to get them herself (her make up, going out clothes and silly little trinkets). She never needs anything and for the most part doesn't want for much. She's a great kid and never acts out. I recently began to notice that every other week for the last couple of months she's been making Venmo transfers for $80 dollars.Last night I brought it up at dinner, and my daughter said she has to pay $80 to her dad for her room. My husband and were shocked. After dinner my husband and I discussed what we learned and he mentioned that maybe her dad is "charging her but saving the money".. so I called him, turns out he isn't saving the money and thinks needs to pay for her room and food. I mentioned I don't think that fair, maybe he could give her some more elevated chores, at our house she makes dinner on Wednesday nights and she is in charge of laundry. He wasn't having it.I understand that its not my place to criticize his parenting, everyone does something different, but I do not feel ok with my 16 year old giving her father $80 to stay at his home as per a legally binding custody agreement.I asked him if she had done something wrong or disrespectful that made this a punishment? His response was "No of course not, she so well behaved, but she needs to learn she can't live for free. I want to make sure she learns her life is good and she shouldn't forget that life isn't free, $80 every other week isn't a lot. If she doesn't want to pay, we can see each out of the house during the day and she can sleep at your home at night."I feel like this is so wrong, she's our MINOR child, she is in high school and works and is getting ready for college. She shouldn't be made to pay rent. I just don't know what to do. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2tOq7zg
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