Non-smoking parents, How do you respond to smoke around your children/family?

Neither of us smoke, but most everyone on both sides of our family does. This has recently become a problem again because winter is approaching and all family gatherings will be held inside, small sized homes that are heavily smoked in.We love all of our family members and don't aim to upset them but last year we were told holiday after holiday that the smoking would be kept to a minimum and windows/doors, whatever, would be left open but this was never the reality of it. We both also understand that it's not just the direct smoke that you should be concerned with, it's all the smoke particles left over as well. Since we didn't feel like we were met at least halfway last year, we have decided to tell the families in advanced that we won't be part of the gatherings if we can't agree on a smoke-free location to meet at.We have personally offered to pay for whatever hall or banquet needed, but it's not looked at as even an option. Instead, it's almost like the family has shunned us since we are the first generation to say no to the cigarette smoke.The family still spends time with our daughter, she is taken out on the weekend to go shopping with grandma and visits her grandpa each weekend that doesn't smoke at all. All family is allowed over to visit, we have never pushed anyone away.So I ask, are we missing something as parents, just trying to do what we feel is right by our child? We honestly only care this much, because she is only 2 and can't speak for herself. She will go where we take her, and she'll breathe what we let around her. When she is old enough, it might be something to explain to her, the risks and all the gooey, and if she is comfortable with hanging out inside the smokey homes then we would make sure to at least let her for a few hours. Until then though, it's on us to be her voice and I can't believe we are being treated like bad parents for doing the right thing...Anyone else get through a situation similar? Any suggestions on how to get the inlaws on both sides to understand? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2gxRNFL