Has anyone else developed a favourite child as their kids have become adults?

I feel like the worst paren alive for saying this, but while I never had a favourite child when they were kids, these days, my daughter (29) is the pride and light of my life, while I struggle to be proud of my son (25) or even like him.It wasn't like this when they were kids. If anything, I actually found my son easier to like when they were young. I had severe PPD after the birth of my daughter and it took forever to bond with her – it didn’t help that she was a "terrible" baby that screamed for hours every night and wouldn't sleep. It is a terrible thing to say, but I even regretted having her for quite some times. I actually decided not to have more children because she was so difficult but had a birth control failure shortly before her 3rd birthday. My son was the baby everyone dreams of having and was an angelic toddler. I had no PPD found him much easier to “like” and bonded with him much easier.I can look myself in the eye and say that I gave both my children equal opportunities in life and they turned out differently not because one of them was favoured, but because one of them made much better choices.My Son? Dropped out of high school the moment he didn't legally need parental consent to do it. His reason was "I fucking hate school, always have". His sister was naturally more intelligent, but my son could have succeeded if he tried. He never did. He got a couple of minor criminal convictions, which really disappointed me. He never showed any interest in learning a trade or doing any post secondary education or any on the job training and now works in a dead end job. He had the opportunity to speak Spanish but chose not to. Very overweight as a result of poor lifestyle choices (lives on fast food and never works out).My daughter? She is fluent in both English and Spanish, and studied German and French at school/university and has passed the C1 proficiency test in both languages. She is also conversational in Brazilian Portuguese which her boyfriend taught her. She has a bachelors and a masters degree and now lives in Switzerland where she has a very good job. She eats well and works out and it shows - she looks years younger than her age and everyone who sees a picture tells me how beautiful she is.(Re the Spanish: My husband and I are Australian. My mother was born in South America and moved here with her parents when she was a child. I refused to learn Spanish when I was younger (my greatest regret). She babysat the children when they were younger (holidays and after school). When my daughter was 3, she begged my mother to teach her. We agreed we'd keep English until she went to pre-school (a year later) and then go to Spanish. She was fluent within a year. She planned to do the same with my son, but he didn't want to learn and would just demand she switch to English. She kept offering to teach him Spanish and he didn't want to. So she kept speaking to my daughter in Spanish and my son in English until she died about 15 years ago. My son now constantly tries to complain that his sister’s Spanish ability means she was favoured as a child despite the fact he has been told numerous times that he refused to learn Spanish and his sister even tried to encourage him to learn).I can't help it.I just feel so proud of my daughter for her accomplishments and everything she has done, but I find it really hard to be proud of my son.The thing that makes it harder?The partners.I love my daughter's fiancee and hate my son's wife.I have never liked my son’s wife since the day I met her. It took her less than an hour to start showing that she was casually racist, which bothers me deeply. She expects everyone to love her, but will treat people like crap in return. She is especially disrespectful of my daughter. I suspect there is a lot of jealousy happening, and she would take any opportunity she had to try and rip my daughter down for things she is insecure about, like making fun of my daughter for working a "shitty loser retail job" a few years ago while she was unemployed and living off my son's wages and her welfare payments, and making fun of my daughter for being "older and unmarried", when OTHER family members (cousins) were commenting on how she'd be a very young bride, and calling my daughter "shallow" for travelling instead of having "real commitments", when she was clearly jealous she went to Peru with a friend to climb Macchu Picchu. My daughter had to delete her from Instagram because she always made very catty comments on her photos. They now have 2 daughters aged 6mo and 18mo and use their daughters to manipulate us into doing whatever they want. If my daughter ever tries to stand up for herself when his wife is rude, they start telling my husband and I to pull her into line or else we won't see our granddaughters. We called their bluff on this recently and they then got angry that they didn't have a babysitter. They have made it clear they want my daughter cut off. I’m disappointed in my son for not ever sticking up for his sister when his then girlfriend would be openly rude to her. They are free to dislike her, but I really resent that he bought someone who can not at least be civil and polite into this family and imposed someone disrespectful onto the rest of us. My daughter has never said it, because I don't think she wants the drama, but I am very sure their engagement was the thing that made my daughter decide to move to Germany (masters) and then take a job in Switzerland instead of coming home. I feel like this has made me dislike my son compared to her - he bought this horrible person into the family and drove my daughter away.On the other hand, my daughter’s fiancee (a Brazilian living in Switzerland) is one of the nicest people you will ever ask to meet. He is polite, intelligent, kind and just an absolute pleasure to know. I can't say enough about what a nice person he is.I just. I don't know. I'm feeling like a horrible person for thinking it, but I honestly love my daughter so much more now my kids are adults and have become that person I swore I would never be - the person with a favourite child. I hate seeing my son or visiting him, but count down the days to seeing my daughter. I am worried that if my daughter has children one day, I will end up liking them more because I like their parents more.Anyone else been through this?Please don't tell me I'm an asshole. I feel bad for thinking it, and really did treat them equally growing up - it was their life choices that made me start to get a favourite. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2vJeH1P