So, our family:I'm a therapist. My wife is a chef. She was chef-de-cuisine for a restaurant that was awarded a couple Michelin stars. She's pretty serious business, which I think is awesome. She works most evenings, so I'm certainly primary caregiver, which I love. She comes home about 1:30-2:00 AM and wakes me up to spend time together. She can be pretty bossy. I get a kick out of telling her "no" to her crazy ideas, because she's so used to hearing "yes, chef" that it throws her for a loop and she looks ready to kill until she realizes that I'm her husband and our bedroom is not a kitchen :). She's also not allowed in our actual kitchen when I'm cooking, because she looks at everything I do like I'm a weird stick-insect.She's a good mom, but she's more of a provider-type. She only really sees our daughters from when they get home from school until she leaves for work, and then on Sundays and Mondays when neither of us work and I try to sneak away to get some me time on Sunday afternoon (Monday after school is our family time).I cook for our three daughters. My wife cooks for birthdays and holidays (you haven't totally lived until you've had her sourdough, walnut, and root vegetable stuffing cooked in duck fat). I take the girls to visit her at work every Friday early before things get hectic. I'm probably the easiest customer/best tipper in the history of man, but I still get a kick out of how terrified the servers are when we show up to order the same four spinach salads, two mac-and-cheeses (not on the menu, but one of the sous-chefs is killing the mac-and-cheese game) and two "whatever they want to make me" (me, fish; my eldest, some vegetable). Needless to say, we get prompt service.So, three daughters, 14, 11, and 8. The 11 year old is basically a little female version of me; she's easy. She gets up before her sisters to go for a run with me every morning. She eats whatever. Her normal school lunch is an omelette folded into an english muffin with sauce and Dad's fries, which is just carrots, zucchini, and okra seared in oil and cumin with Heinz ketchup mixed with cayenne pepper.My eldest has gone vegan. I have no idea why, but I admire her commitment. She's going on two years with it. She gets breaded eggplant with sauce (sauce, for all of them, is a third eggplant slice pureed with hot sauce, dijon mustard, and spices). It's easy enough, I just cook the eggplant in the middle of the pan and the fries on the fringes, and then cook an omelette really quick after the eggplant is done.My youngest has previously just wanted sandwiches. PB&J, turkey, cheese, and mustard... simple stuff. But now she wants to go vegan.All of my girls idolize their mother. Without realizing it, they get their hair cut like hers, dress like her, and whatnot. They never want their nails done, because "Mom doesn't get hers done".But my youngest also totally idolizes her oldest sister. And my eldest was unquestionably born to be a mother. When my youngest was little, my eldest wanted to help change and bathe her and teach her to read and whatnot. She was a six-year old wannabe Mom. They share a strong bond.So, the issue: My youngest wants to be vegan like her older sister. But, she's already underweight, roughly 9-11th percentile for her age. I think she's thin by nature, but it's something we've tried to keep an eye on. She eats, but she never really gains weight.Anyhow, she wants to go vegan, except her favorite foods are all mac & cheese, meat, fish, and things like that. It won't stick, at least not yet. I think it's good for her to try and (I assume) fail, and that she'll learn from it. She won't die of malnutrition, and she'll eat if she gets hungry. My wife is very opposed to the whole idea. She feels that we should tell her "no" until she reaches a certain age (by which she means, until our youngest is at a better weight).This is complicated by the fact that I prepare the food, so I have to deal with the bellyaching. I also don't know what to make her. I can just make a sandwich, but she is expressing that she doesn't want that. If I'm not making her eggplant... what exactly am I making her? Whatever it is, she doesn't want it, because she's determined to emulate her big sister. I have been lucky to enjoy peaceful and fun mornings making lunch.. I can get it all done in about 20-30 minutes. The girls help chop and puree. Suddenly it's all a kerfuffle, and half the time there are waterworks.So, what to do? I mostly just want her to eat and be happy, but it seems like in order to be happy she wants food she probably won't eat, and it's pretty important that she eats.I have asked my wife to make something at work (or have someone in the kitchen do so) that our youngest will eat and that is calorie-dense. I simply don't have the time, equipment, or expertise to deep fry some veggies or something. My wife will probably do it if I push, but she's resistant to the idea altogether. She thinks it's better not to entertain a dietary change.So I'm not sure what to do. I can talk to my wife just fine. I'm not looking for marriage advice. I'm looking for cooking/parenting advice. Anyone else have a younger kid who wants to be like the older kid, even though they're not the same and probably won't succeed if they try? Anyone else have an underweight kid who wants to go on a diet she probably doesn't understand (I've talked with her, I think she knows what vegan is, but I don't think she has any idea how many things are not vegan) and likely won't eat? Anybody know a good way to cook super-high-calorie vegan food (that isn't PB&J, because that "doesn't count") in half an hour (or in a big batch on the weekend)?TL;DR: My 8 year old wants to be vegan like her sister. My wife says no because my 8 year old is underweight. I prepare the food. What to do? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2xlDOru
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