When my son was a toddler, my (at the time) husband and I were in the car with him and some music was on. When we got wherever we were going, my husband turned off the car and the music stopped but my son kept singing the chorus, over and over, in his toddler way. He'd never heard it before, but he knew it. And I was like, this surely can't be normal? I posted on my fb group of other moms with young kids how my son was so talented with music and had a real musical gift and I thought it was significant. It wasn't the first time I'd seen it happen, but it was the clearest.I immediately got told by pretty much every mom in the group that every toddler loves music and I shouldn't focus too much on that. Alright. Fine. I was deflated, but I knew that I didn't know any better and every kid is different and whatever. I was a new mother and knew I saw him in a way others couldn't. I accepted that maybe I was blinded by that. But I held a question mark about it, though otherwise pretty much let it go in the "I see it but don't make a thing out of it" kind of way.And then he got to 5th grade. Right after school started, his district had a night where kids could go to try out instruments and decide if they wanted to be in the band and what they would like to play. My boys are super tall, and my son's elongated arms made the teacher with the trombones say that he was made for them, probably off-handed, likely jokingly. Such a random comment has completely changed? cemented? guided? my son's life. He was certain the trombone was for him, and he started lugging it to and from school on the bus.At the end of the year, in 5th grade!, he was given a solo part for the band's big performance. The next year, on the computer, he played for me a song he'd composed in some software for the entire band. In middle school he joined the jazz band and auditioned for district band and won first chair in both of those parts. He's now a freshman in high school, in the band/marching band, again part of the jazz band and wanting to audition for district band, sights set 100% on a career in music.A couple nights ago I went to a thing for him. We were walking back to the cars, chit-chatting, and a one of the kids behind us said, "Hey, [son], is this your mom?" I turned around and he introduced himself as the section leader. I shook his hand and the kid next to him also introduced himself. After a brief pause, the second kid said, "You know, your son is really talented. Like, for a freshman? Really very talented." The section leader nodded his head and added similar comments.My heart just burst with pride. I've seen my kid out there before games playing the national anthem, the school fight song, at halftime doing the performance. He was a piece of an entire puzzle. But all of those pieces made me so proud. And then hearing from a couple peers of his who are also young, and figuring out their places out in the world, that I truly have something to be proud of beyond my boy's hard work and passion for music? That was amazing. Amazing. I can't really articulate.The next day my son tells me he and a few friends have formed their own personal quartet and for it, he's arranging the Russian national anthem so they can play it as a group. ??? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Where did this kid come frome?!So last night I went to the game to watch the halftime show and basically burst again. I just kind of exploded even though there was no one to pick up those pieces. I watched him and cheered and took a bunch of pictures because not only is he giant and kind and funny and loving, he looks so damn much like his dad, who has passed away and would also be falling all over himself with pride for our son. It's a sickening, horrible guilt I carry, that I can see the boys grow and become themselves and live up to their potential, and their dad can't.Today is his first marching band competition. I'll be there, wearing the matching shirt I bought, wearing the button with his picture, probably close to/in tears at how much I love to see him doing what he loves. Watching him be him.I don't know what my point is, other than to completely and consequentlessly (maybe) bitch about those moms who told me I was just being a mom and seeing something in my son that was normal but I felt was extraordinary. I knew what I saw. I never let it go, though I downplayed it in the fear that I was being foolish.But now? No.I am not, was not ever, a foolish mother (in this respect). He clearly has a gift and talents and something special when it comes to music, and I'm so damn proud of him. Don't even get me started on the other stuff that he's interested in and excels with! He's just really freaking great. Really. You have no idea.[Before anyone asks about my other son, I am bursting for him as well, for the reasons that make him him. He (hopefully) is not overshadowed by Big Musical Brother and instead sees that his brother is someone to look up to rather than someone to separate himself from. I don't know. It's tenuous and I don't know how to guide that.]Thanks for letting me just gush like a goon over something fairly inconsequential. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2PVSwfL
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