Should I Be Concerned?

So my ex wife and I have been coparenting for over a year now. There’s been some ups and downs, but overall I think we’ve been successful. Sorry for the long post.My son is almost three and only uses a handful of words. He’s got a speech therapist, but I can’t ask him what’s going on and I wouldn’t if I could, I feel it’s better for someone who deals with child psychology to ask the questions as I don’t want to lead him. But since he’s non-verbal, I don’t feel anyone can really ask him questions.We still try to be friends and in December she casually told me about this guy she was dating about. After some of the things she told me about him, I said I didn’t feel comfortable with him being around our 2 (at the time) year old son. She told me they broke up and that was that until I found out recently that she never broke up with him, in fact he moved in with her and is around my son a lot. Here’s the things that she told me that made me feel uncomfortable.He lied about having an STD test to her. He said he got one once a month with his job, this was a lie.He lied to her where he was once, he told her he was in the hospital with an anxiety attack and then she found out he was really with his wife (yes, wife, I’ll get back to that in a minute).He lied to her and told her he wasn’t married. She did some digging, found out he was married through Facebook posts. He then told her that his wife and daughter had died in a car accident and he’s only married to the woman because his wife who died asked him to marry her best friend so she’d have insurance. This was all a lie. No kid or wife died, he was still married to this woman and he had a kid with her. No second marriage, nothing.He hit a deer with his car. Then he lost his temper after getting it of his car to check the damage and kicked this deer while it was dying.So, my ex has been lying to me this whole time about him being around my son. I could probably deal with that, BUT before I even knew he was still in the picture, I started noticing changes in my son. He’s fighting diaper changes, he’s touching himself more by sticking his hand in his diaper, and he’s even been grabbing my penis through my shorts (each time he does this I explain to him we don’t touch other people there, though I’m not sure he understands since he’s non-verbal.I was abused as a child, my ex knows this. When I mentioned these things to her before I found out about this guy, she blew it off and said that he’s just growing up and kids are curious and rebellious. Now that I know about the guy, I asked if he’s been alone with him and she freaked out and started accusing me of possibly abusing our son because I was abused as a child also. I wouldn’t ever do that, I love him more than anything and I promised him as I held him the first time that I’d never let that happen to him.Am I over reacting? Should I take him to a child psychologist? If I do take him to one, is there anything they can even do since he’s non-verbal? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2pqM0Cu