Advice for the Grieving Parent

Know that somehow you will survive.Know that you are not alone.Allow numbness.Try not to forget that your spouse and surviving children are also grieving.Keep in mind that grief does not procede in orderly predictable stages.Wear a symbol of mourning.Use the name of your child.Be prepared for the enormous effort it will take to have a normal, mundane conversation.Cry.It is common to feel the presence of your child.Prepare to answer the question "How many children do you have?".Plan ahead for what you are going to do on difficult days such as the birthday of your child and the anniversary of the death.Let go of destructive myths about grief and mourning, such as'I need to be strong and carry on' - 'I need to get a hold on myself' -'I need to get over my grief' -'My child wouldn't want me to be sad'.Go easy on people who say stupid things like'At least you had him/her as long as you did' - 'You can always have another child' - 'You'll grow so much stronger because of this' - 'I know how you feel' - 'It is God's way'.Don't expect the pain to ever fully go away.Excerpt Pantom Limb - a film by Jay Rosenblatt via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2wA7ZIH