My husband wont help me at home and thinks I should be able to do it all but I can’t help feeling like I’m failing

My husband has a lot of good qualities. He works at a job he doesn’t like every day because it pays well and affords us to live comfortably. He’s hard working, kind, funny and my best friend. But there’s some things that he does/expects that feel really entitled. (been together 2 years, and got pregnant with our one year old daughter early on).For one when he comes home he wants all the lights off where he is relaxing. This includes the kitchen and living room where I am usually still cooking dinner/attending to our toddler. He says the bright lights bother him and we have a small lamp in there for this reason that I use. If I turn them back on so I can see what I’m doing better, like for a diaper change, he complains until I turn them back off.Another thing is that since I’m a SAHM, he expects to not have to really do much at home, including household chores. If I ask him for anything I get an exasperated sigh and an excuse of “I’m tired, can’t I just relax?” I am totally fine with him relaxing, but the problem is he’s “relaxing” almost everyday, including the majority of weekends and not do anything elseI rarely leave the house because if I do I have to take our toddler (which again I am ok with most of the time) but she hates going out for long periods. It’s hard to do all the errands all the time with a little one who screams once she’s fed up, which is only after an hr of being out.I guess I just don’t know what’s normal and what’s not. Anytime I tell him I’m unhappy or overwhelmed he tells me that both his sisters husbands do a lot less than him. They’re both type A/superwomen and I’m far from it, which might be part of the problem? I feel like I’m drowning in housework, childcare, budgeting the bills 24/7 and can never keep up. I know he works so hard, 10 hr days most days out in the cold.But I don’t really know how these things are supposed to be divvied up since I’m a first time SAHM. He thinks I should be able to handle everything else since I’m home all day. I do try to handle everything else but it’s harder than I ever imagined it to be. Am I in the wrong for asking for help when he works so hard? I feel like I’m failing at everything and sometimes think if I just had that little extra help from him I wouldn’t be so overwhelmed. What should I do? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2CWALIQ