
Hi guys,We moved to a new town at the beginning of August, and our 2 older boys (5 and 3) have been socializing well in our neighbourhood. They made friends with a 5yo down the street. He asked if my 5yo would come for a sleep over earlier this week, his mom said maybe the weekend, so the weekend comes and she wants to go to the movies last night and her son asks if he can sleep over, we said sure, we’d be happy to accommodate.We put the kids to bed, but since it’s a first time sleepover for both my kids it’s very exciting. Around 9pm I break up the shenanigans and put them in sleeping rooms. Because my son was being extra silly I thought to put him on the couch. Then I retired to my room with my wife but kept our door open to hear what’s going on in the room where my 3yo on the top bunk is sharing a room with the 5yo from down the street. After a short while we hear our 3yo tell the 5yo that he doesn’t want to play that game and NO this is my bed that’s your bed. My wife goes in to see what’s going on and they’re both naked and the 5yo wants to play weenie on weenie with my 3yo.Ok so before I go any further, I know this is a red flag to call CAS, thanks.So we break it up, I call 5yos neighbours mom to ask her to take hin back home. My 5yo is out cold on the couch, my 3yo snuggles in with mom in our bed.I tell 5yo neighbours mom what happened, she said he was having a sleep over and another kid wanted to play that game with him. Then she took him home.So to make things more complicated, we walked by 5yo neighbours house today (it’s on the way to the park where I took the boys to play this afternoon). And my 3yo says hi to the 5yo and tells him he wants to play penis to penis. Then I tell him we can’t go visit the 5yo neighbours right now because we have to take my 1yo home for his nap. Then my 3yo breaks down and says he wants to play penis to penis with the 5yo neighbour. And when I asked him why he said “because he loves him.” And then I said buddy, we need to go home and i start guiding him home by the handles of his scooter. Then he reluctantly walked the rest of the way.I put my 1yo down for his nap and ask my 5yo what happened last night, he says my 3yo was disruptive and that my 3yo and 5yo were touching each other’s penises. I wanted to get more clarification but my 1yo needed to nap. After putting him down I find my 3yo in his bed crying. So I apologized for getting upset and asked if I could explain and come lie with him in his bed. When calmed down enough, he invited me up, and I explained to him how it’s not a game to play penis to penis, and that he shouldn’t be touching anybody’s nor should anybody be touching his. I also explained that he shouldn’t be saying those kinds of words in public out on the street since they’re private words you discuss in safe places with people you trust.Then I called my wife to tell her what had happened, and we’re both unsure of how to proceed. We don’t know if we should call CAS, since 5yo neighbour already has a tough life, and I don’t know if he’s even at fault since if some other kid did it to him and he’s just playing it like it’s a game, I mean I definitely just saw how my 3yo repeated the game request back after brief exposure to it. Should we get counselling for my son? How traumatic is it? Can we talk it out ourselves? Obviously I’ll be keeping an extra close eye and disallow any further sleep overs. We think it’s okay that they play in public still. Like we don’t resent the 5yo neighbour at all, he’s a good kid who’s just lonely (his half brother is 14), and his parents smoke and drink a lot. He was obedient at our house and I genuinely didn’t have a problem with him otherwise. We just don’t know where this game came from. And now we’re both rather apprehensive about letting our kids go to the same school.Does anyone have experience with this kind of thing? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2MAA5Qc
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