When the kid's parents' cell phone starts ringing in the movie Storks, and it's the same ring tone as my cell phone, I think to myself, "Why are the rings in my ringtone slightly faster than usual?" Then I run to get my cell phone, and then I'm confused as to why there's no missed call notification. Then I realize that it was the parents' cell phone ringing in the movie.THEN I RECALL BEING A PARENT HAS DESTROYED MY MEMORY AND ATTENTION SPAN and I laugh a kind of laugh that is halfway between grateful and slightly sad because I am giving my brain cycles to my children. I FALL FOR THIS PARTICULAR CELL PHONE SOUND EFFECT EVERY TIME, no matter how many times my children watch this movie. I then resolve to change my ring tone so I don't fall for it again.But then, while I'm thinking about all this, my 1.5 year old climbs to the top of a precarious stack of things perched just over a tall stack or small pile of sharp shards of some other item and smiles and I have to go rescue him from a certain fall from a height onto sharply pointed shards of something or other.And then, relieved I saved my child from a lifetime of eyes-poked-out blindness or shards of something in his esophagus, I FORGET TO CHANGE MY RINGTONE.Then, next week, when I have to put all the white clothes into the washer and put in color-removing dye powder that would irritate my children's eyes and breathing systems because my 4 year old wanted his Superman cape washed with the whites so everything got Pepto pink, I put on Storks, because that's what keep them (maybe) sitting in one place for a few minutes while I throw the laundry in, along with the powder that makes them wheeze and cry.After I start the washer and just as I enter the living room to check on them and make sure they're not egging each other on to some sort of perilous couch stunt...THE PARENTS' CELL PHONE RINGS IN THE MOVIE...AND I GO RUNNING FOR MY PHOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE. Because...maybe, just maybe, someone in the outside world who is a grown-up is calling me to talk to me, which could mean that I still exist and have not been utterly forgotten by everyone who does not have small children. Or, actually, forgotten by everyone who doesn't have my children.But no. No one is calling to talk to me.It's just a cell phone sound effect in the Andy Samberg movie Storks.Knock knock."No, you can't come in buddy. Just go sit down and watch the movie, ok? Dad will be out in a few minutes." (After I quietly cry in my office where no one can see Dad cry.)Time to open the door."Ok. Who wants ice cream?"Because Dad sure does. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nhTHMQ
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