Birthday party donations

My child (4 years old) has been invited to a few parties recently where the host has asked for donations to a charity in lieu of gifts. In each case, my child has asked her friend what they want for their bday and they've always stated a toy. So far, my gifting policy has been a small toy, plus money for the donation, usually spending a total of $20-30. I think getting a gift for someone else is a fun part about going to a party. You have to remember what you know about your friend and think about what they'd like from you. It teaches a decent lesson. 2/3 times, my gift from plus donation gig has paid off. Other people at the parties followed suit and the kids got gifts and donations. The last party we went to, the family just had a big card box set up for donations and absolutely no one else brought a gift. I'll keep going with my small gift/donation game, but what do you do? Do you just get behind the parent's political activities and donate money or do you get the kid (who answered honestly when asked about a gift) a present? The party isn't for parents...it's for the child. Also, I'm not asking parents to make a donation at my child's birthday party because, to be frank, my kid likes presents. When she plays with a toy she got two years ago, she can still tell me who got it for her and when. It's important to her. So am I just as annoying to others for not backing an organization when I host my child's birthday party? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oCGE59