Vent/Need Opinions: I feel my partner is being reckless with marijuana usage in presence of 1yo

First, apologies if this isn't the right place, I just feel backed in a corner and could really use outside opinions on this that I don't think normal relationship subs can weigh in on fairly.Anyway, currently not seeing eye to eye with wife over marijuana in the house. Things exploded a couple days ago when she left a vape pen on a table within reach of our child, who in the span of about 5 seconds picked it up along with a lighter and was in the process of bringing to her mouth when I noticed what she had. I lost my cool and tossed it across the room. This prompted wife to enter the room and begin berating me for throwing something across the house while pretty much ignoring the fact that child was seconds away from having the object in her mouth. Instead harping on the fact that "I thought I could trust you to watch her so I could wash my hands, you leave shit around all the time but you don't see me throwing it across the room"This argument led to some re-assessing of whats going on at home which I began to realize that wife spends majority of waking time outside smoking tobacco and weed. Example, after napping with child, Mom will almost immediately head outside to smoke for anywhere between 1 to 2 hours, come inside to make food or have a brief interaction with child before heading back outside to smoke more before child is due for nap. If this occurs while I'm unavailable, child is left in front of TV for duration. If I bring up how long Mom has been outside I get told I'm exaggerating.Mom also has no qualms about driving while or shortly after smoking. She insists that it doesn't affect her ability, etc. My offers to drive are typically shot down due to claims of carsickness if not behind the wheel.It's to the point that I don't feel comfortable leaving wife and child alone so I've become distant to the few friends I have whereas wife is local as are in-laws. Had a big discussion with in-laws who only seem to have issue with aspects of our relationship, and respond to the vape pen incident with "Kids aren't china...they aren't just going to break".There's obviously more but I don't want to make this too big a wall of text. I don't want to lose my daughter and want her to be in a safe place but I have no idea right now if I'm overreacting or what to do. Any input would be greatly appreciated, even if it's just "This belongs in another subreddit". Thanks in advance. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2Oypl5n