Wife and I have different strategies to calm our 3.5 year old down from his tantrum

My wife and I have very opposite views on how to calm my 3.5 year boy from a tantrum. I prefer to stay close to him and try to actively call him down and understand why he is upset.If he is just screaming and won’t listen, I will walk away and come back every few minutes and try again. Eventually get him to calm down.I feel a great sense of accomplishment and bonding when I can calm my son down.My wife will just let him scream and not intervene until he calms down by himself. For example he has been screaming in the bathroom now for 20 minutes, and she won’t go in to talk to him, she just talks to him through the door. She said she won’t open the door until he calms down on his own. I actually went in to go talk to him and she got angry that I am interfering with what she is doing.I like doing it the way I’m doing it. I just think it’s a more humane way of helping him deal with his emotions. And i think it works faster to calm him down. Am I so wrong? Is my wife’s way better? I mean he might succumb and come out of the bathroom eventually, but is that teaching him anything?She accuses me of coddling him; I disagree. I just feel like not being mean.Please let me know your thoughts. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/3bIuu2J

"No" to everything

I know this behaviour is normal, but what should I do about it? Anything I ask my just-turned-2yo is met with a "no" straight away and she doesn't do what she's asked. The outcome is usually me physically making her do whatever I've asked, or any other tactic. For example, she won't stand up in the bath when it's time to get out (to make it earlier for me to lift her out). There's no water in the bath at this point. I've taken to leaving the room, which then makes her stand up because she doesn't want me to leave without her. But if I ask her to come to me to have her hair brushed or to get her dressed, etc, I have to go after her and carry her and make her stay there while I carry out the task. Once I've got her, she's usually fairly compliant. She also doesn't see it as a game. She just sits there, refusing to come to me, or leaves the room. Always with "no". She's not a particularly naughty child. She doesn't melt down when I do get hold of her, usually.Is this "no" phase just something they grow out of? Does she need to be punished for her refusing to do as she's asked? I was researching time outs and it mostly referred to using it to get them to calm down. She's calm enough, she's just refusing to do as she's asked. Any advice, please? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2R4VhP0

Pacifier or no pacifier? This is getting too stressful.

Both of our mothers insist that we do not use a pacifier. We don't have any help and have to raise our newborn on our own.It's been very difficult to get him to sleep. He rarely if ever sleeps for a 2-3 hour window. Are pacifiers really that bad in moderation? There are times where he screams and tries to suck on his hands.Edit: he sleeps sometimes for just 20 minutesEND EDITA pacifier calms him down and get him to relax.There's been a lot of pressure on us to not use a pacifier but he's starting to become a mentally handful. Wife only slept 3 hours last night and me 4. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/3dPeXzV

Almost 3 years later, I still strongly dislike parenthood.

I have written this a few times and keep deleting it, but lately I have been slipping into a depression so whatever. I will probably be heavily criticized and delete this anyway. I, like many others, have been suspended from duties (as a 3rd year medical student) and have been home with my kid (almost 3) and husband, who was let go recently, for almost 3 weeks. My kid's daycare was canceled until further notice.I hate being home. I hate dealing with the mundane every day tasks of getting up, making sure they eat breakfast, fighting with them every moment of every hour to do what I ask, etc. I am once again feeling inadequate as a parent and have retreated into a room to study/work on research because I cannot handle my kid 24/7. I am exhausted and having thoughts of running away. Everything where I live is closed so we are stuck inside all day every day with no end in sight. We take our kid hiking occasionally but there have been many people on the trails and it has been hard to follow social distancing protocols. My husband is also at his wits' end and has been picking up my slack.I have a joke of an online curriculum (ie, I am doing nothing essentially) and have already mostly finished studying for an "exam" I am supposed to take next Friday. There is no structure to my day or expectations. I feel like I am in limbo and am miserable.Everyone has said it gets better... Pregnancy was absolutely awful for a multitude of reasons, and I also hated the newborn stage (our kid was colicky and screamed from 7pm-3am every night for 3mos). My husband got a vasectomy because of how traumatic the newborn stage was for us. Parenthood "improved" when I started medical school and wasn't home as often, and my kid went to daycare. Now that I am home again, I am feeling how I felt during the newborn stage: intense anxiety, depressive symptoms, but no thoughts of harming myself/other. I did not have PPD after the birth of my kid but do suffer from anxiety and PTSD. We have family support but everyone is still working and cannot help much.Obligatory I love my kid and they were a planned baby. They amaze me every day with their intelligence and compassion, among other things...but if I could do it all over again, I wouldn't.I am not meant to be a stay at home wife/mother and this is my worst fear realized. I just want to be alone. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2UYJnqS

Anyone else's kids actually miss going to school?

My son (13) is getting really restless and missing friends. At first he thought this would be like a holiday but 2 weeks in he's no longer so thrilled. I have been having him do math, science, writing, music, and chores on some kind of schedule during school days so the days don't drag on and on. Then from about 3pm on he's free to do whatever he wants. Anyone else's kids feel the same? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/39ypmNm

My 2 year old fed my AirPods to the dog.

I called my husband sobbing and he came home from work and told me to go somewhere.... I just started running because I can’t go to the gym and they were helping make it a little easier. I still want to scream. It’s just stuff..... it’s just money..... We’re all healthy ..... right?ETA a word via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2JxYqm8

Found sex toy in my daughter's room

It's a Fleshlight, for guys. She's an only child and I'm a single mom, so no men in the house. Why does she have that?? She's too embarrassed and won't talk about it. She's 16 btw via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/3bK1rvL