My son is 3.5. He's always been challenging, having more of an extreme personality from the get-go and always reacting very passionately and intensely. He's also smart, funny, very intuitive, perceptive, and I love him like crazy.The past month or so, his behavior seems to be spiraling out of control. We have always struggled with tantrums, but I have worked really hard at learning how to parent him as best I can — with tons of patience, not getting caught up in his storms, trying to stay the calm parent figure regardless of how much he screams and cries. But lately I am truly struggling.He goes ballistic at the drop of a hat. For example, last night for dinner he had potato latkes and applesauce. He usually dips the latkes in applesauce but last night he was hungry and "forgot" and ate the entire applesauce first. He immediately demanded another applesauce and I told him calmly that I see he finished his and couldn't have any more applesauce. He absolutely lost his mind screaming and flailing, bucking back and forth like he was having a tonic clonic seizure - totally out of control for something so trivial. I told him I can't talk to him or understand him and I would wait until he calms down. He eventually calmed down and I asked if he wanted ketchup instead, and he was happy to get the ketchup bottle himself and put some in a little bowl.Another example is asking for things that he knows the answer to. We were about to get in the bath last night and everything was going fine. Out of the blue, he asks if he can sleep over his grandparents house. I told him we couldn't do that tonight but we maybe we could plan that soon. Again - completely ballistic meltdown. He started whipping things across the room at me and charged at me and hit me really hard! I tried to calmly let him know that hitting is unacceptable and he's going directly to his room, but he doesn't even hear me over his screaming. I just picked him up kicking and screaming and put him in his room. It took a while for him to calm down but he eventually did and he was acting fine for the rest of the night.Another example is suddenly refusing to go to school. He only goes twice a week and loves it, loves his teachers, always has so much fun. But now getting him out the door in the morning has become this insane battle with lots of screaming and door slamming and refusing to cooperate. Normally I would say "If you can't pick out shoes/get dressed/whatever, I will have to help you" and he will do it with some reluctance. But now it's just outright NO and kicking and screaming. It's very hard to force him to do things because he's very large for his age and very strong.What is going on! We are having crazy meltdowns like this multiple times a day... sometimes 5+ times a day. It's so utterly exhausting. I am pregnant and getting closer and closer to d-day, so my thought is maybe he's sensing the big changes coming and acting out. But all my normal tricks are just not working (like I can't say anything helpful or offer choices or reasoning of any kind because he just screams and screams over me) so I'm at a loss as to how to handle these and how to make it better. I hate seeing him have such a hard time and I hate feeling like I have zero patience left. When he's not flipping out, he's happy, bubbly, funny, and fun to be around.I'd appreciate any advice at all on this subject, especially from parents with kids that have an inherently "fiery" personality. via /r/Parenting http://bit.ly/2Wh3mnA
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