I'm struggling getting over the guilt. My mom raised me that bad mothers don't love their babies.At first I was obsessed doing everything perfect for my daughter. I did cloth diapers, pumped full time, and sanitize everything constantly while working full time. I didn't let my in-laws take her overnight for a break because I thought I would be a bad mom. Then when I made plans to kill myself so my husband could find a better mother, I admitted myself to the psych ward. She was 6 months old at this point.After I was discharged, I hated my daughter and blamed her for my PPD. I had to quit my job because I was too mentally broken. She stayed in daycare and my in-laws took her most nights. If I was alone with her, I did take care of her, but I didn't care for her.My daughter is now two and I have mostly put the pieces of my mental health together. I absolutely love her and she is attached to me.I'm still in therapy and on medication, but I cant get over this guilt of the sheer hatred I had for her. I'm crying now with shame. via /r/Parenting http://bit.ly/2I29dDU
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