I've been dating this person since September of 2017. He has taken us trick or treating both years, gone through two birthdays and Christmases with us, and moved in around January 2018. He helped me pick her up and drop her off at preschool while I worked, bought her a few toys, takes her out to eat when I have appointments, and makes her laugh all the time. Ever since she started to write, she always writes his name and draws pictures of him to hang up. I'm pretty sure it's safe to say she adores him. For the record, she's four and will turn five in October.I'm a few months pregnant and he has gotten quite different lately. I had pulled my daughter from school because I wasn't able to get up in the mornings to get her ready and living in an area where it reaches sub zero temperatures every morning for the next couple of months didn't help either, and he wasn't willing to help me take her to class every morning (which I completely understand!), coupled with the fact that she was being bullied by a boy in her class and three parent teacher conferences didn't help, it just felt like the best thing to do for us.Lately he's been saying things like, "If I bought my child a snack at the gas station would you expect me to buy one for your daughter?"So, my daughter's father isn't a good person. He hasn't been in her life since she was a small baby because he likes to do meth. I grew up with a drug addicted mother and know from experience how toxic it is. To make a very long story short, it's always been just my daughter and I. I don't talk to my family other than my dad because everyone else I know is addicted to drugs. My mother died from an overdose when I was in high school and it honestly made my life so much easier. What I'm trying to get at, all my daughter has is my dad and I. All I have is my dad and my daughter. That's how it's always been since she was born four years ago. So for her to be this attached and trusting of a male other than her grandfather always makes me want to tear up because although she never asks about her dad, she knows what a dad is from books, movies, etc and I know she questions it sometimes. My boyfriend knows all of this and he knows he's the closest to a father she's ever had.So for him to ask me this really caught me off guard. I answered, "Yes I would, because that's what you do for her now." He just replied, "Well, ain't my kid ain't my responsibility." Which... True. But given how much she loves him just put a sour taste in my mouth.He also started saying things like, "my kid's never gonna act like that." when she cries for a certain snack like, say, a popsicle before eating dinner, or when she's having a bad day and just wants to be held, or when she wants to talk to my dad over the phone and cries because she misses him. She's well controlled of her emotions and let's us know what's making her sad, angry, etc but he still gets annoyed by it.All of these comments started happening now that I'm pregnant and I just think it's weird. He just calls her "my ( as in me, not him) daughter" and won't call her by her name anymore. When I'm struggling with morning sickness and don't want to get up he won't feed her anymore. It's just weird and I've talked to him about it and all I get is "she's not my kid."Well recently he left due to an argument about how a girl messaged his phone asking if he was still going home later and the conversation was clearly deleted before that message, all in the middle of being told I needed to move to an apartment down the hall due to literal mold growing out of the ceiling in my old one, and I just started to cry and he packed his things and left.He messaged me today and told me he can't stand my daughter or my dad and he can't stand being home with us and it hurts. I have kind of a lot going on and it's just like hey you forgot the icing, here it is. I could go on about my depression and not getting medicated because pregnancy and how I throw up literally everything I eat and now there's mold in my old apartment and I'm moving by myself one laundry basket of stuff at a time and ugh. How do I respond to that?tldr; got pregnant, boyfriend now told me he doesn't like my first born. Don't know how to feel other than like garbage. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2GD3Rkf
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