Just to cover the build up to this...Ex from 10 years ago moved away and we broke up because of it. She was pregnant and never told me. She’s raised and cares for our son this whole time until contacting me recently because the kid wants a father like his friends.The first day I met him, we hit it off really well, but his mother left with him very quickly. She later agreed to a paternity test after I asked for one. At that point, it really seemed like she was going to make this difficult.That said, she ended up meeting with me and apologizing for what she’d done—not telling e about him, and rushing him away from me the first day we met. She actually admitted that she got scared I was going to ‘take my son from me’.I responded and told her that I’d do my very best to forgive, but that I’m going to do everything I can to be in his life as a positive influence. I may have missed the chance to ever be “Dad” but I can be a good person in his life and I’ll take what I can get at this point. I also told her that the apology that needs to happen at some point is her apologizing to him.Part of what hurt about this so much was that I didn’t have a father growing up either. I struggled with that and I’ve wanted to be a father since I was young, I just never met a partner to do it with.She agreed, cried, hugged me. But went on to tell me how he fell in love with me the day we met. He’s told all of his friends and he’s constantly been talking about his dad (He calls me “dad” to her and his friends but he only says “sir” to me).Yesterday she called him off school and I spent the day with him, one-on-one, just driving around and doing whatever we wanted.So yesterday he got up like normal and got ready for school but when he came outside I was waiting in the rental car for him.We went and had breakfast then we just got in the car and drove. We talked about school and what was happening in his life in school and I shared a couple stories from when I was his age. I’ve got to say, it’s a pretty unique feeling to tell a, to me, mundane story from 6th grade and to watch him laugh his head off.When we got in the car we talked sports. He asked me what sports I played as a kid and what a did now (I do bodybuilding. I don’t compete or anything, but I do have a pretty athletic frame) I told him I did bodybuilding and he got excited about that and asked me if I could teach him to lift weights and this was my favorite moment of the day because he came extremely close to calling me his dad.He said: “Will you teach me how to lift weights? Well, you are my....I mean...you have to teach me stuff it’s like your job.”Eventually, we drove past a sporting goods store and we went in. I bought a couple balls, a glove for each of us, and then we went to a park and played catch for a few hours.After that I took him for BBQ and then dropped him off at home.He was too shy to ask me, but he had his mom call me and ask me to pick him up from baseball practice tomorrow.I’m still trying to keep my hopes low but I’m really happy about yesterday. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2qGOjST
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