Advice with responsibility roles; feeling frustrated

My husband and I have been together for about 12 years, married for 4. We have 2 kids; ages 3 and 1. I am fortunate enough that I do not have to go work. My husbands business has done well and our life is comfortable. I have however chosen to work casual and prebook myself about 5 shifts a month. This allows me to keep my license and provides me with a little break from being a mom. I really do love my job and I don’t want to stop being a nurse. My problem is whenever I book my shifts, asking my husband to watch the kids is near impossible. I always get the “I don’t know” or “we’ll see”. He runs a business so I know he doesn’t have a set schedule, and clients/work comes first. I do have a regular sitter for the kids but she is away this month and can’t always watch the kids at other times. Our parents live close enough, but I don’t want to overuse them and burn them out. I’ve even been asked by him “who’s working here? Me or you?” I’m grateful for our life but they’re not just my children. He can pick up and go at any minute without a thought and I feel like I’m constantly scrambling to have some sort of life, precariously balanced between babysitters. I’ve tried to talk with him but it usually ends up in a fight (I easily get quite frustrated and either shut down or blowup). I just want a little more fairness on the child care end of this? Am I being unreasonable? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2olZLlh