I Don't Think I Know Everything BUT...

A little history on me.I never wanted kids. Hated them in fact. Little snot nosed, curtain climbing, cookie crumbling, pains in the ass. Why would a single guy want to deal with that nonsense? Especially one that worked in the club business that was full of free booze and all the women he could eat?Then BOOM my GF at the time (who I was kicking out on the next weekend or at least that was the plan) turns up preggo. Well shit. Now I'm old school. You make a child you bite the bullet and take care of them. So I did the 'honorable' thing and married her. I made a kid and I didn't want to deal with the guilt of just mailing her money every month while she paraded a plethora of 'new daddies' through her trailer every month.The funny thing is, once he was born, he really grew on me. The smiles, the hugs, just the simple act of giving him his bottle was a pleasure. It was WEIRD. Here I was this nightclub DJ of relative fame could be melted by a baby.The one night that sticks in my memory because, by that time, she waited until I got home from my day job to 'run to Wal Mart' (AKA meet her boyfriends and yes plural) so we built a bond. I was headed to work at the club and he was screaming 'no daddy no please don't leave'. It broke my damn heart and I had one of the worst nights as a DJ I ever had.Fast forward to when I caught her cheating. It took me six months but I got custody. I left the club and marketing / promotions life. I loved it but I loved him more. So I got a real job and did okay with it. Put him in a very good day care and couldn't wait to see him at the end of the day.Over the next 18 years I invested myself in him. Oh sure I had my friends on the internet some of which I'm still friends with to this day but he was my focus. I can't tell you how much it makes me smile to remember playing 007 with him on his N64, tucking him in, and saying 'thanks for killing me tonight'. Watching Cheers with him until he fell asleep, learning about Pokemon, watching 'So Weird' and 'The Famous Jett Jackson' on Sunday nights.As he grew older I tried to keep up with his interests. I didn't know Jack about Harry Potter until he got into it. I started reading the books and, before long, every time a book came out I'd buy the CD's for me and the books for him (he preferred reading). We still discuss it to this day. He's 23 now by the way and pretty successful.Sorry for the ramble folks but, if you love someone, you invest yourself in them. You find out what their passion is and learn about it. It gives you the opportunity to discuss it with them and learn more about what makes them tick. Not only that but it shows you care about what they care about.Do I have regrets? Yes. Did I make mistakes? Yes. But my son and I are extremely close. Using the same formula I landed a, now, wife that is so out of my league that every time I look at her I wonder what the hell she's doing with me because she could do so much better. I didn't 'use' my formula to land her but I found out what she was passionate about and learned about it. It allows us to have conversations that she's actively engaged and interested in same as it was with my son. Frankly without him around I wouldn't have known what 'Harry Potter' or 'Pokemon' was unless I made the effort to learn. I did and it garnered literally thousands of hours of fun and discussion that drew us closer together.Of course that's just my opinion. I could be wrong.By the way I do love this sub. I miss being a 'daddy'. Anybody can be a father or a mother. It takes a bit of effort to be a 'mommy' or a 'daddy'. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2GoQErY

Spacing between babies/what’s the best /what worked for your families

Hello!TL;DR what age gap did you find works best for your family ?I have an almost 3 month old baby boy. Last week I watched my friends 1 year old son while her daycare was out sick. While I definitely wouldn’t want two babies 9 months apart I’m kind of leaning towards a closer age gap (1.5 years). I’ve read that sibling rivalry isn’t really present with that age gap and to get all the baby years out of the way would be great.My husband and I work opposite shifts but are thinking of part time Montessori preschool when our son is 18 months.I don’t plan on going back to work until my son is 13 months old.What age gap did you choose and why? How many kids did you end up having ?TIA via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2DVKOjy

I (18F) fear having child with husband (18M) has ruined our lives.

My husband and I have been together for 2 years , a month after our one year anniversary we found out we were pregnant. It was a whirlwind of emotions , we were still in high school and we were just two young teenagers who weren’t being safe 🤷🏽‍♀️ The pregnancy was in no way planned and we didn’t really know what to do. We decided to get married and raise our son together , we are now 2 months into being new parents and it seems like things are constantly bad . He is in the last stretch of technical training and then we will be together and officially starting our lives with one another , the only this is I am afraid to do this . I feel like we are not compatible or happy, our relationship has been filled with so many ups and downs and I’m not sure he is actually person I was meant to end up with . I want my son to be in a happy and healthy two parent home and but I feel like I have to make myself small and silence myself to avoid fights with my husband. I worry we are only going to grow apart and it is going to effect the life of our little bundle via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2DKcM2z

Infertile friend critical of my parenting

TL;DR : friend critical of my parenting while she doesn’t have kids/ is going through fertility treatments.So one of my good friends is going through fertility treatments, whereas I got pregnant by accident (not trying on BC pill). Throughout my pregnancy I was always careful not to complain about any symptoms I had to her because I always felt like it would make her feel shitty. Even after I had my baby I was always there answering her calls / texts about her fertility experiences. Sometimes I would be extremely sleep deprived but I didn’t want to add insult to injury that I was tired because I had something she wanted.Anyways, I’m noticing she’s becoming more and more critical of my parenting. When she first met my baby she looked at his pacifier and said “oh what’s your mom doing”. When I ended up co sleeping with him because I had a c section and couldn’t get up to get him from his crib and I sent her a picture of him lying peacefully beside me she said “hmm that’s not his crib”. I have a cat and she’s been great with the baby and I sent pictures of them together and her response was “seems like the cat is trying to smother the baby”Mostly I just ignore it and tell myself that it’s the fertility treatments talking but just curious as to what everyone else would do /say. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2rM3Nbt

Son 16months doesnt like his dad. Any advice?

Hello parents of Reddit. Our little one is 16months old, he's a warm hearted little boy and seems to be developing well. He's especially affectionate with me and the lady who cares for him during the day (My husband and I both work full time) and with basically any other women he meets. He's generally distrusting of stange men, which I guess is ok for a very young boy, but it's definitely not just a gender thing as he adores his grandpa. He loves to give hugs and kisses to me, granny and nanny but when his dad tries to do it he gets pushed away and generally, a wail. He won't look daddy in the face, wont be held by daddy when I'm there and though he does play with his dad he's rarely affectionate with him. His rejection of daddy seems to be much worse when I'm around which makes us think perhaps he's jealous of his dad. My husband is a really lovely, warm and social guy, we are affectionate to eachother and in front of our boy. He tries to put on a brave face and not react to our son being cold but I know it kills him, and it worries me. For sure his dad could give him more attention, but it's obviously disheartening when he gets nothing back. Any ideas or suggestions? Should I try and be less affectionate to my husband in front of our kid? Is this just a phase he'll grow out of, and if so, any ideas when? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2DKlj1j

Awkward child safety situation with wife's family

Looking for some advice on how to handle this awkward situation. My wife's family is very focused on child safety and frown upon anything that involves even the smallest risks for the kids. Today I was playing with our two kids and took a photo of them in a slightly risky position. I thought it was a cute photo and instantly texted it to her family. As soon as my wife saw it she freaked out and yelled at me "how could you show that photo to them! They will think you're so stupid!". Within seconds her brother had responded with a predictable "That's so unsafe..." lecture. Now my wife thinks her whole family is horrified and I should accept blame and somehow apologize. I don't want to apologize for playing with my kids. She thinks I should at least say something like "I already got yelled at". If I don't say something, this situation may get awkward the next time we all meet. How should I handle it and respond to her family? For context, what I did was I put our 6-week old newborn in a doll stroller and let our 2-year old toddler pretend like she's pushing the stroller while I took the photo. In theory the doll stroller could have tipped over, but I was very careful about not letting the toddler walk by herself, and inches away in case anything happened.... via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2EiYbbj

Son isn't taking his medical condition seriously and thinks we are being overprotective.

Throwaway for privacy reasonsMy son (13) has osteogenisus imperfecta ("brittle bone" disease) Type 1. This is considered to be the mildest form of OI and on the surface he looks normal. He has some discoloration of the eyes, is a bit shorter than average, and has mild hearing loss in one ear but those don't really jump out to people. His bones do break easily and often, however. He also has more dislocations and sprains than the average person. Growth spurts have resulted in breaks. Simple falls have resulted in breaks. Jumping from moderate heights have resulted in breaks. He also has to be careful with his spine since it is slightly curved and is more prone to fractures.Although hearing his diagnosis made us want to send him to school in bubble wrap, we have fought against those desires. We enrolled him in swimming to help him keep his strength. This started an interest in sports. He is really limited in what he can play and can't do anything involving contact or jumping. He instead channels his competitive energy into swimming and table tennis.Our issue is disagreements about certain risk. One of his friends invited him to a trampoline park a couple of months ago. I told my son he could go but made him promise to not do more than simply jumping. He promised and went back on that promise once at the park. He ended up with a broken ankle. He is out of the cast now and went to a friends house yesterday. The friend's mom called me to let me know that he was play wrestling with her sons in the basement. She knows about his condition and I told her to call if she sees him doing something he shouldn't be. My son was upset that she told me and upset at me for telling her to call. Another friend is having a birthday party at the trampoline park next month and I told my son that he can only go if I come to supervise. My son stormed off and said he would rather not even go.He thinks we are being overprotective but we are just trying to keep him safe. I can't let him risk fracturing his neck, spine, or skull. All of his breaks have been relatively minor and sometimes he didn't even notice them (broken hip went unnoticed for days, broken fingers have gone completely unnoticed and have healed crooked), so I think that is contributing to his belief that we are being overprotective for no good reason.Any advice on how to handle this? Our house becomes somewhat of a warzone when we don't allow him to do something that his friends or siblings can. I want to respect his feelings of unjust and unfairness but we need to be smart about his condition. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2DIGT67