How do I get my toddler to leave the house more quickly?

My son is three years old, and it has always taken us forever to leave the house. I would say it takes me about 45 minutes to get him dressed and go — on a good day. This does not include the time that I take to prepare his lunch, eat breakfast, and get ready myself. From the time I wake up to the time we leave, it’s over two hours. It is such a colossal waste of time.He loves the attention and control, and it drives me insane. I also feel like he is not attention starved, so it bothers me even more because I do give him a ton of attention.The only thing that works, and it doesn’t even work all that well, is when I pretend to leave. I tell him that I have to go and that if he wants to come, he has to put on his clothes. I tell him I’m going to get the keys and open the door to the garage. Then he will finally say he wants to put his clothes on, but then when I go to put them on, he stalls and changes his mind or refuses to choose his clothes. So I tell him I don’t have time for that and pretend to go again, and it repeats. If I put on clothes that he doesn’t choose, he has a meltdown, and we waste even more time. I’ve tried bribery. I’ve even tried chocolate as a reward, or small toys. They work once and then it is the same as before. I’ve tried consequences like not having a play date later. He gets upset but doesn’t seem to modify his behavior. I’ve tried letting him watch and iPad in the car, and we don’t really do TV at home, so even that treat seems lost on him.The only other way that I am able to get him in the car easily it is to wake him and change his clothes before he knows what’s going on and put him in the car. But I feel bad doing this because it seems to interfere with your sleep pattern. He then seems to nap longer at daycare and then is harder to put to bed at night.One small timesaver is that I will let him wear the same shirt as his pajamas. This is not much of a timesaver. To get him ready for bed at night, it’s a little bit easier because I tell him that I’m going to go to sleep without him if he doesn’t put on his clothes and that my being there while he falls asleep is a privilege and not a right. I hate that my only way to get him to do what I want is to threaten to leave. On the other hand, it involves fewer tears than what my husband does, which is the endless cycle of time out. My husband also doesn’t care if my son wears dirty clothes, and I just can’t do that. He has to change his clothes at least once a day.I should say that I’m not a very strict parent, and I’m not comfortable being very strict because I had a strict and abusive mom. But I am open to anything other than time out. via /r/Parenting http://bit.ly/2RaJWhI