I just don't know what to do anymore. I can't handle him.He's 28 months old and he says about 3 words consistently. I took him to Early Intervention and explained that he doesn't understand or respond to basic "commands" for lack of a better word ie. "Go get your shoes," "Go get in your chair," etc. He doesn't pay attention to anyone speaking to him, he doesn't focus on anything, he can't hold still even to eat, the only time he's still is when he's watching Superwhy or videos of simulated car crashes which are his favorite and the only way I can get anything done.They told me he's developmentally 6-8 months old. They sent a woman to my house on Monday to "help" us and she very clearly didn't read his file because she suggested we don't change his diaper until he goes and gets it himself, we don't leave the house until he gets his own shoes... I told he doesn't understand when I talk to him, he's never repeated words back to us, he's never shown any sign of comprehension when you speak to him. She said we need to say "banana" when we give him a banana, we need to say "car" when he's playing with his cars... (obviously we've done this since he was a baby). Then she said "He's never going to learn to speak if you don't give him the words." She said she'll come back in 2 weeks and evaluate him again to see if me doing her suggestions has helped him but that he won't improve if I don't do what she said... I've been doing what she said since he was a baby and he's never caught on...She said she would email me the contact info for further services provided by IE bc she forgot the paper on her desk, but its been 3 days and I haven't gotten any email yet.I just feel so defeated. I honestly think he needs an autism diagnosis, he checks a lot of boxes (poop smearing, hand flapping, absolute meltdowns, always in his own world not acknowledging anyone else...) I KNOW this isn't my fault even though she heavily implied it, I always am with him, I'm always talking to him, playing with him, showing him things and "giving him words," he's just not capable of understand them or using them.I feel so sad for my baby because I can tell he's frustrated that he can't communicate what he wants. My family acts like he is just a bad, misbehaved child and I need to spank him until he learns to listen, nobody understands him and I feel so bad for him. My husband works 12 hours a day just to keep us alive and is never home. Nobody will babysit because he's so "bad" and doesn't listen.I know I need to get him the help he needs but I'm feeling so defeated after IE didn't end up being much help. I also feel so helpless, I suffer from depression and this all feels so overwhelming. I'm incredibly poor (struggling to pay the rent, overdrafting my bank account to keep the electricity on, constantly borrowing money from my mom, no groceries besides canned food from the church) and I don't have a driver's license so I can't make him the appointments he needs with all these specialists who are 30 miles away and probably aren't even 100% covered by insurance anyway, and any day my husband takes off work is another month we'll miss a bill or be short on rent. We need every cent of his paycheck and again... I can't drive. My son has medicaid but they never sent me his card even though I've called and requested it multiple times.Everyone keeps telling me he'll get better on his own, "all kids develop at their own rate" etc but this isn't normal slow development, I KNOW he needs more help and I just don't know where to start and even if I did I don't have the means to help him anyway, I can't drive, I can't pay any doctor, I can barely get out of bed. I just want to sleep all day and night.I know my poor baby deserves better than this, he deserves a mother who can properly provide for him and get him the help he needs. I feel so guilty and frustrated with myself. And I feel so bad any time I get frustrated with him because it's my fault he isn't getting any better. He's such a sweet and loving boy. He just cant talk to us or understand us and it's my fault he's not getting any better because I never should have brought him into this world without the means to care for him properly. I feel like I doomed him to a shitty life forever.Just a vent. Sorry. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2Ir6BhY
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