A bad morning and it doesn't look like the afternoon paints much better

I barely got any sleep last night. Crying babies plus anxiety about stupid things I shouldn't be anxious about (when is anxiety any different?). But of course the twins don't care and daddy has to go to work.I had my usual morning routine with them: "learning time" (which is basically a more focused play time... nothing crazy because they're little) followed by free play time and then a story time which would usually lead to me getting them ready for their first nap. But guys... They're in their high chairs playing with bread because I can't. I can't deal with them today because I am exhausted, I am having major anxiety attacks and honestly I was so horrible to them all day. I just have no patience because I am so anxious and I know that's not an excuse but I had to leave them in their room a couple of times and call my sister crying asking her to just tell me I'm not a shit mom.I feel I can't do this and I need more help but my MIL is not to be trusted with the boys alone and she's a pain in the ass and my mom is an ocean away and my dad is mentally unstable and I just want to lie in bed and cry.Want to know the worst part? I'm going back to work but get this BRIGHT AS FUCK IDEA me and my husband had. I worked at an academy/day care near by (I'm a teacher) by and they're retiring me with a new schedule. Get this! I start working in September from 4:30 to 9:00 and my husband works from 7:00 to 3:30 which means we will see each other for about an hour a day while dealing with TODDLERS on our own the REST OF THE TIME. WE ARE IDIOTS.Please someone tell me it's going to be okay. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2KHYoH4