[Advice] Disagreeing about how and when to help an adult child "launch"

I'm a stepparent of 14 years to a now 20 year old. 20 year old has been living "full time" with my partner and I for the past four years but there is another coparent in the picture. Stepchild has always had challenges with anxiety.Stepchild graduated high school almost 2 years ago. After high school, they went to college and after worked as a baker. Full time work in that field turned out to be hard on the body and stressful. They left that job and now are currently looking for a new job. When I last talked to them about ideal work, they wanted a cafe/ barista position with the possibility of baking in the back, ideally 15 to 30 hours a week.I'm starting to feel desperate about moving stepchild towards more responsibility and independence. Having them around after high school for the past 2 years has felt like having a teenager on extended summer holidays. Who knows when they are home, doesn't help with chores around the house, gross smelly bedroom upstairs, for weeks ++ at a time there are loads of their dirty laundry downstairs just waiting around.I don't want to live like this with an adult child of 25 or 30. While that's 5-10 years away, it feels like an all too real possibility. We live in an expensive city in terms of rent.Edited to add: Partner has conversations with stepchild about next steps, reminding and coaching about laundry, possible chores, etc. It feels like these often happen after my prompting. As a result, child is now paying for own cell phone and transportation which is a win, but feels leagues beyond the goal. I feel like I'm going nuts.Are my expectations out of line? How should or could I be handling this better? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2JU7T6u