My 21-year old daughter is sometimes really a pain in the a**, but I can't do anything because I'm scared of her mental health

I love my daughter -- of course I do. But she is not an easy child. Her first 10 years were totally fine, and just like her other siblings, but from 13 and up until now, I see myself less and less able to understand her.She has been depressed ever since 13-ish because of her father, my husband. The two always fought and our home was a seriously awful place to be at times. She went from being outgoing, doing well in everything and witty, to being angry, sad, sleeping all the time, ditching school... You get the drill.She has a job, but she spends all her money and is always broke. I give her money because I'm terrified she will get even more depressed and do something stupid, if she goes 100% broke. She is not interested in her future, has no ambitions, has pushed away all of her friends and is essentially just "surviving" life. No interests; no nothing. She recently started seeing a therapist on her own initiative (yay!), but it seems as though it only makes her sadder.She had moved out, but when her contract ended she moved back home with us. The situation with her around is really not okay, I'm not being irrational but she brings down the mood of everyone. Doesn't clean, drives my car and bulks it - doesn't say anything more than "I hate cars, I think I'll stop driving them forever now", sits around all night, comes to talk and demand my attention whenever she feels like it.She is a rational-thinking person, I know she is; but I don't know what to do about her. I came over a book in her room a week ago that she wrote to use in therapy, and she had listed all the problems she thought she needed help with. Including, but not limited to: Eating disorder(binge eating), depression, suicidal thoughts(she wrote that she thinks about it 3-4 hrs per week), no friends, no ambition, that she only stays alive for family's sake but really just wants to move away from everything etc.etc.etc.The situation is not okay at the moment. I know what will be good for her is going to university, to get into a new environment and get some self-esteem from having some sort of degree. But she doesn't want to. Ideally I would lovingly kick her out of the house and stop giving money all the time; not just for my own sake, but for HER sake, but I'm paralyzed from doing anything when I read that she is suicidal. I cannot tell her I know these things, because she already thinks I am untrustworthy and goes through her things.What can I do? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2vwdK9X