Being a Step Dad that isn’t a step dad

My wife’s best friend has a daughter of 3. She and her mom live with us and “rent” our spare room. Her sperm donor isn’t in the picture in anyway, shape or form. I have loved and helped to raise this little girl along with my two biological children ages 2 and 4. I came to the realization last night as I lay in bed; someday, her mom is going to meet someone. Someone special who is going to love them and take care of them and be everything they deserve. I’m okay with that; in fact I want it for them. I want that little girl to grow and be the best that I already know she can be. However that also comes with the heartbreak that one less little girl is going to be greeting me at the door after work with a hug and smile. One less little girl is going to be jumping from her bed to my arms when I put them to bed. One less little girl is going to come wake all of us on Christmas morning because Santa visited in the night. No more bathing three little terrors, no more brushing her hair and comforting her when she’s sick or sad. This is heartbreaking because I chose to love her. I chose to help care for her and help raise her. I chose to be a placeholder Dad so she would see what her mom deserved in a husband and what she deserved in a Dad. Now I’m not blowing my own horn; I have my flaws and faults; we all do. But to my kids, I’m a hero. I’m the best version of me. I can do no wrong and I’ll always be there for them even though someday it’ll be up to them. This isn’t a problem, more an epiphany and airing out what I know is there. I know she won’t be one of my three forever, at least not in my home forever. And please don’t mistake me; I love all of my kids with everything I am; but I won’t have to come to terms with them leaving for another decade plus. It may be sooner for her and her mom. So in short, for all the step parents on this Christmas Eve; all the men and women who chose to raise someone that wasn’t from your own body, who work tirelessly and trudge on and be the parents you didn’t have to be. You’re all heroes and heroines. The very best of what we as a species can be. Merry Christmas. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2promZp