Being a working mom

Ok I don’t even know where to start.After a year and a half I finally reached out. I realize now that I had post partum but was always too ashamed to admit it. I needed help. My husband is very supportive and caters to me and his daughter. Something just has been amiss since I had her.We almost split up. I tried to kill myself several different times. I would lie awake thinking of ways to end my anxiety and soul shaking fear.It started when I had to go back to work. I felt so overwhelmed. I shut everyone out (parents, friends, in laws, colleagues). I was such a bitch. I just thought that if I were with my baby 24/7 my life would be the best life.I was recently prescribed Xanax and sleeping pills. I’ve always been against this stuff because addiction runs in my family. And I was raised souther Baptist (not a good look for a souther/Baptist teacher from the heart of the delta in the deep south). There’s so much stigma attached to not being able to be “super mom” (handling it all without a sweat). I think that’s a universal theme with being a modern mother.Honestly my medication has helped my marriage and every other relationship in my life. I had the best day today. It was just a normal day. I went to work. Came home. Made dinner. Enjoyed my family. Spoke to my dad on the phone.I’m sorry if you read this and wasted your time. I’m not looking for attention. I just hope someone out there is going what I went through and sees that there are professionals to help. If you do subscribe to religion, just know that God is the one that created doctors. God helps those that helps them self (if you don’t subscribe, still know that you are worth seeking help).Life does get better. Being a mom is the hardest thing most people will ever do. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done.(I planned my pregnancy, was married, and had a good job—I just didn’t realize everything that would come along with being a working mom. I love my child and family. Just to be clear)Hate on if you want, but I just feel like sharing. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2n1pv5w