Co-Sleeping, the best...or the absolute worst?

my wife and i have an 18 month boy and a freshly turned 4 year old. since the birth of our girl (4 years ago) my wife fought for a co-sleeping or family bed situation. i reluctantly agreed, heeding the rumors that co-sleeping is "no-sleeping".Now after those 4 years, I'm sort of waking up and assessing the toll it seems to be having on us. Any other co-sleepers out there? I'm curious to see if we're alone in this and our situation is unique and should be adjusted somehow, or if its part of the plan and the way it goes if you want to co-sleep.I'm feeling our co-sleeping situation has led us down a path that hasn't been very healthy for our relationship. It has created a situation where our kids (on average) don't sleep for more than about 1.5 hours without waking up and looking for mom. If she isn't there, they freak out and won't settle. Which, to my wife, is fine because it's better than sleep training, cry-it-out etc. So she goes in and either nurses our boy, or settles our girl back to sleep.Over time I'm realizing, this routine has had an impact on our sex lives, social life and overall relationship. It's hard to have any intimate time with 2 kids in the bed. It's hard to get a babysitter because kids need mom to be there when they wake. This keeps us from going on overnight trips with friends because mom doesn't really have much fun because the nights are so unpredictable. And in the end, no one is really getting much sleep so we're all a little cranky. Especially my wife.Nightly routine, before going to bed we make a little cooler bag of two 4oz bottles of milk our 4 year old will wake up for. Usually two or three bottles in a night. This is probably 6 nights a week. Our 18 month old seems to be constantly nursing and waking up every 2 hours-ish.This doesn't seem normal to me, and when I bring it up that the kids don't seem to be great sleepers, my wife defends it by saying "oh, he had to poop" "his stomach was bothering him" "this is just how toddlers are"Am I alone or off-base in thinking this is a little out of control? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2lHPz52