A couple days ago, my son (7 m in 2nd grade) came home from school and complained about another boy who pushed him on the playground and is mean to him. He seemed quite upset about it and so I wrote a note to his teacher to get an idea of what is going on. I figured it was just a misunderstanding or a game that got too rough at recess.Well, the teacher called and said the other boys mom had also wrote to her about my son and pretty much said my son has been “attacking” her son. In PE her son ended up with a scratch from my son when playing basketball and apparently my son attacked her son and did it on purpose. On top of that he has been being mean to her son throughout the school day at recess and lunch.So the teacher said from what she sees, the PE incident was an accident and the game just got overly rough. Also, she said my son is not a bad kid at school and they don’t sit near each other. She said she talked to both boys and by yesterday at lunch they were actually eating lunch next to each other.Now, I know my son. I know he isn’t perfect and I have seen him be mean to his little sister. He can be very sneaky about it. He is also a sensitive kid who has come home crying in the past because kids were mean to him on the bus.When he got home, I talked to him and asked him has he been a bully to the other kid and he said yes. He said he has been saying not nice things to him. When I asked why he said he wanted to be cool in front of his friends. I told him they weren’t very good friends if he had to be mean to someone else to be their friend. I reminded him how he felt in the past when someone was mean to him and he agreed he felt really bad. We talked for a while about what bullying was and that it would not be tolerated at all. I took his book fair books he bought yesterday and said he could get them back when I saw he was being nicer. He wrote a letter apologizing to the other kid. I helped him write it and made sure it stayed on task. He said he was very sorry for being mean to him and saying mean things. He did it to be cool, but it wasn’t cool at all. He was sorry and would not do it again. He hoped they could start being friends.I also wrote a note to the teacher saying that my son had been being mean to the other child and to please let me know if he continues or is mean to anyone at all.I am hoping to nip this in the bud immediately. I always felt so bad for my son when he was being picked on, but as this time he is the bully it feels pretty crappy too and almost worse. I feel like I failed as a parent.I am considering writing a letter to the other mom apologizing for my son and letting her know that I do not condone the behavior and would make sure it came to a stop. I am not sure if she would want a letter from her sons bully’s mom? Any other advice on how to curtail this behavior? My son is grounded and we will be continuing to check with his teacher about his behavior.TL;DR: My son is bullying another kid. I am trying to stop it now and had some write a letter to the boy. Should I write a note to the mother letting her know I am sorry and do not condone the behavior. Any other advice? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/31JpCF5
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