Conficted about how to support 11yo gay trans daughter

My daughter came out as gay this summer to me (dad) and her mother. I'm not surprised as I noticed changes in her style and interests since puberty hit about a year ago, but I kind of wasn't prepared for all this might entail and how I'd feel about it. My daughter hasn't really wanted to talk about it much, either--she came out after her mom (we live separately) looked at her youtube watch history and started asking questions.I just feel guilty somewhat, because I have always thought I would be fine with my daughter being gay--and mostly I am--but I wasn't ready for her to say she identifies as trans, too, and I'm finding it difficult to reconcile my hesitancy and my own personal preference of how I'd like my daughter to present herself, with her eagerness to move forward with changing her appearance.So far I know she says she is uncomfortable as a girl and feels more like a boy, and wants to present herself as one. I don't know if she feels strongly enough to want a gender reassignment. It's tricky because she doesn't want to be out with the rest of my family, but she wants to tell friends at school she's a boy. She obviously won't be able to have it both ways for long.For my part, I simply wouldn't want to change the daughter I have, and if she ever wanted to be called "he" and "him," I'd have a hard time handling that. It could be coming. Mostly I'm venting. But I don't want my daughter to go full throttle into a transgender identity without taking more time to consider this. Perhaps it's only me that's confused, but it is clear to me that gender identity and sexual identity can be quite complicated, and at 11 years old, while she's old enough to be certain about some things, she's still young enough to be confused. I wonder whether she could be more of a butch lesbian than necessarily trans (I don't think they're the same). That said, I've bought her a binder which she wears fairly regularly, and I'll probably get her another one (she's ok with the one she has, but wants an even tighter fit). She also wants to cut her hair really short, and make it like a boy's style. I'm actually posting this now while we're supposed to be going out to find a place where she wants to get her hair cut. If we don't do it today, we'll probably get it done tomorrow. And I know I'm much more nervous about it than she is.Are there any other parents in the same boat? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2wIZ64p