I have 4 kids, 3 step and one biological. The step-kids mom ditched them when they were very young, and the youngest of the two only have memories of her via Skype; they call me by my name, but list me as 'mom' on school work, and introduce me to friends as "Nildro, my mom", which I always get a kick out of. The oldest one was nearly school age when her mother left however, and still refers to me as 'dads girlfriend', even after I've been married to her dad for more then half of her life.When this kid (kid "A") was 8, she would do this thing where she'd walk into a room of adults and say "how's my hair look??". Her hair would always be sticking up in all directions, obviously laboriously teased to get that way. But if you said "lovely!" (Thinking it was some kind of game) She'd stamp her foot, yell 'liar!' And run away crying. If you said something to the effect of 'we'll, it obviously needs a brush...' she'd yell 'I hate you!' And run away. This behaviour was annoying, but she was 8, so whatever. Now she's 15. She'll walk into a room, say "how's my project?" Then hand you something either missing all of the important points of the paper, or obvious plagiarism. Her reactions to your response are indentical to her responses when she was 8. Literally. I've tried to restrain other adults from "comforting" her after these events because that's the obvious motive, but they keep doing it, usually proceeding to 'fixing' her paper on top of it. She belongs to a HUGE extended family and interacts with at least 6 supportive adults on the DAILY, so please don't suggest she just needs more attention. Something deeper is happening here.When my husband comes home, he greets all his kids with a hug, then greets me. We're married, he obviously gives me a kiss, then will hold me for a bit and we'll have a chat. It always ends with kid A getting uncomfortably close; like, wayyyy too close, until we break up. "Yes?" My husband asks her. Then she'll either huff and walk away (sniffling loudly if she couldn't actually produce tears), or else she will throw her arms around him just like I do, kiss him almost on the lips, then try to have a nearly identical chat to the one we were just having.If we're holding hands at a parade, she follows right behind, and when I go to attend to a younger kid, she grabs his hand.If we're hanging out watching telly after everyone's ment to be in bed, she had a 'nightmare' and has to cuddle his shoulder for 45 minutes.I've taken her to two different therapists, who insist she's normal. How. How is she normal.I'm listing the "creepy" ones, because they're the ones I feel NEED to be addressed, but frankly, this kid is just one annoying behaviour after another on top of it. The other adults treat her like she's got a disability (and act like I'm being fridged) her younger siblings treat HER like a younger sibling, and for some reason i will never understand, she is insanely popular among her peers. I was here since she was 7. I've witnessed with my 2 eyes the source of the problem, and that's that everyone felt bad for her that she lost her mom, and never pulled her up or corrected her on ANYTHING. And at the risk of sounding like Hank Hill, she's just got no character because of it, and no self esteem because she's got no character. She clings to those she likes, everyone else can go to hell, and she never tries to be better, because she's already perfect, while paradoxically hating herself. And because of how TIGHTLY she clings to my husband, it's always in my face. My husband is the joy of my life. My kids (her younger siblings included) are my purpose. Yet I'm tempted, as she gets older and older and keeps insisting she's going to stay here with 'daddy' forever, to leave, if it means getting away from her. I'm not. But help me out here.Please please help me.TL;DR: my eldest plays weird power games with me over my husband, among every other attention seeking behaviour in the book, it's just very weird. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2oVekPw
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