I have a 3 yo boy who is attached at the hip to me. I honestly believe it's because I'm the one who listens to him and spends time with him the most. For instance, when my son wakes up from a nightmare I'm the one who comes to get him. Usually I'm on the complete opposite end of the house and my husband plays video games in the room next to his. But I'm the one who comes in to comfort him when he wakes up crying, on an almost nightly basis.In general my husband is horrible at comforting. My son had his penis operated in last August and I had to fly out of state with him to have it done. On the way back he refused to pee because it hurt and held it until he couldn't hold it anymore and peed all over me while I was running him to the bathroom during our layover. Stupid me didn't pack spare clothes for either of us and we had to fly home soaked in pee. The first thing I did when I got home was treat his urine soaked incision on his penis which obviously made him cry. Then I asked my husband to comfort him while I changed out of my own urine soaked clothes. I was gone 3 minutes and when I came back in my son was hysterical on the couch by himself and my husband was making popcorn. I asked him, "weren't you supposed to be comforting him?" To which he replied, "I tried but he wouldn't stop crying. So obviously me holding him didn't matter."I wanted to give these examples to set the tone for tonight. I truly believe if my husband was more nurturing toward our son that I wouldn't always have to be on kid duty.So our son has been sick for the past 10 days and he's been sleeping in our bed at night. Tonight he woke up an hour after I put him to bed and so I had to cuddle him to get him back to sleep. Every time I would try to get up to take a shower my son would start to cry, so I kept cuddling with him longer and longer trying to get him to go to a deeper sleep so I could shower.At midnight my husband came in and I told him I'd been trying to shower but our son kept waking up and that I'd still hoped to shower tonight. He said fine and went to bed. At 1 I decided, fuck it, I'm just going to rush through a shower and if he cries he cries. So I hoped in the shower. Five minutes in I hear crying, then a stern voice, then hysterical crying and finally the bathroom door opens and my hysterical toddler is shoved inside and the door closes. This obviously feels really shitty to him and he goes full blown hysterical. I can't do much but reassure him as I quickly wash the soap out of my hair and towel off.I came out of the shower livid. I was telling my husband that he's our child. Not a roommates annoying pet that you shove in their room for them to deal with. His defense was that he tried "for five minutes" to comfort our son but he just kept screaming for me. Frankly, even if that's true IDGAF. If he made more of an effort all the time our son wouldn't react that way toward him. Even if he did, there are a million better ways to handle that situation. Rock him in the chair, walk around the house with him, or even letting him be hysterical in bed while you attempt to rub his back while laying down with your eyes closed (I've been guilty of this on a few occasions). But shoving him in the bathroom so you can go back to bed is cruel to him and to me.I kicked my husband out of the bed and now I'm getting ready to go to sleep while my 3 yo sleeps in the crook of my arm. Frankly, I'm sitting here imaging my world as a single parent and wondering if it'd be all that bad.TL; DR: my husband has a long history of no patience with our toddler and when our toddler woke up crying tonight he just shoved him in the bathroom where I was taking a shower so he could go back to bed. I kicked him out of the bedroom and now I'm questioning my life. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2nSTYVL
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