Wait until your father gets home

My wife has started doing that dreaded 'wait until your father gets home' thing. I think that it sucks and I feel completely justified in thinking that it sucks. My wife thinks 'but parenting is teamwork and I need you to back me up'. Yes, sure, but I also think that sometimes there's solo expeditions.I think that a lot of this is from all of our personalities. Her parenting personality is very kind and sweet and soft - which I love to a point, she gives our boys plenty of love and care. I'm mostly nice but I can switch on stern quite easily, I'm definitely firm with them. Our 7 year old is one of those kids who tests the world and then laughs about it. Our 5 year old is quite good natured but the 7 year old can drag him into things.So mostly the 7 year old clashes with mom. We're already trying to be on the same page with my wife and I responding in the same ways to things. But then she says "but he just doesn't listen, he refuses to co-operate etc". I suggest being tougher, she claims that she tries but the 7 year old doesn't fall for 'fake tough mom'. So then she goes to 'telling your dad'. And then I get home and hear the stories, that I feel like I don't need to be a part of really, and then I'm supposed to deal with it. And they do listen to me. I don't want to be that guy and I don't think it helps for her potential in gaining authority over the whole thing.What can we do? Am I wrong in thinking that things should happen without me? Do I just suck it up and call it 'family life'? Am I supposed to be less stern to break the gap with her being such a nice, kind, empathetic, all the things that drew me to her to start with her, person? via /r/Parenting http://bit.ly/2G9SP67