My passive child keeps getting steamrolled by other kids. How can I help him learn to stick up for himself?

My son is 2.5. He's the kind of kid who doesn't need much more than a stern look from a parent or teacher to stop misbehaving and fall into line. While that's nice from a discipline standpoint, it also means that he gets his feelings hurt very easily, and he doesn't bounce back quickly from setbacks.I'm concerned about his social development. This is the age when kids are learning to interact and play together, and my kid just doesn't seem to have the resilience or the confidence to deal with other kids. For the last 8 or 9 months, I've been watching him get repeatedly steamrolled by the other kids. Kids are constantly coming and ripping toys out of his hands, or shoving him out of the way. I realize this is all developmentally normal behavior at this age, but my son doesn't stand up for himself at all. He basically crumples and lets the other kid snatch away the toy he's playing with or elbow him out of the way. He doesn't say a word, sometimes he cries, sometimes he just sits there looking sad.He is very verbal, does a lot of imaginary play, and is great at carrying on conversations with adults (though he's basically mute with other children), so I've tried to talk to him about this. He is able to tell me in a simple way what happened and that it makes him feel sad. I tell him that just because another kid tries to take something from him, that doesn't mean he has to give it away. He can hold onto the toy and say no, I'm playing with this right now, you can have it when I'm done. Or he can offer to play with the toy together (though I think that might be too advanced right now). If someone shoves their way in front of him on the playground, he can tell them that it's his turn now and the other kid needs to wait their turn. These scripts don't seem to be working, though. I don't think I have ever once seen him stick up for himself! There were a handful of occasions when he was the aggressor back when he first turned 2, and I kept reinforcing that we don't take toys from other kids and we have to wait our turn, and for whatever reason now he's become super passive.If I happen to be right there when a kid comes to take something from him, I will sometimes tell the other kid that we don't grab toys that other kids are playing with. If another parent happens to be there, I will usually narrate the situation out loud for my son, e.g., "She wants to play with this truck, too. Let's ask her to play with us! Oh, we don't grab things away from other kids - you don't have to give it up if she takes it." Usually by this point the other kid has run off with the truck in question. Maybe 50% of the time, the other parent will back me up and we help the kids resolve it in a friendly way. The other 50% of the time, the other parent says nothing, even if they're right there, and I'm left consoling my kid who is now super sad that the toy he was playing with his been taken away yet again.It's not like my son is lacking exposure to other kids. He's been going to preschool three mornings a week since August, and we go to the playground nearly every day the weather is nice enough. We're members of a local children's museum with awesome play areas where I usually take him once a week, and we do occasional playdates with my friends' kids. I've tried to enlist the help of my son's teachers, and they tell me they do try to give my son and the other kids some words to help them work through their conflicts, and enforce rules about sharing and waiting our turn. I know they can't be everywhere at once, though, and I feel like he hasn't gotten even a little bit better since the school year started.I realize this probably sounds like I'm a helicopter parent worrying over nothing. I wouldn't be as concerned if my kid occasionally stood up for himself, or even if he was occasionally the aggressor, because then I would know that he has it in him to be assertive and I'd at least have a starting point. The thing is, he NEVER stands up for himself anymore. This has been going on for the better part of a year, and it's now a pattern. I don't want him to learn that this is how the world works - other kids take your stuff, and too bad for you. I want to stand up for him and help him learn to stand up for himself, but I also don't want to hover over him constantly. These kids are 2 and 3, I don't want to be micromanaging every interaction. Any ideas on how I can help my son overcome this passivity? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2GCnJUY