Help getting my husband on board with How to Talk so Kids will Listen

My six year old has recently started testing boundaries and acting out more than usual. I picked up the book How to Talk so Kids will Listen and Listen so Kids will Talk and I am kicking myself for not doing so sooner. It's been about three weeks and I've managed to read it and the companion book for little kids. It's a lot to take in. I often find myself struggling with finding the "right tool" when I'm actually in a situation with my kid. I think I'm getting better, but it's not like I can magically say something and get her to do something she's been fighting tooth and nail not to do, at least at this point.My husband had a very strict childhood where he did what he was told or was punished. He believes that this method has made him the man he is today. We haven't had any problems before mainly because we really lucked out and our kids have been extremely well behaved. We both believe kids need rules and firm boundaries, but we disagree on what to do when they don't do what they're told. To my husband this is disrespect and he thinks I'm making a mistake when I talk or listen to my daughter when she's misbehaving.I'm still struggling with finding the right things that work with her, but I am amazed at how much more she's talking to me when I just sit and listen without offering advice or judgment. The other night though, she was being difficult about clean up, I was exhausted and when the first few things I tried didn't work my husband got upset. He said that I'm making her attitude worse by coddling her, that I'm failing her by not shutting down her bad attitude with discipline and that she's going to be spoiled brat.I feel like he's not seeing what's been successful. I've explained in depth, many times, why I think this method of listening and problem solving is better but he believes I'm hurting my daughter by not disciplining her. I honestly don't know what he expects me to do. I don't want to yell at or hit my kid. I've been thinking about this all night and I don't know what else I could say to him to give this method a fair chance. Every little bit of defiance from my kid, which I think is actually developmentally appropriate and within reason even if it is super irritating, he seems to take as proof that my way isn't working.We have four kids and I'm just wondering if there's any way I can get him to give this a fair shot? I feel like I've already explained and hyped this up. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2ueincB