It has been 2 years and 4 months since my son was born. As a father, I had one main goal for him, which was to provide a stable environment. This effort included opening a small business and failing, moving from overseas back to the US, working as a doctor again, starting my own private practice, fighting off a non compete, and deciding to separate from my soon to be ex spouse.Two big events took place in our lives this past week.His mom went back overseas to be with our second child that I still havent met. (We separated while she was still pregnant, and she had the child there.) She will be flying back and forth until our son is more adjusted and then bring our daughter to the US. When the dust has settled, we will share custody of both kids, while I pay for everything.This past week, my son and I moved into our first home. It is in a nice neighborhood. We have a vaulted living room and his playroom has a great view of eastern San Diego. I purposefully bought a house that is insanely big for just me and him. Our family can grow into it for next twenty years.The house is full of boxes, and there is a mountain of work at every corner. I am on call this weekend, and instead of taking my son to places where parents take their children on weekends, I dragged him to nursing homes and put a screen in front of him while I took care of patients. He got fussy when I was out of sight but I got things done as fast as I can before his cries got too out of control in the hallway.As a newly single parent, everything feels like a struggle. I want to respect his autonomy but he just wont let me change his sagging diapers or brush his teeth without 15 minutes of antagonism. I already have a million things to do to keep this ship floating, and I just wished he would understand that all of that is highly unnecessary. But alas, I deal with adults who dont get this so I know I am expecting too much of a toddler.Thank god I havent had a true emergency call, like a bleeding patient. If it happens, I guess he is going with me in sagging diapers and no pants.Despite the struggles, I know things could be much worse. My children may never appreciate this, but I have improved our financial position so drastically that I am having to study how generational wealth is supposed to work to prepare for my children’s future.I went thru 11 different schools before college and all public schools. Now my son is going to be starting preK at a private school and will most likely be going to the same school for K-12.Looking back to the moment I first held him in my arms in 2017, I can confidently say I have accomplished my first major goal of providing stability for him. His younger sister will get to benefit from that desire as well.I’m so relieved that things turned out the way they did. I would gladly go thru with the bone grinding labor and the fear of uncertainty again.I just wish I had a little bit more time to relax and enjoy my children, but I am working towards that future.Thank you, Aristotle and Arabelle. You helped me become the best version of myself. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/3b4l3ve
No comments:
Post a Comment