How do you stop the hair splitting

I have a defiant 10 year old. He's already lost technology, can't play with friends in winter, so there is no a whole lot of recourse I have here. But here is the typical situation:Him: Enter kitchen Me: "Leave kitchen. Dinner in an hour." Him: No Me: Now Him: NO Me: Say no again, you lose dessert. Him: Nope (didn't say 'NO')... (I didn't engage, but he lost dessert)Similar situation: he does something very irresponsible, like breaking a basic rules in the house, I call him on it. He screams at me, calling me mean, and I tell him not to talk to me like that in my house. He proceeds to walk outside, and keep talking back. he's technically not in my house now. ( The rule broken was he took food into his room).I don't push back when he does this, but he constantly seeks out minor technicalities in what I say and uses it against me. He gets it from Mom and Dad (me), because I did it when I was his age and his mom still does it, but to a far lesser degree.The point is, he justifies poor behavior by simply arguing the rule - any rule - never applied to him in the first place because he complied with some minor detail. This is the kid who threatens to tell his teachers to call child protective services because I took away his iPad and made him eat chicken and vegetables for dinner instead of girl scout cookies. He leaves to said school officials that he built a slime lab in our minivan.Anyone ever been here? I need to make this kid understand that even if he doesn't break 10% of a fair rule, he still broke 90% of it, and is responsible for the outcome.Edit: Just want to be clear, I'm talking about his conduct when we enforce rules. In any other context, he's a great kid. via /r/Parenting http://bit.ly/2G2DR0Q